Please don't ask for "gifts of time"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are not dining indoors yet, definitely just say no to that request.

If you aren’t dining indoors yet, start dining indoors already.

NP. You and the other "why aren't you dining indoors" PPs, please, go enjoy your restaurant visits. Some of us are not eating out in restaurants. Our family does go to plays and concerts (masked at both) but nope, not going to unmask and eat in restaurants this winter at all. Look up this thing doctors are calling the "tripledemic." Some of us have loved ones who cannot afford to get sick at all, even though they're vaccinated, so we protect them by protecting ourselves. Count yourselves lucky that your family's health can withstand Covid and/or flu and/or RSV, and lucky that you feel you can can blithely go around unmasked and eating out--but please stow the snark and judgement aimed at those who make choices different from yours. I'm not insisting YOU mask up everywhere, so you don't get to insist that OP and I and others "start dining indoors already."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are putting together wishlists that are inconvenient - aren't they all? adults just buy what they want when they want-- then when someone asks for a wishlist we all need a better answer...

What say you, DCUM? Someone asks for a wishlist you say

1. We are blessedly able to purchase all we need have have no list
2. We are adults, trish, so we just buy what we need and suggest you do the same.
3. Awww so sweet of you to think of us. We have what we need, but if you want to pick up the tab for the kids 4K summer camp, that would be PRIMO.
4. Just cash thanks

Because this comes off as smug, superior, and condescending, with more than a hint of judgment. None of this reflects well on you, though that may be your intent. Be gracious. It's the holidays, after all. No one likes some virtue signaling smuggie lecturing them about a gift exchange.

Isn’t the magic of a gift that you don’t have to shop for it? So say anything like — or we’d love some nice wine; I always love jewelry; some fancy food stuff would be great; gift certificate to any restaurant you think we’d like (and maybe babysitting too!); any book you think we’d enjoy; cute stuff for our cute dog, etc. I don’t see why this is so hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are not dining indoors yet, definitely just say no to that request.

If you aren’t dining indoors yet, start dining indoors already.

NP. You and the other "why aren't you dining indoors" PPs, please, go enjoy your restaurant visits. Some of us are not eating out in restaurants. Our family does go to plays and concerts (masked at both) but nope, not going to unmask and eat in restaurants this winter at all. Look up this thing doctors are calling the "tripledemic." Some of us have loved ones who cannot afford to get sick at all, even though they're vaccinated, so we protect them by protecting ourselves. Count yourselves lucky that your family's health can withstand Covid and/or flu and/or RSV, and lucky that you feel you can can blithely go around unmasked and eating out--but please stow the snark and judgement aimed at those who make choices different from yours. I'm not insisting YOU mask up everywhere, so you don't get to insist that OP and I and others "start dining indoors already."

So smug. So virtuous! Such high morals. You do you, PP. The rest of us heathens will enjoy dinners out, unmasked and happy. Continue to live in fear a la March 2020.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If this OP is still not dining indoors, why are you having family get togethers for the holidays? I guess COVID only strikes at restaurants- but it’s nice enough to leave Christmas dinner alone.

The logic. It hurts.

Umm...it's called having priorities? I sent my kids back to day care and school and saw my parents LONG before I set foot inside a restaurant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate gift giving between adults. I find it SO tedious and sort of demeaning. My MIL insists. I pass this off the my DH every year, but it's so awkward and weird. She makes us sit around and open one at a time and while this makes sense to me for children or a small group, with a very large group it's SO annoying.

If I wander away to tend to a kid, or get a drink, or use the bathroom it's always "Where is she? What is she doing? It's her turn. She missed Aunt Millie opening the waffle iron I bought her off her Amazon list, she has to see it!"

Down with adult gift giving! Focus on the kids and then let's free ourselves up to just buy ourselves something we've wanted to celebrate Christmas.

+1 so awkward with my ILs and every year I hope we'll end it but zero luck

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are not dining indoors yet, definitely just say no to that request.

If you aren’t dining indoors yet, start dining indoors already.

