Why is it so hard for young adults to find good partners?

[Anonymous]

Because social media has led women to believe most “average” guys make 6 figs, are 6ft tall, have a nice car, and are 6in downstairs when in reality this is the top 5-10% of men. Therefore all women chase the top 10% and the average men are left behind and labeled as “incels”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because social media has led women to believe most “average” guys make 6 figs, are 6ft tall, have a nice car, and are 6in downstairs when in reality this is the top 5-10% of men. Therefore all women chase the top 10% and the average men are left behind and labeled as “incels”

It’s not 1950; women have to incentive to marry someone they aren’t 100% satisfied with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because social media has led women to believe most “average” guys make 6 figs, are 6ft tall, have a nice car, and are 6in downstairs when in reality this is the top 5-10% of men. Therefore all women chase the top 10% and the average men are left behind and labeled as “incels”

I know a lot of women that make six figures, can take care of children and cook and are pretty and fit and have at least a size B breast. It's more than 5-10%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there actually data on this?

If it’s true, it’s probably because there is divergence between what men are looking for and what women are looking for in a relationship (for heterosexual couples).

Such as?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The culture of instant gratification, the in-person awkwardness after so much screen time, the imbalanced male-female ratio at colleges, the idea that you have to have all the boxes checked before settling down, the decline of social pressure to get married and have children, the ideal of your partner being your all-in-one emotional, economic, physical soulmate...

Add to that (and this is part of instant gratification) addiction to pornography. I am a millennial woman and all the men my age I ever dated had this problem and therefore "performed" like men 60+ years old.

And the culture of every young person having a diagnosed mental health problem and being on medication probably doesn't help. Many psych meds mess with libido, too. I'm sure they help some young people, but for the majority of teens, I don't think the benefits outweigh the risks.

One thing I will say about this PP, which I largely agree with, is that I think the declining pressure to marry/have children is a good thing. Many people should not have kids. Many people should have fewer kids than the "2.5" picket fence ideal. It is good to be thoughtful and cautious about these choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Add to that (and this is part of instant gratification) addiction to pornography. I am a millennial woman and all the men my age I ever dated had this problem and therefore "performed" like men 60+ years old.

Is it because everyone has lots of sexual experience which raises the bar and the pressure on individuals? Humans tend to marry in early 20's and had one or just a couple of sexual partners, not dozen plus of today's minimum.

[Anonymous]

*use to marry

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Add to that (and this is part of instant gratification) addiction to pornography. I am a millennial woman and all the men my age I ever dated had this problem and therefore "performed" like men 60+ years old.

Is it because everyone has lots of sexual experience which raises the bar and the pressure on individuals? Humans tend to marry in early 20's and had one or just a couple of sexual partners, not dozen plus of today's minimum.

Personally I don't think so. And I think promiscuity has been going on for a long time. Ever heard of the '70s?

[Anonymous]

What’s in it for women?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so difficult for young adults to find suitable and sincere partners?

Is your AC finding bad insincere partners? Does your AC like those partners?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is it so difficult for young adults to find suitable and sincere partners?

Is your AC finding bad insincere partners? Does your AC like those partners?

Its not about a specific AC but an observation of 19-35 age group.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Collapsing fertility from unhealthy woke medicated psycho culture.

Devolving and dying out end game.

You’re insane, but I admire your dedication to your insanity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The culture of instant gratification, the in-person awkwardness after so much screen time, the imbalanced male-female ratio at colleges, the idea that you have to have all the boxes checked before settling down, the decline of social pressure to get married and have children, the ideal of your partner being your all-in-one emotional, economic, physical soulmate...

+ 1 million It's unrealistic. And I'll add what many DCUM posters won't consider, but finding a loving partner who also has a strong faith in God and believes in the commitment to marriage.

[Anonymous]

I read a book a while back. I can't recall the title. The book explains using data how American culture has changed from a courtship culture. Young women would know the intentions of the men she was dating. Most relationships would progress from courtship to marriage in a typical pattern. Now it's more challenging for young people to even know what type of relationship they are in until they've invested more time. Are they going to be dating exclusively? Will they be dating for several years? Will they be engaged for several years? Will they live together for several years? Look at Prince William and Princess Kate. The press named her "Waity Katy" because she made it her life's ambition to have a low key education and career with the ultimate goal to marry Prince William. Her investment of time and energy led her to her goal. Some women really want the same thing, but they're investments of time and energy will not pay off.

[Anonymous]

My DC has said they intend to be single & childfree.