If private school were “free”

[Anonymous]

Assuming they can do this for the kids entire education I would jump on it.
My kid has been in small private since 4th and it’s like night and day. We had great teachers in public school in K-2nd so not knocking them. But private offers small class sizes, less violence and overall disturbances and more individual teaching.
To be fair in ES the class disruptions were due to kids with autism that were mainstreamed and were struggling, so having meltdowns, not because of violent kids. It’s still disruptive though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in a PG county with several solid ES options and iffy middle and high schools with some selective programs that are highly regarded.

I generally believe in public schools and we are not aiming for a high pressure, highly selective school environment. If our kids get into top colleges, it will be because they were extraordinary, not because we pushed them to the max.

ILs have offered to pay private school tuition, no strings attached. I appreciate that this is an insanely generous gift, but I am still hesitating! Am I being stupid? I know a lot of our friends and family would look at me like I have three heads if I told them I was considering saying thanks but no thanks. But if we spent the same money moving to MoCo for the schools, no one would blink, and we like where we live.

The ILs will be supportive either way, it’s not about the gift. I don’t want my hang ups about the benefits of public school to keep my kids from something good, but I went to both types of school myself and I think it’s not an easy call. Is this stupid??

OP stick with public

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We live in a PG county with several solid ES options and iffy middle and high schools with some selective programs that are highly regarded.

I generally believe in public schools and we are not aiming for a high pressure, highly selective school environment. If our kids get into top colleges, it will be because they were extraordinary, not because we pushed them to the max.

ILs have offered to pay private school tuition, no strings attached. I appreciate that this is an insanely generous gift, but I am still hesitating! Am I being stupid? I know a lot of our friends and family would look at me like I have three heads if I told them I was considering saying thanks but no thanks. But if we spent the same money moving to MoCo for the schools, no one would blink, and we like where we live.

The ILs will be supportive either way, it’s not about the gift. I don’t want my hang ups about the benefits of public school to keep my kids from something good, but I went to both types of school myself and I think it’s not an easy call. Is this stupid??

OP stick with public

Why?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assuming they can do this for the kids entire education I would jump on it.
My kid has been in small private since 4th and it’s like night and day. We had great teachers in public school in K-2nd so not knocking them. But private offers small class sizes, less violence and overall disturbances and more individual teaching.
To be fair in ES the class disruptions were due to kids with autism that were mainstreamed and were struggling, so having meltdowns, not because of violent kids. It’s still disruptive though.

BS BS Bs
Not one private in the DMV can compete with public’s

Privates don’t even have counselors that are certified
Nor are All the teachers
And religious privates are indoctrination centers math and science lol no

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are the kids?

I think you need to look at the private schools in your area, make your ILs aware of the cost in case they don't realize how high it is, and determine the entry years for each school you are interested in.

Be aware of tuition increases of 5% or more annually. It's important your ILs know what they are signing up for.

Prek and infant. They can afford private for 12 years, and so could we if it were a high priority. College is covered. If we try public and it doesn’t work out, it’s likely we’d just move to a more expensive house in a neighborhood with “better” publics by which I think I 98% just mean a more uniformly advantaged student body, which would be okay but we love our neighborhood. Our HHI has gone up a lot since we moved in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assuming they can do this for the kids entire education I would jump on it.
My kid has been in small private since 4th and it’s like night and day. We had great teachers in public school in K-2nd so not knocking them. But private offers small class sizes, less violence and overall disturbances and more individual teaching.
To be fair in ES the class disruptions were due to kids with autism that were mainstreamed and were struggling, so having meltdowns, not because of violent kids. It’s still disruptive though.

BS BS Bs
Not one private in the DMV can compete with public’s

Privates don’t even have counselors that are certified
Nor are All the teachers
And religious privates are indoctrination centers math and science lol no

Compete how? I mean, we’ve done both. Kid now at same private going into 7th.
We are a very liberal family and are not finding the school indoctrinating at all.

[Anonymous]

It depends on what private schools are nearby you and whether you like them for your kid. I was very anti-private initially, because I had attended a pretty crappy private myself. I moved my kid from public to a small K-8 near our house and it has been so good for her. But, we'll probably send her to public HS because I don't like any of the HS options near our house and I don't want her commuting 30+ minutes to school.

