Lack of respect for house

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. These responses are kinda interesting, and thanks for sharing. They seem to be in three camps : 1) you need to expect wear-and-tear because people have different standards, and some live rough; 2) you need to instruct your guests how to meet your standards or hover over them for the quick save. 3) you shouldn’t host.

To me, it’s astonishing that so many would-be visitors struggle with the basics.

Then again, I attended an elite private college and was a RA. I recall that some students thought it was their “right” to tear up the dorm because their parents paid rent. They didn’t seem to understand or want to understand that rent was for reasonable use of the space, not abuse.

I guess I’m cut from different cloth.

This speaks volumes to your character. Do not host. No one will live up to your standards.

Yeah. OP and snobby jerk (correctly self-identified) “tract home” and “Ashley furniture” PP belong together. Clearly money can’t buy class.

I am laughing at that that snobby jerk's comment since I just bought a recliner from Ashley. It's great because my kids, dog, or I can relax on it, and I don't worry about it since I didn't pay a fortune.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. These responses are kinda interesting, and thanks for sharing. They seem to be in three camps : 1) you need to expect wear-and-tear because people have different standards, and some live rough; 2) you need to instruct your guests how to meet your standards or hover over them for the quick save. 3) you shouldn’t host.

To me, it’s astonishing that so many would-be visitors struggle with the basics.

Then again, I attended an elite private college and was a RA. I recall that some students thought it was their “right” to tear up the dorm because their parents paid rent. They didn’t seem to understand or want to understand that rent was for reasonable use of the space, not abuse.

I guess I’m cut from different cloth.

This speaks volumes to your character. Do not host. No one will live up to your standards.

Yeah. OP and snobby jerk (correctly self-identified) “tract home” and “Ashley furniture” PP belong together. Clearly money can’t buy class.

I am laughing at that that snobby jerk's comment since I just bought a recliner from Ashley. It's great because my kids, dog, or I can relax on it, and I don't worry about it since I didn't pay a fortune.

Bingo. My costco sectional in the tv room was one of the best purchases when my kids were babies. No need to freak out about the occasional yogurt smear or exuberant kid jumping around. Life is too short!

We have a "fancy couch" the kids know they need to be on the A game around. kids need a place they can learn -- it's not reasonable to expect total perfection.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand the problem with putting the towels in with the sheets. Aren’t you going to scoop them all up after the guests leave and put them in the washing machine?

Your guests aren’t horrible, disrespectful people, OP, they are just a mismatch for how you do things. They should stay in a hotel next time. But drop the judgement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have learned that everyone has super different ideas of what is and is not appropriate. I’m from the Uk where it’s a given that you strip your bed after you stay somewhere so the host can easily wash your sheets. Virtually none of my us guests do this which are first I thought was beyond rude but now I understand it’s just a cultural difference

In my view, it is extremely rude to strip beds without ***asking the host first.***

When you politely ASK what would be helpful to your host and then LISTEN to the answer, you may learn that some do indeed prefer for the beds to be stripped, and some prefer that you just leave it as-is (but I always neatly make the bed and make sure the room is tidy).

They may have a laundry schedule you don’t know about, or a cleaning service coming on a day you don’t know about, it. They may prefer to have one day of guests being gone to relax before they tackle chores.

ASSuming is rude. ASKING is polite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I host a lot but make things clear for the guest. I tell them either just leave the sheets and towels in front of the washer or throw the towels in the washer and the sheets on the floor.

We don't allow food all over our house. Inhare cleaning sticky messes outside of the kitchen nut inevitably I have a guest that let's their kid eat gogurt in a bedroom or living room. I sigh and clean it up.

You need to treat your wood furniture if you don't want people leaving sweat stains. I put a glass cover on a lot of my wood furniture for this reason. No one uses coasters.

Glass covers look cheap and are cheesy! Do you also put plastic over your sofas?

NP. Glass "covers" in my house mean custom cut glass tops that fit the couple of end tables, like the handmade inlaid wood table a relative made.

Nothing cheap about that glass at all, PP, and sure as hell not as "cheesy" as wet rings on a wood table we love. Plus: Reduced stress, since it's a pain to have to ensure guests are using coasters on a wood tabletop.


Yes..I was talking about custom cut glass to fit prices end tables. So ugly. Don’t invite guests who don’t know to use coasters.

And no, we don't put plastic over the sofas. But if you think glass is cheap and cheesy, you don't know what you're talking about.

[Anonymous]

There is absolutely nothing tacky about glass over end tables. It's totally practical and you get 99% of the look you are going for with the wood tables.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Leave these coasters out.

