Scientific American on Decline in Sex Across the Board

[Anonymous]

Married couples look at their phones instead of at each other. We are more disconnected than ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think porn does have an impact. For most men they want sex somewhere between a little and a LOT more than women. In my marriage, it takes a herculean effort to get my wife in the mood where she might want to have sex, emphasis on might. With porn so easily available, men can take care of themselves.

I would much prefer sex with a real woman and if I were single I would put the effort in

The effort might not be so herculean if you were to consistently invest in the relationship. That's what my marriage counselor said anyway. He said it was the reason DH and I don't have the issue of low frequency that some other couples do.

I think experience is definitely mixed on this issue. Sometimes good spouses are married to people who just don't want to have much sex, and sometimes bad spouses are married to people who like having sex with them.

I’m sure everybody is different but it’s very rare that somebody’s desire for sex is completely independent of their environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Married couples look at their phones instead of at each other. We are more disconnected than ever.

True.

Social media, which is all a toxic time-suck, has much to do with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Married couples look at their phones instead of at each other. We are more disconnected than ever.

On the one hand, probably. On the other hand, married people not having sex has been a trope since forever.

[Anonymous]

I wish DH would get hooked on porn. Then he would not bother me as much for sex. 2x a week and he is petulant when I turn him down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Married couples look at their phones instead of at each other. We are more disconnected than ever.

On the one hand, probably. On the other hand, married people not having sex has been a trope since forever.

No I think you ask any married couple and one will say we have a great sex life. We do it x amount a week. The other will say our sexy life is bad and we may do it y times in 3 months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH would get hooked on porn. Then he would not bother me as much for sex. 2x a week and he is petulant when I turn him down.

Grant him a hall pass and you won't be "bothered for sex"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH would get hooked on porn. Then he would not bother me as much for sex. 2x a week and he is petulant when I turn him down.

Love women who make this humble brag. You want to see a petulant child turn a woman down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH would get hooked on porn. Then he would not bother me as much for sex. 2x a week and he is petulant when I turn him down.

Grant him a hall pass and you won't be "bothered for sex"

I feel for her DH. He must have no self esteem. Begging for sex only to be turned down. I seriously doubt they are having sex twice a week…bet it’s more like 2 x a year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would think over the long-term, that our obesity rates aren't helping. Especially because it messes with your hormones.

pesticides and hormones in our food supply and water aren't helping, either.

[Anonymous]

I am the woman in the relationship and have the higher drive and I don’t want a hall pass, I just want DH. I desperately need physical intimacy. It feels so weird to have the opposite problem of so many other people! I blame porn and general tiredness. His health is good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am the woman in the relationship and have the higher drive and I don’t want a hall pass, I just want DH. I desperately need physical intimacy. It feels so weird to have the opposite problem of so many other people! I blame porn and general tiredness. His health is good.

I have the normal / not opposite problem: wife rarely interested. Sometimes says ‘just get it over with.”

Took this forums advice and did more housework, dates, encouraged her to have girls night / weekends out, took on even more responsibility for kid raising. Got to my own doctor, followed her advice and I am in the best shape of my life.

Listened to my wife and responded. Renovated the house. Took her on vacays. Encouraged her on every idea she came up with.

Still nope.

Turns out: she is not interested after all I did; she just does not want sex with me or anyone anymore; and she is not happy with her own body/weight after 2 kids (but she doesn’t want to cut back on eating or to do enough hard exercise combined with fewer calories).

Women’s libido crashing in late 40s is a thing, I guess.

[Anonymous]

I also don’t think tw helps either. It was novel when it started, being able to pop away and take care of business any time during the day. But that wore off quickly and now our homes, our places of refuge, are our offices. DH might as well be a coworker and not a spouse. Absence does make the heart grow fonder and I do really hope we start going back to the office. I’d take my occasional TW and AWS schedule before Covid hit over this purgatory any day of the week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH would get hooked on porn. Then he would not bother me as much for sex. 2x a week and he is petulant when I turn him down.

Love women who make this humble brag. You want to see a petulant child turn a woman down.

Well you’re quite the douche bag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish DH would get hooked on porn. Then he would not bother me as much for sex. 2x a week and he is petulant when I turn him down.

Love women who make this humble brag. You want to see a petulant child turn a woman down.

Definitely true. Even the fat ones believe if they hand it to you on a silver platter you should feel lucky. Women turning it down is some type of feminist empowerment, men turning it down is blasphemy.