Scientific American on Decline in Sex Across the Board

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just my n=1 experience, but when I was single about 10 years ago, I had 2 long term boyfriends who had little to zero interest in sex but watched a LOT of porn. I’ve had a couple female friends who also had partners that preferred porn over sex.

I remember 10-15 years ago when people mentioned this they were met with scoffing disbelief that any man would prefer porn over sex. Now everyone recognizes it’s true

yeah, it can't possibly be the women

[Anonymous]

People are getting huge. HUGE, not just 5 lbs. overweight, and it impacts the sex life.

"Almost two-thirds -- 65% -- of obese people in the treatment group reported significant sexual problems; 41% of the nontreatment group cited sexual problems; only 5% of normal-weight people did." "Overweight and obesity may increase the risk of erectile dysfunction (ED) by 30–90% as compared with normal weight subjects. "

The overweight and obese French experienced the same issues, so it's not cultural, it's health related. "BMI and sexual health. There was no difference in sexual dysfunction (lack of sexual desire, arousal, painful intercourse) between obese or overweight women compared with women with a normal BMI (table 4)⇓. Nevertheless, results show a significant trend towards decreasing sexual desire with increasing BMI (P=0.01). Data also show a significant increase in erectile dysfunction with increasing BMI for men (P=0.002) (table 5)⇓. Compared with normal weight men, the odds of often experiencing erectile dysfunction in the past 12 months were 2.58 among obese men (P=0.03) and 2.69 among overweight men (P=0.02)."

40% of America is obese and more than 70% is overweight.

https://www.webmd.com/sex/news/20041129/sexual-problems-common-among-obese-people

https://www.nature.com/articles/ijir20089

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6771291/

https://www.bmj.com/content/340/bmj.c2573

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Scientific American has an interesting interview with an author of a study showing a decline in sexual activity among young and middle aged, single and partnered, whether alone or with someone else. (I didn't see that the study or studies involved in this conversation talked about people over 50.)
Source: https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/people-have-been-having-less-sex-whether-theyre-teenagers-or-40-somethings/

A recent study evaluating what is happening in the U.S. has added to the pile of evidence, showing declines from 2009 to 2018 in all forms of partnered sexual activity .... Between 2009 and 2018, the proportion of adolescents reporting no sexual activity, either alone or with partners, rose from 28.8 percent to 44.2 percent among young men and from 49.5 percent in 2009 to 74 percent among young women. The researchers obtained the self-reported information from the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior and used responses from 4,155 people in 2009 and 4,547 people in 2018. These respondents to the confidential survey ranged in age from 14 to 49 years.

The author figured there were several potential explanations and that just one factor probably wasn't "the reason." But potential factors discussed in the article include social media, video games, increasing acceptability of asexuality, fearfulness about 'rough sex,' socioeconomic declines, and declines in the use of alcohol. The study did not include data since the onset of the pandemic, but the author is asked to speculate on the impact. (She figures it's a mix. More time together at home, but also more time together at home. lol.)

The reason why there are InCels now.
Also, with the increase in women reporting rape, DNA testing to determine rapists, lack of societal shaming of women who are raped and women being careful of being roofied - many men are lacking their usual way of getting sex through coercion, rape and deceit. I also feel that with the availability of sex toys for women, women are less accepting of poor sexual performance of men when it is present with other undesirable traits - poor looks, hygiene, poor provider etc..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Definitely porn and video games. But for the life of me I cannot understand how men would not want the real thing. Maybe it's just plain laziness.

The concept of satisfying a woman sexually may be a recent phenomenon. Women are aware of what an orgasm feels like due to oral, masturbation and sex toys. Women are also watching porn and the disappointemnt with the size of men's cock and stamina in real life is rampant. Earlier, men could just do a bam, slam, thank you ma'am - and not worry about if the woman got off or not. Finally, the obesity epidemic is also playing a part in shrinking the man's appendage and playing havoc with the level of testerastone etc,

In short, men are not up to the task of giving satisfaction to a woman sexually because they are not fit or adept or both. Also, due to the fact that women are financially emancipated, they also have the choice to leave a macho man who is abusive even if he is good in bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just my n=1 experience, but when I was single about 10 years ago, I had 2 long term boyfriends who had little to zero interest in sex but watched a LOT of porn. I’ve had a couple female friends who also had partners that preferred porn over sex.

I remember 10-15 years ago when people mentioned this they were met with scoffing disbelief that any man would prefer porn over sex. Now everyone recognizes it’s true

I'm a man and I suspect that under "ideal" circumstances, most men would prefer the real thing over porn. But real life often falls short of the "ideal." As noted on this forum, some women need to be seduced days ahead of time to be in the mood for sex. Some women won't be in the mood after an argument, or if the husband forgot to do the laundry. Or she might take 45 minutes to orgasm, which is great most of the time, but some nights after a long day you just want to n*t and roll over. In these instances porn might be a "good enough substititute."