NP. You and the other "why aren't you dining indoors" PPs, please, go enjoy your restaurant visits. Some of us are not eating out in restaurants. Our family does go to plays and concerts (masked at both) but nope, not going to unmask and eat in restaurants this winter at all. Look up this thing doctors are calling the "tripledemic." Some of us have loved ones who cannot afford to get sick at all, even though they're vaccinated, so we protect them by protecting ourselves. Count yourselves lucky that your family's health can withstand Covid and/or flu and/or RSV, and lucky that you feel you can can blithely go around unmasked and eating out--but please stow the snark and judgement aimed at those who make choices different from yours. I'm not insisting YOU mask up everywhere, so you don't get to insist that OP and I and others "start dining indoors already."

So smug. So virtuous! Such high morals. You do you, PP. The rest of us heathens will enjoy dinners out, unmasked and happy. Continue to live in fear a la March 2020.

Not pp. You're a jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To preface this, I have asked to stop exchanging Christmas gifts among adults and no one agreed.

This year the older adults on both sides (parents and inlaws and one aunt) all said that the only thing they want for Christmas is a specific way of spending time with us. One asked for monthly video calls, one asked for dinners out together, one asked to vacation together. This sucks. First of all there is nothing to unwrap, when they are getting my family many things to unwrap, so that doesn't work. Second, these are people I already call weekly or see at least monthly, so it's kind of insulting for them to ask for this time as a gift, as if we ignore them. And third -- if we wanted to do these things we'd be doing them: the kids don't do well on video calls, we are not dining indoors yet, etc. It feels manipulative.

I am an adult with a good income to buy what I want for my family, but I still put together a small list of physical gifts when relatives ask what my family would like. Sometimes this means postponing a purchase it would be more convenient to make myself, but I do it so they can give a wrapped gift like they want to. I wish they'd be mature enough to do the same -- OR stop exchanging gifts.

it's time to come out of your ridiculous bubble!

It’s time for you hysterical COVID minimizes to get lives!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are not dining indoors yet, definitely just say no to that request.

If you aren’t dining indoors yet, start dining indoors already.

No. Other people do and will continue to make different choices than you do. Deal with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're not dining indoors yet?

Right…that’s so weird. If not now, when, OP? Flippin COVID freaks of DCUM.

Oh, you’re in middle school. Got it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To preface this, I have asked to stop exchanging Christmas gifts among adults and no one agreed.

This year the older adults on both sides (parents and inlaws and one aunt) all said that the only thing they want for Christmas is a specific way of spending time with us. One asked for monthly video calls, one asked for dinners out together, one asked to vacation together. This sucks. First of all there is nothing to unwrap, when they are getting my family many things to unwrap, so that doesn't work. Second, these are people I already call weekly or see at least monthly, so it's kind of insulting for them to ask for this time as a gift, as if we ignore them. And third -- if we wanted to do these things we'd be doing them: the kids don't do well on video calls, we are not dining indoors yet, etc. It feels manipulative.

I am an adult with a good income to buy what I want for my family, but I still put together a small list of physical gifts when relatives ask what my family would like. Sometimes this means postponing a purchase it would be more convenient to make myself, but I do it so they can give a wrapped gift like they want to. I wish they'd be mature enough to do the same -- OR stop exchanging gifts.

You’re not “dining indoors yet”? Wtf is wrong with you? Jesus Christ see someone about that deep rooted and absurd anxiety disorder. It’s time to move passed the pandemic.

Please seek extensive therapy to deal with the fact that other people aren’t doing the same things you are. Or, you know, try getting a life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To preface this, I have asked to stop exchanging Christmas gifts among adults and no one agreed.

This year the older adults on both sides (parents and inlaws and one aunt) all said that the only thing they want for Christmas is a specific way of spending time with us. One asked for monthly video calls, one asked for dinners out together, one asked to vacation together. This sucks. First of all there is nothing to unwrap, when they are getting my family many things to unwrap, so that doesn't work. Second, these are people I already call weekly or see at least monthly, so it's kind of insulting for them to ask for this time as a gift, as if we ignore them. And third -- if we wanted to do these things we'd be doing them: the kids don't do well on video calls, we are not dining indoors yet, etc. It feels manipulative.

