Today’s young adults want apologies from their parents; parents want a thank you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you think this is a real dynamic?

Young adults (18-23) with a sense of being wronged. They’re exhausted parents who did everything they could.

Lots of resentment bubbling over.

I think so. If their parents didn't want to procreate, young people wouldn't have a single problem to begin with. You bring other humans into this world without their consents, pass your subpar genes, do flawed parenting with your limited emotional and financial resources in a messed up world, the least you can do is to apologize. I'm only half kidding here, even the best of parents are literally the source of half of the problems kids face.

Wow. Speechless.

Well kids cause a lot of expense and trouble for the unsuspecting parents too. It evens the score.

I'm honestly saying this all with a light heart (I'm not either of those PPs), but he response to this is why would the parent be unsuspecting? Shouldn't we know what we are getting into when we bring a child into the world?

No. You are told it’s really hard and you see that it’s really hard, but you don’t *really* get it until it’s too late! And Mother Nature sets it up so you decide to have another one right when your first is getting easier but still really cute and importantly, small enough to control easily. You don't get how the teen years will go until it’s too late and you have more than one! Such a bait and switch! If they started as teens, 75% would be only children.

Honest question: what was it you didn’t understand about raising children until you had kids?

[Anonymous]

Most of today's parents only see kids for couple of waking hours. They have daycare, nannies, schools, before/after school activities, summer camps, ski camps and baby sitters to do most of the upbringing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of today's parents only see kids for couple of waking hours. They have daycare, nannies, schools, before/after school activities, summer camps, ski camps and baby sitters to do most of the upbringing.

* most of today's mothers, fathers always had choices

[Anonymous]

Well, I'm 40 and I'd love an apology from my parents. Doubt I'll ever get one, as it's never happened. But I'll let you know if anything changes.

I'd never expect a thank you from my children for the mere act of raising them. They didn't ask to be born, that's on me.

I am young at heart, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let's forget passing genetic disorders, abandoning or abusing children and other bigger issues, just passing mediocre looks and IQ and then raising them with little resources while they compete with beautiful, intelligent and resourceful peers, is it really fair? Hard to say but how many parents actually even consider these thoughts?

Less resources and wisdom parents have, more kids they want to bring to this world. Its a complex issue and no body knows the answer but yes, even with best of intentions and efforts, plenty of mistakes are made.

Ooh, in the name of improving this world, let's limit who can procreate. Let's examine everyone, find the defective ones and sterilize them, so no future kid will have to suffer.

Wait, hasn't this already been tried somewhere?

[Anonymous]

I would never want my parents to feel bad or apologize for what they couldn't because they did the best they could. It wasn't perfect or enough but their intentions were pure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let's forget passing genetic disorders, abandoning or abusing children and other bigger issues, just passing mediocre looks and IQ and then raising them with little resources while they compete with beautiful, intelligent and resourceful peers, is it really fair? Hard to say but how many parents actually even consider these thoughts?

Less resources and wisdom parents have, more kids they want to bring to this world. Its a complex issue and no body knows the answer but yes, even with best of intentions and efforts, plenty of mistakes are made.

Ooh, in the name of improving this world, let's limit who can procreate. Let's examine everyone, find the defective ones and sterilize them, so no future kid will have to suffer.

Wait, hasn't this already been tried somewhere?

Having information and resources to make educated decisions isn't the same as decisions being forced upon you. Is it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you think this is a real dynamic?

Young adults (18-23) with a sense of being wronged. They’re exhausted parents who did everything they could.

Lots of resentment bubbling over.

I think so. If their parents didn't want to procreate, young people wouldn't have a single problem to begin with. You bring other humans into this world without their consents, pass your subpar genes, do flawed parenting with your limited emotional and financial resources in a messed up world, the least you can do is to apologize. I'm only half kidding here, even the best of parents are literally the source of half of the problems kids face.

Wow. Speechless.

Well kids cause a lot of expense and trouble for the unsuspecting parents too. It evens the score.

I'm honestly saying this all with a light heart (I'm not either of those PPs), but he response to this is why would the parent be unsuspecting? Shouldn't we know what we are getting into when we bring a child into the world?

No. You are told it’s really hard and you see that it’s really hard, but you don’t *really* get it until it’s too late! And Mother Nature sets it up so you decide to have another one right when your first is getting easier but still really cute and importantly, small enough to control easily. You don't get how the teen years will go until it’s too late and you have more than one! Such a bait and switch! If they started as teens, 75% would be only children.

