Girlfriend moved in and turned my life upside down
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Anonymous
| If you moved in with her just move out. |
Anonymous
|
Oh wait . You moved in w her.
Sir , move out & get your own place. |
Anonymous
How people can leave relationships so easily. |
Anonymous
They are prima Donna who avoid basic conversations. This could easily be solved by saying: “‘sure I’m open to new cleaning and laundry supplies. However, I prefer to buy regular XYZ groceries. If you need a specific thing to be organic let’s talk about it, but not everything. And can we get some containers for your bathroom supplies and use them?’” |
Anonymous
DP I'm not as hardcore as your girlfriend, but I dealt with a chronic health condition that meant I had to cut out a lot of common household and hygiene products due to the endocrine disruptors/estrogenic chemicals. I am also very sensitive to scents. I think a lot of this depends on how she brought it up. If someone explained their health issues and said they would prefer switching to scentless products, that's a change I can't imagine most people wouldn't make on behalf of their partners. Right? It's not like giving up a pet or seeing your friends and family or even changing your work hours. It's a product, for goodness sake. One works as well as the other. The eating -- I eat healthy myself (maybe not as healthy as your girlfriend, but I prefer organic for similar reasons as the above). I would personally cook whatever my partner liked to eat and try not to rag him on his habits because they are his. Again, I think it really depends how it's done. If she's being really harsh/judgmental or not willing to hear why you don't want to drink juice all the time that's one thing. If she's cooking and shopping healthier and you are passively consuming it all while being secretly resentful and feeling controlled, that's on you. Relationship depends on both people being willing to speak up about their needs in a way that strengthens the bond. My overall take on this is that you're probably a dismissive avoidant. You have a pattern of fault-finding in relationships to shield yourself from intimacy. You are finding faults in this woman to try and get out of the relationship. You are secretly afraid that if she gets to know you she will judge and reject you, and so you're projecting both the judgmental quality and the faults on her before she can do it to you. Why do I think this? 1) you're focusing on relatively minor things to give yourself an excuse to break up with her, 2) you're 34 and divorced, so this ain't your first rodeo; you let her move in and now you're having cold feet, 3) you're posting on a messaging board about her faults instead of trying to find a way to talk with her and work with her to resolve this together, which is what you would do if you really wanted things to work. You need to decide if you want to be alone or in a relationship. What do you want your life to look like twenty, thirty years down the line? |
Anonymous
See if she’ll compromise and do Dirty Dozen / Clean Fifteen w the organic produce. If not, it means she won’t bend and you’re better off without her |
Anonymous
Funny how most posters thought SHE moved into YOUR place. Just leave! |
Anonymous
| So thread title is a mistake? |
Anonymous
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No. Sorry, I’ve been super busy and haven’t been able to check this.
Moved in with her is just how I worded it. She moved into my home that I already own. We didn’t break up but we had a long talk and came to a compromise. I will stop using scented products and she will lighten up on things I choose to use and what I eat. |
Anonymous
Ta dah! |
Anonymous
Why is the world blacl and white? Can't you discuss first? Does she have a place to live when you kick her out? Do you want to break up? |