I am an adult with a good income to buy what I want for my family, but I still put together a small list of physical gifts when relatives ask what my family would like. Sometimes this means postponing a purchase it would be more convenient to make myself, but I do it so they can give a wrapped gift like they want to. I wish they'd be mature enough to do the same -- OR stop exchanging gifts.

I had to check the date on this post.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?

GET A LIFE. Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you are not dining indoors yet, definitely just say no to that request.

If you aren’t dining indoors yet, start dining indoors already.

NP. You and the other "why aren't you dining indoors" PPs, please, go enjoy your restaurant visits. Some of us are not eating out in restaurants. Our family does go to plays and concerts (masked at both) but nope, not going to unmask and eat in restaurants this winter at all. Look up this thing doctors are calling the "tripledemic." Some of us have loved ones who cannot afford to get sick at all, even though they're vaccinated, so we protect them by protecting ourselves. Count yourselves lucky that your family's health can withstand Covid and/or flu and/or RSV, and lucky that you feel you can can blithely go around unmasked and eating out--but please stow the snark and judgement aimed at those who make choices different from yours. I'm not insisting YOU mask up everywhere, so you don't get to insist that OP and I and others "start dining indoors already."

So smug. So virtuous! Such high morals. You do you, PP. The rest of us heathens will enjoy dinners out, unmasked and happy. Continue to live in fear a la March 2020.

You are SO insecure. Why is that?

[Anonymous]

I would reflect on why they are asking this -on two different sides of the family n oless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To preface this, I have asked to stop exchanging Christmas gifts among adults and no one agreed.

This year the older adults on both sides (parents and inlaws and one aunt) all said that the only thing they want for Christmas is a specific way of spending time with us. One asked for monthly video calls, one asked for dinners out together, one asked to vacation together. This sucks. First of all there is nothing to unwrap, when they are getting my family many things to unwrap, so that doesn't work. Second, these are people I already call weekly or see at least monthly, so it's kind of insulting for them to ask for this time as a gift, as if we ignore them. And third -- if we wanted to do these things we'd be doing them: the kids don't do well on video calls, we are not dining indoors yet, etc. It feels manipulative.

I am an adult with a good income to buy what I want for my family, but I still put together a small list of physical gifts when relatives ask what my family would like. Sometimes this means postponing a purchase it would be more convenient to make myself, but I do it so they can give a wrapped gift like they want to. I wish they'd be mature enough to do the same -- OR stop exchanging gifts.

You ask to stop exchanging gifts, but then whine that there will be nothing to unwrap... you seem confused.

If people don't want physical gifts then don't; give physical gifts. If you don't like the gift to time they requested think of something else. personally I hate most physical gifts, especially giving gifts just to give gifts.


Is it 2020... who the hell is still not dining indoors... only on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To preface this, I have asked to stop exchanging Christmas gifts among adults and no one agreed.

This year the older adults on both sides (parents and inlaws and one aunt) all said that the only thing they want for Christmas is a specific way of spending time with us. One asked for monthly video calls, one asked for dinners out together, one asked to vacation together. This sucks. First of all there is nothing to unwrap, when they are getting my family many things to unwrap, so that doesn't work. Second, these are people I already call weekly or see at least monthly, so it's kind of insulting for them to ask for this time as a gift, as if we ignore them. And third -- if we wanted to do these things we'd be doing them: the kids don't do well on video calls, we are not dining indoors yet, etc. It feels manipulative.

I am an adult with a good income to buy what I want for my family, but I still put together a small list of physical gifts when relatives ask what my family would like. Sometimes this means postponing a purchase it would be more convenient to make myself, but I do it so they can give a wrapped gift like they want to. I wish they'd be mature enough to do the same -- OR stop exchanging gifts.

I had to check the date on this post.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?

GET A LIFE. Grow up.

Ha ha ha ha. Ok, will do. Good one. And you enjoy your life. It sounds like a real blast.