Tips on having a discreet, private pregnancy, birth and postpartum experience?

[Anonymous]

Damn you sounds weird AF. You'll need support and these actions will definitely leave you without a village.

[Anonymous]

Don't tell anyone you're pregnant. That will seem strange enough that most will leave you alone.

[Anonymous]

I think you’ve gotten enough advice. I just want to add that I was pretty surprised at how having a child is not really a private affair. Even after you have the baby, many people are going to insert themselves into your life for years to come.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This sounds really weird. Is there some sort of abuse situation going on? Or are you suffering from Main Character Syndrome? I can’t figure out which one it is, and would tailor my advice accordingly

Also can’t determine the root of what’s going on here, but I can tell you it crosses into the realm of weird - and I am someone who has been very low key about pregnancies, dislikes being the center of attention, certainly have never posted anything about my kids/pregnancies on social media, etc.

[Anonymous]

Just be very unfriendly, very few people will care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Currently 7 weeks pg.

What I (and also DH) do not want:
-A baby shower
-To be photographed while pregnant
-Anyone we know besides DH & I at the hospital
-To announce the pregnancy prior to 1-2 months before the birth
-any social media posts about the pregnancy

Absolutely no way are either of our parents stepping foot in our house until baby is several months old, nor will we be willing to travel with baby before that time.

We don’t care about strangers, coworkers, friends or acquaintances knowing. We have clingy families. They all live 2-4 hours away.

Are you in therapy? I think you could benefit from some.

[Anonymous]

Seems off. I actually wirry about your child.

[Anonymous]

Is this your first baby because this level of control is gonna be unachievable when they arrive
Babies don’t care about your plans

[Anonymous]

Weirdo. I'm concerned for your kid's future.

[Anonymous]

This reminds me of the south park episode about Meagan and Harry - loudly protesting that they DEMAND privacy.

If you don't want your pregnancy and birth shared, don't share it. Simple and done.

I'm 99.9% sure there are no paparazzi in your bushes or stalking you at target. Lol.

[Anonymous]

I really doubt anyone is going to care, OP, because you sound really odd. I’m concerned re what this is going to do to your child, however. Children deserve to be acknowledged and celebrated.

[Anonymous]

This is so extra and narcissistic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really doubt anyone is going to care, OP, because you sound really odd. I’m concerned re what this is going to do to your child, however. Children deserve to be acknowledged and celebrated.

Of course they don’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really doubt anyone is going to care, OP, because you sound really odd. I’m concerned re what this is going to do to your child, however. Children deserve to be acknowledged and celebrated.

Of course they don’t.

Are you the same bitter MIL posting on the holiday thread?

[Anonymous]

Op you need a therapist. This is not a normal
Perspective. It’s extremely concerning to be so controlling and the reality is that pregnancy, birth, postpartum and parenting have many elements you cannot control. Learning to have an adaptive, resilient, flexible mindset and to realize the limits of what you can control is an exercise best done with a therapist now and not with a newborn who will upend the life you have as you know it.

I say this as someone who also wanted privacy and to be discrete when I was pregnant but guess what, you don’t get to control how you look, people noticing your body and pregnancy, people staring at you, making comments, etc. What you also don’t know now is that pregnancy is the last time you’ll be getting any attention, once baby arrives you will just be Larla’s mom and all anyone will care about is the baby.