If public schools would offer what our private school does, we'd be in public: there is no prestige factor to our school, and I like our neighbors' kids. But my bright non-needy kid was getting overlooked in big classrooms with kids who needed more, and I was disappointed in the poor art and music offerings, zero field trips, limited foreign language, limited recess situation, etc. I have friends who are happy enough in public, or who are getting support for their SN kids that wouldn't be available in private, so it depends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We live in a PG county with several solid ES options and iffy middle and high schools with some selective programs that are highly regarded.

I generally believe in public schools and we are not aiming for a high pressure, highly selective school environment. If our kids get into top colleges, it will be because they were extraordinary, not because we pushed them to the max.

ILs have offered to pay private school tuition, no strings attached. I appreciate that this is an insanely generous gift, but I am still hesitating! Am I being stupid? I know a lot of our friends and family would look at me like I have three heads if I told them I was considering saying thanks but no thanks. But if we spent the same money moving to MoCo for the schools, no one would blink, and we like where we live.

The ILs will be supportive either way, it’s not about the gift. I don’t want my hang ups about the benefits of public school to keep my kids from something good, but I went to both types of school myself and I think it’s not an easy call. Is this stupid??

DO IT!
My kids attend a top top top ranked MCPS elementary and middle school and I’d move them
In a heartbeat if I could!! The difference in quality of kids, of disruptions to their day, the lockdowns at middle and high school level, the vaping and violence. The shabby facilities and more! So awful. MCPS is a disaster. If I could move I would!! We can afford to but the schools are still “too good” to justify the cost of the private we like (upwards of 50 K) and kids are happy and thriving in our publics

[Anonymous]

We were in a similar boat and took the offer. No regrets. The change in our kids attitudes, self-esteem, maturity, work ethic, breadth of education, and so much more, were things I completely failed to appreciate until I saw it happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assuming they can do this for the kids entire education I would jump on it.
My kid has been in small private since 4th and it’s like night and day. We had great teachers in public school in K-2nd so not knocking them. But private offers small class sizes, less violence and overall disturbances and more individual teaching.
To be fair in ES the class disruptions were due to kids with autism that were mainstreamed and were struggling, so having meltdowns, not because of violent kids. It’s still disruptive though.

BS BS Bs
Not one private in the DMV can compete with public’s

Privates don’t even have counselors that are certified
Nor are All the teachers
And religious privates are indoctrination centers math and science lol no

You have an agenda. That's fine. Keep your kid in public. Your kid will be fine.

[Anonymous]

I would not. But my child is thriving in a magnet immersion program that she started in elementary and is now in middle school. She wants to stay in it through high school. I think her school is fantastic and the occasional fights/vaping don’t seem to bother her. She feels safe.

My other kid has profound intellectual disability and no private would take her.

[Anonymous]

It’s not free. Even with grandparents paying. We were in a similar position and ended up switching back to public. There is so much keeping up with the joneses at private schools and when you are in a different income bracket you cannot keep up. Your children will know it and feel it when they don’t have what the other kids do and can’t do what the other kids are doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s not free. Even with grandparents paying. We were in a similar position and ended up switching back to public. There is so much keeping up with the joneses at private schools and when you are in a different income bracket you cannot keep up. Your children will know it and feel it when they don’t have what the other kids do and can’t do what the other kids are doing.

As an example… my kids two best friends from private school are part of a country club and do swim team there. Kid feels left out because we’re not members. That’s not a rare situation.

And I’m not poor. I make 250K a year. But at the privates around here, most have incomes topping $1mil.

[Anonymous]

College is the priority. How long can they pay? Is it no strings or guilt attached? What happens when they pass? Can you maintain it? For special needs, yes.

I ask the questions as my dad offered to pay. We found a small cheap school from preschool to second that we loved. When it came time to pay he changed his mind. Thankfully we could pay. With special needs it was best vs public. It was worth the money as my child did very very well there.

My mom offered to pay part of hs but too many strings attached and I did not trust she’d pay despite having the money. We declined.

We ended up in public to make sure we could pay to college and grad school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not free. Even with grandparents paying. We were in a similar position and ended up switching back to public. There is so much keeping up with the joneses at private schools and when you are in a different income bracket you cannot keep up. Your children will know it and feel it when they don’t have what the other kids do and can’t do what the other kids are doing.

As an example… my kids two best friends from private school are part of a country club and do swim team there. Kid feels left out because we’re not members. That’s not a rare situation.

And I’m not poor. I make 250K a year. But at the privates around here, most have incomes topping $1mil.

Doing swim team is no big deal. You have a big income. You have that in public too.