If private school were “free”

[Anonymous]

The behavior that I witnessed when Hyattsville Middle School let out was violent and aggressive. A group of students went out into the street and stopped a car then jumped on it, banged on the windows, tried to open the doors, and yelled profanities. They then turned their attention towards one another and started fighting. Girls pulled hair and boys were on the ground throwing punches. I was walking down the neighborhood street with my baby in a stroller. The Hyattsville Historic District may be gentrified, but the school draws very rough kids. I would take the private school offer in a heartbeat. Why would you subject your child to a PG middle school???

[Anonymous]

Take it. No question. I thought we would do public all the way but my DC was badly beaten in 3rd grade, had no team teacher for 4th grade, and regular violence (throwing furniture, other kids fighting) that year too. We are applying to private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in a PG county with several solid ES options and iffy middle and high schools with some selective programs that are highly regarded.

I generally believe in public schools and we are not aiming for a high pressure, highly selective school environment. If our kids get into top colleges, it will be because they were extraordinary, not because we pushed them to the max.

ILs have offered to pay private school tuition, no strings attached. I appreciate that this is an insanely generous gift, but I am still hesitating! Am I being stupid? I know a lot of our friends and family would look at me like I have three heads if I told them I was considering saying thanks but no thanks. But if we spent the same money moving to MoCo for the schools, no one would blink, and we like where we live.

The ILs will be supportive either way, it’s not about the gift. I don’t want my hang ups about the benefits of public school to keep my kids from something good, but I went to both types of school myself and I think it’s not an easy call. Is this stupid??

We have this same offer from my MIL, and I know she could easily afford it (only two grandkids, high academic expectations, more money than she knows what to do with).

We haven't taken it yet. But I did find public schools in DC where there is no risk of violence, and the standards seem high, and both kids are 99th percentile achievers and enjoy the hustle of public school, so far. One in middle, one in elementary. They were both in a Title 1 for earlier elementary and it did become violent and standards dropped in later grades.

Maybe we'll take th offer for high school? But I'm hesitant for some reason. My husband and I were public school high fliers, and I've taught at private schools and I don't think the coddling is good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We live in a PG county with several solid ES options and iffy middle and high schools with some selective programs that are highly regarded.

I generally believe in public schools and we are not aiming for a high pressure, highly selective school environment. If our kids get into top colleges, it will be because they were extraordinary, not because we pushed them to the max.

ILs have offered to pay private school tuition, no strings attached. I appreciate that this is an insanely generous gift, but I am still hesitating! Am I being stupid? I know a lot of our friends and family would look at me like I have three heads if I told them I was considering saying thanks but no thanks. But if we spent the same money moving to MoCo for the schools, no one would blink, and we like where we live.

The ILs will be supportive either way, it’s not about the gift. I don’t want my hang ups about the benefits of public school to keep my kids from something good, but I went to both types of school myself and I think it’s not an easy call. Is this stupid??

We have this same offer from my MIL, and I know she could easily afford it (only two grandkids, high academic expectations, more money than she knows what to do with).

We haven't taken it yet. But I did find public schools in DC where there is no risk of violence, and the standards seem high, and both kids are 99th percentile achievers and enjoy the hustle of public school, so far. One in middle, one in elementary. They were both in a Title 1 for earlier elementary and it did become violent and standards dropped in later grades.

Maybe we'll take th offer for high school? But I'm hesitant for some reason. My husband and I were public school high fliers, and I've taught at private schools and I don't think the coddling is good.

DP here. I worry so much about the socioeconomic expectations and pressures. I won’t want my kids thinking extreme wealth and privilege is normal or that their (extremely comfortable) upper middle class life makes them “poor” somehow. I already see it with certain families conspicuous consumption at our public school. I just cannot even fathom what it’s like at a school that costs $50k+ per year per kid. I agree at a parochial Catholic school it’s probably less of an issue.

[Anonymous]

I would absolutely say yes.

[Anonymous]

We are talking about PG County. The worst of the worst. This is not DCPS which has some viable options.There is no JKLM or Deal.

The answer is private. You can go parochial if you want something more grounded.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely take the offer. I moved my kids from a supposedly good public school to private when they were in 3rd and 5th grade. My only regret is that I didn't do it earlier.

My DH and I both work in public schools. There are just too many behavior issues in public schools with very little consequences so students continue to misbehave. So much time is spent on the 5% of students who are completely out of control and the next 25% of students who really need extra attention to educate due to the trauma/neglect they have experienced in their life.

Now add to that that special education is underfunded so students who should be getting more services are in general education classrooms without the intensive help they need.

My kids were so surprised when they moved to private school that there weren't really disruptive students, all the students were able to do the work, the kids didn't talk back to the teachers, the bathrooms were clean, etc. The students just didn't seem to grow up so fast. They didn't go to a top tier, exclusive private school because we couldn't afford it. They went to a Christian school even though we aren't religious. We kept them there until 8th grade then in high school they are back at public in an honors track type program.

[Anonymous]

If we lived in PG, I would leap for the chance to attend a good private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The behavior that I witnessed when Hyattsville Middle School let out was violent and aggressive. A group of students went out into the street and stopped a car then jumped on it, banged on the windows, tried to open the doors, and yelled profanities. They then turned their attention towards one another and started fighting. Girls pulled hair and boys were on the ground throwing punches. I was walking down the neighborhood street with my baby in a stroller. The Hyattsville Historic District may be gentrified, but the school draws very rough kids. I would take the private school offer in a heartbeat. Why would you subject your child to a PG middle school???

Both of the Hyattsville middle options are an absolute no. I just don't want my kids in spaces where they are living those experiences regularly. I also live in Hyattsville and my children have been in private since prekindergarten. I thought we'd be okay living here and sending our children to private, but as they're getting older, the concern of their community is surfacing. And now we are planning to leave the area. There are so many pluses to Hyattsville and some things to be missed, but the county's schools are just a mess. Op, sit, and chat with current parents. Or rather, sit back and listen to current parents talking. You'll be able to make a decision then.