Depending on the circumstances (e.g. the guy is single or the woman is not on birth control) there is the risk of pregnancy. Unprotected sex is risky but for many men condoms reduce the pleasure of sex significantly. So even single guys might prefer porn instead of real sex from time to time.

[Anonymous]

The problems arising from porn’s impact on sex IRL will only grow with increasingly realistic VR experiences, lifelike and artificial-intelligence-powered sex dolls, virtual roll-playing experiences, increasingly sophisticated sex toys, etc. Brave new world.

[Anonymous]

I think people just interact less in person than they used to—whether single and looking or partnered. We sit and stare at devices for almost everything in life: friends, work, entertainment, etc… I also think this contributes to the similar epidemics of increased loneliness, obesity, and depression. It’s all interconnected.

The moral of the story is put the phone down and get out there with humans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:me too movement
you need a lawyer to go on a date
American women are just getting so large these days
many seem like they want to be men
such a hassle all around really

Hi, incel!

no, actually from the late 60's and 70's -- a time of free love, man. I feel sorry for the young today.

free love = excuse to harrass and rape women. Grab'em by the pu$$y old grandpa misses the "free love" days.

-52 yr old woman who is glad that the #metoo movement brought out sexual harrassment to the public eye because I also experienced it in the 80s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think people just interact less in person than they used to—whether single and looking or partnered. We sit and stare at devices for almost everything in life: friends, work, entertainment, etc… I also think this contributes to the similar epidemics of increased loneliness, obesity, and depression. It’s all interconnected.

The moral of the story is put the phone down and get out there with humans.

+1 ITA. The basement dwellers playing video games need to get out more and work on your social skills and your physical appearance. Then maybe women will want to date and have sex with you.

[Anonymous]

I'll be honest.. my Os are much more powerful on my own than with DH. I still love him, of course, and want to please him. And I like the intimacy, but in terms of pure O, I can achieve it better on my own.. quicker and more powerful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people are just getting dopamine from other sources (including social media). The diversity of options pushed out other stuff.

Possibly yes. Just a large variety of things to keep us entertained, social media, video games, Netflix.

Video games are a major culprit.

While I do not endorse their draconian crackdown, the Chinese government took measures after their research revealed the wide-spectrum damage video games inflict (ie- not just on people’s sex lives).

[Anonymous]

No one wants to have the conversation about SSRI use!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think people just interact less in person than they used to—whether single and looking or partnered. We sit and stare at devices for almost everything in life: friends, work, entertainment, etc… I also think this contributes to the similar epidemics of increased loneliness, obesity, and depression. It’s all interconnected.

The moral of the story is put the phone down and get out there with humans.

I think this is part of it. I am mid-40s and we had to hone our skills at introducing ourselves and flirting with women we just met. No apps to do it for us. I talk to my younger female friends and they say its rare for a man to approach them at Starbucks, the gym, the grocery store or even at a bar. I am sure it's good in a way for women that they don't deal with the unwanted attention but it also filters out the wanted attention and the interactions that lead to connections and sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:me too movement
you need a lawyer to go on a date
American women are just getting so large these days
many seem like they want to be men
such a hassle all around really

Hi, incel!

no, actually from the late 60's and 70's -- a time of free love, man. I feel sorry for the young today.

Oh, a Boomer man. Figures. Your whole ignorant post makes sense now.

[Anonymous]

Despite my depression and menopausal libido I still masturbate on a fairly regular basis, 2-3 times per week or more. It’s great stress relief and I usually do it near bedtime to aid sleep but sometimes the urge strikes mid day. I appreciate that there is now much more erotic porn available that is appealing to women with my sensibility, so I do tend to use that kind of porn as an enhancement aid most of the time. I haven’t had sex with a penis that has a man attached in more than a decade, entirely by choice - I’m 51 and I’ve experienced too much male BS in my life it’s just not worth it. My orgasms were almost always better by myself anyway, since I started learning my body at around age 11/12. With men I would most often have to masturbate during sex to have an orgasm with my partner.

There is significant research pointing to a precipitous drop in sperm counts and fertility worldwide due to the effect of forever chemicals - PFAS/PFOS. Some scientists believe we are headed toward species extinction because of this issue. I wonder if that issue isn’t also affecting libido. Certainly the prevalence of overweight and obesity very likely is, as accumulation of excess body fat alters hormones and very often to the detriment of libido. And yes many people take psych drugs that alter libido and porn and smartphones aren’t helping either. Meh.