If private school were “free”

[Anonymous]

I would do it for middle and maybe high unless they get into magnets

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a complicated question, and a lot will depend on the specifics of the public schools in your district and privates nearby. I went to public for all 13 years and have taught in public for 24 years; my kids did public elementary, private middle, and public high school. Here some of the things we've noticed in our specific experiences. I would probably pick public, ultimately, over free private if somehow the public classes could be smaller.

Pros of private: smaller classes, more outside time, more assemblies/advisory/extra programs/field trips/experiential learning, guaranteed athletic participation, some dynamic and creative teachers, shared progressive values in the community, many opportunities for parent involvement, kids feel known by teachers, curriculum can be very creative and delves deep, sometimes kids can stay kids longer, more parents delaying the technology

Pros of public: greater diversity of student body, more development of "real world" life skills, more experienced and certified teachers, more support services (guidance, social workers, psychologists, learning differences support), more understanding of neurodiversity, generally better teaching and more direct instruction of writing, more "meeting kids where they are at" and less "molding them into something," better at handling bullying and other serious issues, better teacher to parent communication

Cons of private: pedagogy and curriculum can feel more traditional/dated, no depth of resources for student support, more faculty turnover, minimal socioeconomic diversity, less flexibility and less willing to accommodate, some teachers less responsive, teachers potentially less accountable

Cons of public: much bigger classes and school community, less outside time, for better or worse, you are exposed to more (more disruptive behavior --> could interfere with learning, could help student develop empathy, could lead to teachers becoming better and more responsive), students getting phones younger

Sorry but I don’t know any public schools that have better writing programs than private schools. That’s actually a huge con of public schools in general.

Boston suburbs v. some of the Boston private schools -- there are exceptional public high schools there with great writing programs.

[Anonymous]

I love public schools (DH and I attended public schools from ES through grad school), but we live in a wealthy area with highly rated schools. And my one kid with mild SNs is receiving so much support through his IEP and is making great progress.

If I were worried about violence or a serious low quality of teaching (not necessarily due to teachers but due to academic level of peers), I would 100% take the offer to send them to private. And I’m by no means a huge private school booster. But education (school system, extra tutoring, etc.) is the one area where I’m never worried about “spoiling” my kids with opportunities.

[Anonymous]

If my ILs were going to pay $40k+/year kid (because that's what it would cost), I would talk to them instead about funding other enrichment activities.

Private school doesn't always mean better; there's a wide variety of quality just like public school. Also, not every kid needs the same thing; so it seems premature to make a blanket decision before they are school age.

[Anonymous]

If the MS is iffy, I’d wait until then so that the children will be moving to a new school regardless of public or private. Keep in mind that great public school districts often have resources not available in private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a complicated question, and a lot will depend on the specifics of the public schools in your district and privates nearby. I went to public for all 13 years and have taught in public for 24 years; my kids did public elementary, private middle, and public high school. Here some of the things we've noticed in our specific experiences. I would probably pick public, ultimately, over free private if somehow the public classes could be smaller.

Pros of private: smaller classes, more outside time, more assemblies/advisory/extra programs/field trips/experiential learning, guaranteed athletic participation, some dynamic and creative teachers, shared progressive values in the community, many opportunities for parent involvement, kids feel known by teachers, curriculum can be very creative and delves deep, sometimes kids can stay kids longer, more parents delaying the technology

Pros of public: greater diversity of student body, more development of "real world" life skills, more experienced and certified teachers, more support services (guidance, social workers, psychologists, learning differences support), more understanding of neurodiversity, generally better teaching and more direct instruction of writing, more "meeting kids where they are at" and less "molding them into something," better at handling bullying and other serious issues, better teacher to parent communication

Cons of private: pedagogy and curriculum can feel more traditional/dated, no depth of resources for student support, more faculty turnover, minimal socioeconomic diversity, less flexibility and less willing to accommodate, some teachers less responsive, teachers potentially less accountable

Cons of public: much bigger classes and school community, less outside time, for better or worse, you are exposed to more (more disruptive behavior --> could interfere with learning, could help student develop empathy, could lead to teachers becoming better and more responsive), students getting phones younger

Sorry but I don’t know any public schools that have better writing programs than private schools. That’s actually a huge con of public schools in general.