Honest question: what was it you didn’t understand about raising children until you had kids?

I did not understand how biased our society is against mothers. It seems that we are praising motherhood while quietly stubbing mothers in the back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let's forget passing genetic disorders, abandoning or abusing children and other bigger issues, just passing mediocre looks and IQ and then raising them with little resources while they compete with beautiful, intelligent and resourceful peers, is it really fair? Hard to say but how many parents actually even consider these thoughts?

Less resources and wisdom parents have, more kids they want to bring to this world. Its a complex issue and no body knows the answer but yes, even with best of intentions and efforts, plenty of mistakes are made.

Ooh, in the name of improving this world, let's limit who can procreate. Let's examine everyone, find the defective ones and sterilize them, so no future kid will have to suffer.

Wait, hasn't this already been tried somewhere?

Having information and resources to make educated decisions isn't the same as decisions being forced upon you. Is it?

NP. So the information would be “your average children would have to compete against h average children and having a child wouldn’t really be fair to them?” So not eugenics, just eugenicist propaganda?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let's forget passing genetic disorders, abandoning or abusing children and other bigger issues, just passing mediocre looks and IQ and then raising them with little resources while they compete with beautiful, intelligent and resourceful peers, is it really fair? Hard to say but how many parents actually even consider these thoughts?

Less resources and wisdom parents have, more kids they want to bring to this world. Its a complex issue and no body knows the answer but yes, even with best of intentions and efforts, plenty of mistakes are made.

Ooh, in the name of improving this world, let's limit who can procreate. Let's examine everyone, find the defective ones and sterilize them, so no future kid will have to suffer.

Wait, hasn't this already been tried somewhere?

Having information and resources to make educated decisions isn't the same as decisions being forced upon you. Is it?

If the "educated decision" is to procreate only if you are beautiful, intelligent and resourceful, that ... sounds awfully close to eugenics.

[Anonymous]

My DC has a few friends whose mothers abandoned their families. One friend's biological mother left her as a child with her stepfather, who raised her. Biological mom fully out of the picture. They're all mid-20s. Parents largely UMC white people.

I mean, I don't know anyone in my generation who was abandoned by their mother, at least physically. Perhaps the abandonment was psychological or otherwise. All I know is, it's terrible to be abandoned by your mother, and yet, my kid has friends who experienced this. I can see how young adults who had to go through life without a mother's care, should get an apology from these deadbeats. Hell, even a helicopter mom is better than being abandoned.

[Anonymous]

Boomers have a lot to apologize for and money to pay to their children

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Z’s are mostly selfish a**holes

Signed,

Parent to two Z’s

Your poor children. I hope they find good therapists.

Signed,

Parent to two Z’s.

And another thing: Z’s want therapy for every little difficulty they face in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you think this is a real dynamic?

Young adults (18-23) with a sense of being wronged. They’re exhausted parents who did everything they could.

Lots of resentment bubbling over.

I think so. If their parents didn't want to procreate, young people wouldn't have a single problem to begin with. You bring other humans into this world without their consents, pass your subpar genes, do flawed parenting with your limited emotional and financial resources in a messed up world, the least you can do is to apologize. I'm only half kidding here, even the best of parents are literally the source of half of the problems kids face.

Wow. Speechless.

Well kids cause a lot of expense and trouble for the unsuspecting parents too. It evens the score.

I'm honestly saying this all with a light heart (I'm not either of those PPs), but he response to this is why would the parent be unsuspecting? Shouldn't we know what we are getting into when we bring a child into the world?

No. You are told it’s really hard and you see that it’s really hard, but you don’t *really* get it until it’s too late! And Mother Nature sets it up so you decide to have another one right when your first is getting easier but still really cute and importantly, small enough to control easily. You don't get how the teen years will go until it’s too late and you have more than one! Such a bait and switch! If they started as teens, 75% would be only children.

Honest question: what was it you didn’t understand about raising children until you had kids?

I did not understand how biased our society is against mothers. It seems that we are praising motherhood while quietly stubbing mothers in the back.

Can you provide an example?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Boomers have a lot to apologize for and money to pay to their children

We’ve paid plenty already in reparations. Find some other tree to shake.