I came here to post this! #teamLarry

[Anonymous]

If you have ever refinished floors, or built cabinets or furniture, or spent the time to make the fine objects OP is trying to preserve from the feral relatives, you'll probably have a different view of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. These responses are kinda interesting, and thanks for sharing. They seem to be in three camps : 1) you need to expect wear-and-tear because people have different standards, and some live rough; 2) you need to instruct your guests how to meet your standards or hover over them for the quick save. 3) you shouldn’t host.

To me, it’s astonishing that so many would-be visitors struggle with the basics.

Then again, I attended an elite private college and was a RA. I recall that some students thought it was their “right” to tear up the dorm because their parents paid rent. They didn’t seem to understand or want to understand that rent was for reasonable use of the space, not abuse.

I guess I’m cut from different cloth.

Accidents happen. But people should try to take care of the things in a home when they are visiting. We have old not-too-expensive furnishings, but we still don't want to replace them due to someone's carelessness.

We once rented an expensive beach house with another family who stated the rental company priced in a certain amount of breakage and things going missing. Maybe so, but that's not a reason to destroy things without remorse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand the problem with putting the towels in with the sheets. Aren’t you going to scoop them all up after the guests leave and put them in the washing machine?

Your guests aren’t horrible, disrespectful people, OP, they are just a mismatch for how you do things. They should stay in a hotel next time. But drop the judgement.

+1 where else should they go? Genuinely wondering. I strip the bed and put all dirty stuff together in the laundry, and notify the host.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have learned that everyone has super different ideas of what is and is not appropriate. I’m from the Uk where it’s a given that you strip your bed after you stay somewhere so the host can easily wash your sheets. Virtually none of my us guests do this which are first I thought was beyond rude but now I understand it’s just a cultural difference

In my view, it is extremely rude to strip beds without ***asking the host first.***

When you politely ASK what would be helpful to your host and then LISTEN to the answer, you may learn that some do indeed prefer for the beds to be stripped, and some prefer that you just leave it as-is (but I always neatly make the bed and make sure the room is tidy).

They may have a laundry schedule you don’t know about, or a cleaning service coming on a day you don’t know about, it. They may prefer to have one day of guests being gone to relax before they tackle chores.

ASSuming is rude. ASKING is polite.

+1, my mom just wants guests to leave the sheets on the beds. She hates having a giant pile of laundry after guests leave. She just works her way around, washing the sheets when she is ready to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. These responses are kinda interesting, and thanks for sharing. They seem to be in three camps : 1) you need to expect wear-and-tear because people have different standards, and some live rough; 2) you need to instruct your guests how to meet your standards or hover over them for the quick save. 3) you shouldn’t host.

To me, it’s astonishing that so many would-be visitors struggle with the basics.

Then again, I attended an elite private college and was a RA. I recall that some students thought it was their “right” to tear up the dorm because their parents paid rent. They didn’t seem to understand or want to understand that rent was for reasonable use of the space, not abuse.

I guess I’m cut from different cloth.

Oh my lord. You believe you’re “cut from a different cloth”? You are insufferable, OP.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm pretty much 100% on your side here with the possible exception of the towels. I don't think you are uptight at all. I would not host these people again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm pretty much 100% on your side here with the possible exception of the towels. I don't think you are uptight at all. I would not host these people again.

+2 I don't like getting my house getting damaged by guests and I am on your side OP. I have no opinion on the towels/sheets situation. I rewash all of that stuff anyway. If you are a poster who doesn't care, then good for you. My house is a newly built custom home. If I was to just accept 'wear and tear' from all the people who want to come stay with me, my house would be run down in a matter of a few years. Hang in there OP, I understand your POV. I will say that people having blatant disregard for the property of others doesn't have to do with level of education or socio-economic class. I have a wide array of friends with varying backgrounds, there is no direct link of what type of person does the damaging.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand the problem with putting the towels in with the sheets. Aren’t you going to scoop them all up after the guests leave and put them in the washing machine?

Your guests aren’t horrible, disrespectful people, OP, they are just a mismatch for how you do things. They should stay in a hotel next time. But drop the judgement.

+1 where else should they go? Genuinely wondering. I strip the bed and put all dirty stuff together in the laundry, and notify the host.

When we host, it’s usually close family. They generally will strip the bed. I partly agree with OP, in that I do not like guests to leave a pile of wet towels anywhere. I will either: ask them to hang any wet towels up in the guest bathroom; or, more often, they put wet towels and sheets in laundry room, and then I hang up the wet towels if I’m not doing the laundry that day.