Boston suburbs v. some of the Boston private schools -- there are exceptional public high schools there with great writing programs.

Of course there are some individual public schools, and individual private schools that are good or terrible at just about anything. Making a blanket statement that a pro of private school is that there is generally better teaching in writing, because you can think of a few schools in another city where that's true is wrong.

In the DMV, while there are certainly exceptions, private high schools are often stronger than public high schools in writing. I wouldn't say the same for any other discipline. I think in any other discipline you can really only compare one individual school to another. But for writing, private wins out. I suspect that part of this is because of significant differences in teaching loads. Writing development is so dependent on feedback, and fewer essays to grade, combined with fewer outside responsibilities like data meetings, and IEP meetings, etc . . . make easier for teachers to find time to give feedback.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in a PG county with several solid ES options and iffy middle and high schools with some selective programs that are highly regarded.

I generally believe in public schools and we are not aiming for a high pressure, highly selective school environment. If our kids get into top colleges, it will be because they were extraordinary, not because we pushed them to the max.

ILs have offered to pay private school tuition, no strings attached. I appreciate that this is an insanely generous gift, but I am still hesitating! Am I being stupid? I know a lot of our friends and family would look at me like I have three heads if I told them I was considering saying thanks but no thanks. But if we spent the same money moving to MoCo for the schools, no one would blink, and we like where we live.

The ILs will be supportive either way, it’s not about the gift. I don’t want my hang ups about the benefits of public school to keep my kids from something good, but I went to both types of school myself and I think it’s not an easy call. Is this stupid??

Just remember this: There are no free lunches.

[Anonymous]

There is no one right answer. So much depends on your kids, the schools under consideration, the costs, etc. If your kids are doing well where they are - maybe wait till older. Perhaps visit the private schools you are considering and see the differences. My child attends a no frills secular private (tuition about $15k) and it has been great for him because he of his personality and anxiety. large public school classroom was challenging for him (went from 29 kids to 12 kids at private)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in a PG county with several solid ES options and iffy middle and high schools with some selective programs that are highly regarded.

I generally believe in public schools and we are not aiming for a high pressure, highly selective school environment. If our kids get into top colleges, it will be because they were extraordinary, not because we pushed them to the max.

ILs have offered to pay private school tuition, no strings attached. I appreciate that this is an insanely generous gift, but I am still hesitating! Am I being stupid? I know a lot of our friends and family would look at me like I have three heads if I told them I was considering saying thanks but no thanks. But if we spent the same money moving to MoCo for the schools, no one would blink, and we like where we live.

The ILs will be supportive either way, it’s not about the gift. I don’t want my hang ups about the benefits of public school to keep my kids from something good, but I went to both types of school myself and I think it’s not an easy call. Is this stupid??

hunh? this is extremely confusing

you never say what your hangup is or what the benefits of public are. are you saying youd rather them go to public school in pGC than private in DMV? or that you do want to take the money but for a new house in another county? no one can answer without knowing the schools and houses in the tradeoff. whats your DH think? what is your assigned school? are your kids actually extraordinary you say "if" -are they highly evloved/mature geniuses?

id just go to the public and tell them no thanks based on this so far. seems you are enjoy making a big production about this. how old are the kids right now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are the kids?

I think you need to look at the private schools in your area, make your ILs aware of the cost in case they don't realize how high it is, and determine the entry years for each school you are interested in.

Be aware of tuition increases of 5% or more annually. It's important your ILs know what they are signing up for.

