My Master's vs DH's job
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
I can't figure out what to do.
I'm set to start a master's degree program next week. I'm currently a SAHM (we have one child), but I would like to start up the career I had before marriage/kid. Being out of the field a few years has made it tough to find a job again, but the master's will help a lot. Plus, I'm pretty friggin' excited about it. Now DH is saying he thinks I shouldn't do it. His reasons are: -it's a lot of money ($500/credit) -we'd have to find childcare (I have family in the area who can help, plus tons of our neighbors babysit) -he hates the area and his job that he's been at 6 months, and plans to start applying for new jobs out of state once he's been at this job for a year. So doing a 2-3 year masters program interferes with that. -he hadn't said this but I suspect he thinks the career I want isn't "prestigious" enough/pays enough. True, it doesn't pay as much as his job, but it's in the 50-70k range. Other schools offer the same program, but the one here is one of the best. It also has a TON of contacts in the career I want, so it will help me out a lot in the long run. We also don't know how long it will actually take DH to find another job, it could be a couple years. I understand that DH is unhappy here!but I also think this program will benefit us both in the long run. I love this area and don't want to leave but will for him. I just wish he could suck it up a couple more years since after this, we'll be living wherever he wants to. Thoughts? |
Anonymous
|
If you're set to start next week, then isn't this semester already paid for?
Try it for a semester and then re-evaluate. |
Anonymous
|
Op, have you saved for your child's education? completely funded? If not your masters is a luxury you can't afford.
It sounds like you're taking on too much debt for too little return. |
Anonymous
| What is the master's in? |
Anonymous
|
Tell him to suck it up. Maybe he's just getting cold feet right before the change, but be clear with him that you need the masters to be able to get a job in your field, and that your'e willing to move once you're done.
Go forward with your semester. |
Anonymous
+1 I'd be cautious about getting a master's mid-career, other than in a couple disciplines. |
Anonymous
| Op, state the field or we won't believe that you can't get a 50K job without it. |
Anonymous
|
hmm- but you made the sacrifice to SAH while he kept advancing in his career. I'm in a similar situation and my husband is very supportive b/c both adults in the family should have meaningful lives.
I know staying at home to take of your family is seen as a luxury, maybe my perspective is different b/c i come from a family where women didn't have an option to work out of the home when kids were little, but in some ways it is also a sacrifice b/c reentering the job market is difficult and kids are small only for so longhand then what are you supposed to do for the rest of your life? You only have the 'mph' to go to grad school for so long & need time to work to pay it off. You stayed home and took care of the family, now your husband should suck it up at his job for the duration of your masters. you should make sure that you are able to tighten your belt and keep up with some work at home like cooking for the week at home, shopping less etc. . b/c the family is spending $$ on your Masters. I am from an asian immigrant background and know a lot of families who did/do this and it always translated into financial success for the family. Frankly, its even better for your child especially if she is a girl b/c she will see that women are capable of achieving all of their potential in life, its not the 1950s with women having to choose between having a career or having children. I also wouldnt worry about fully funding your childs college education over your own education, that is ridiculous- your kids education is far away, you should fund your retirement & don't buy extras until your student loan is payed off but its not the end of the world if your kid has to take out loans- it is bette than having a mother who feels stunted in her career and life? i am assuming that with this masters you will be able to pay off the loan in some meaningful amount of time by yourself? That you won't be depending on your husband to pay for it but will pay for it out of your own earnings? |
Anonymous
| Get a job |
Anonymous
Agree. Masters are a big waste of money with exceptions for a few industries. They are way too expensive to be used as a tool to jumpstart a career. That said, OPs DH needs to support her getting back into the workforce, it just shouldn't necessarily be via a masters. |
Anonymous
| Depending on the job, no one is going to care where you get the masters. I would go to a lower priced program but go. |
Anonymous
|
I don't think I'd invest lots of $$ in a master's unless I had it available and could pay cash. I recommend that you get a job in your field, even if it's entry level and then you can take classes toward your Masters as you can afford them.
Do not take on debt to get this degree. Use the degree you have to get a job. |
Anonymous
| Ignore the naysayers. Start the program and go from there. You do not need permission to improve your situation in life nor to make yourself more marketable. Doing nothing but SAHM will certainly not improve your job prospects. What a load of crap about how you have fund your kid's education first! Is that just your husband trolling and trying to guilt trip you? Why should you be idle while your husband tries to find himself? What if after a few more months he suddenly likes his new job? What will be his reason to prevent you from pursuing a job, then? I see red flags everywhere, but none are about the education. |
Anonymous
|
It sounds like your husband is getting cold feet about the impending change in lifestyle . You being in school means he's going to have to participate more.
If you aren't enrolled I would think carefully about obtaining such an expensive degree when you won't get much return. Instead I would take one class to refresh my skills, volunteer or find something part time to get my foot in the door reach out to your contacts. |
Anonymous
It depends on the circumstances. I completed my masters program without having my kid's college funds completely funded. Once I was finished I found a new job paying 20k more. 36 credit hours at $545 each = $19,620 + fees and books estimated at $10,800 = $30,420. My investment is paid off in less than two years. After which, I have another 30 years in the work force if I retire at 65 = 600k in added income not accounting for inflation. Or an extra 160k in income by the time my oldest goes to college. ______________________ With that said, I'd be sure that a program has some online classes so you can stay enrolled even if you decide to move outside of the area. |