Prek and infant. They can afford private for 12 years, and so could we if it were a high priority. College is covered. If we try public and it doesn’t work out, it’s likely we’d just move to a more expensive house in a neighborhood with “better” publics by which I think I 98% just mean a more uniformly advantaged student body, which would be okay but we love our neighborhood. Our HHI has gone up a lot since we moved in.

ah, here we go. so you love the neighborhood and you like public so much that you would move for another punlic vs going private if it didnt work out. i say stay and do that and ignore others. some folks cant see that the best kids do well anyway. also those kids will prob do better in college admin. i think i would have. you can always move or transfer if something changes and hit'm up for it then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a complicated question, and a lot will depend on the specifics of the public schools in your district and privates nearby. I went to public for all 13 years and have taught in public for 24 years; my kids did public elementary, private middle, and public high school. Here some of the things we've noticed in our specific experiences. I would probably pick public, ultimately, over free private if somehow the public classes could be smaller.

Pros of private: smaller classes, more outside time, more assemblies/advisory/extra programs/field trips/experiential learning, guaranteed athletic participation, some dynamic and creative teachers, shared progressive values in the community, many opportunities for parent involvement, kids feel known by teachers, curriculum can be very creative and delves deep, sometimes kids can stay kids longer, more parents delaying the technology

Pros of public: greater diversity of student body, more development of "real world" life skills, more experienced and certified teachers, more support services (guidance, social workers, psychologists, learning differences support), more understanding of neurodiversity, generally better teaching and more direct instruction of writing, more "meeting kids where they are at" and less "molding them into something," better at handling bullying and other serious issues, better teacher to parent communication

Cons of private: pedagogy and curriculum can feel more traditional/dated, no depth of resources for student support, more faculty turnover, minimal socioeconomic diversity, less flexibility and less willing to accommodate, some teachers less responsive, teachers potentially less accountable

Cons of public: much bigger classes and school community, less outside time, for better or worse, you are exposed to more (more disruptive behavior --> could interfere with learning, could help student develop empathy, could lead to teachers becoming better and more responsive), students getting phones younger

Excellent summary. I fully agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You should definitely take their offer, you’re doing them a disservice by refusing and clinging to public schools.

Safety, discipline, better academics, better prep for college success, better college counseling, etc etc etc. Bonus points if the school has good lunches do you can stop packing PBJs.

I agree with this completely.

[Anonymous]

Yes, take the offer. Also recognize that not all private schools are created equal. You’ll need to do your research to find the best fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We were in a similar boat and took the offer. No regrets. The change in our kids attitudes, self-esteem, maturity, work ethic, breadth of education, and so much more, were things I completely failed to appreciate until I saw it happening.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a complicated question, and a lot will depend on the specifics of the public schools in your district and privates nearby. I went to public for all 13 years and have taught in public for 24 years; my kids did public elementary, private middle, and public high school. Here some of the things we've noticed in our specific experiences. I would probably pick public, ultimately, over free private if somehow the public classes could be smaller.

Pros of private: smaller classes, more outside time, more assemblies/advisory/extra programs/field trips/experiential learning, guaranteed athletic participation, some dynamic and creative teachers, shared progressive values in the community, many opportunities for parent involvement, kids feel known by teachers, curriculum can be very creative and delves deep, sometimes kids can stay kids longer, more parents delaying the technology

Pros of public: greater diversity of student body, more development of "real world" life skills, more experienced and certified teachers, more support services (guidance, social workers, psychologists, learning differences support), more understanding of neurodiversity, generally better teaching and more direct instruction of writing, more "meeting kids where they are at" and less "molding them into something," better at handling bullying and other serious issues, better teacher to parent communication

Cons of private: pedagogy and curriculum can feel more traditional/dated, no depth of resources for student support, more faculty turnover, minimal socioeconomic diversity, less flexibility and less willing to accommodate, some teachers less responsive, teachers potentially less accountable

Cons of public: much bigger classes and school community, less outside time, for better or worse, you are exposed to more (more disruptive behavior --> could interfere with learning, could help student develop empathy, could lead to teachers becoming better and more responsive), students getting phones younger

Sorry but I don’t know any public schools that have better writing programs than private schools. That’s actually a huge con of public schools in general.

Boston suburbs v. some of the Boston private schools -- there are exceptional public high schools there with great writing programs.

??? We are on a DC forum talking about someone who lives in PG County.