How to respond when kid gets into school and is Legacy

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The only correct response, is " yeah I know I am lucky to have that added hook on my application. Thank you mom and dad!"

There's no reason to pretend it wasn't helpful or that your kid could have gotten in without your legacy status. It just makes you look small when you try to delude your friends. Your kid should just own that they had the advantage and are grateful and appreciative for it.

Even the historical numbers you rely on show that many legacy applicants could indeed get in without being a legacy, especially the more recent data. The same is not true of most other categories of hooks.

Oh BS just because your kid is not as hard working that's on you.

Legacies get in if they have the grades and test scores.

Or if mommy or daddy buys a building. Which is not that often.

Spare us your stupidity.

My kids were legacies at two different colleges. One was 4 generations. They got in because they did the work. We did not do their college apps. What we did do is teach them how to learn and love learning. They definitely had advantages like tutors during high school if they wanted but getting in that college door they got in on their own. Some of mine came from Public school MOCO and some went to boarding all got in not because of us.

I will not diminish their accomplishments because people do not understand how legacies work.

The point is many kids have the grades and stats this is not unique to your kids. Your kids got in because of legacy.

Many kids may think they have the stats, but it turns out that there 4.0 with “high rigor” is from a school where 20 percent of the kids have the same average due to grade inflation and take the same classes isn’t that impressive.

So only your kids have top rigor from a school with no grade inflation. Got it! Thanks for clarifying. My kids go to a top private school and I see the legacy parents, so full of themselves that their kids are so bright and special while the kids are tutored at every juncture. Just like you think that many 4.0 kids are at grade inflated schools, many of us think legacy kids would not have gotten in without that bump. If your kids are truly bright they would not have applied to schools where they did not have a legacy advantage.

Why would my valedictorian at an elite private with incredible ecs and a 1580 NOT apply to Harvard? To prove a point to some loser on dcum who’s wasted 30 pages working out their issues? I think not.

Fyi, no one thinks your kid is special because they got into a school because of a quota.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only correct response, is " yeah I know I am lucky to have that added hook on my application. Thank you mom and dad!"

There's no reason to pretend it wasn't helpful or that your kid could have gotten in without your legacy status. It just makes you look small when you try to delude your friends. Your kid should just own that they had the advantage and are grateful and appreciative for it.

Even the historical numbers you rely on show that many legacy applicants could indeed get in without being a legacy, especially the more recent data. The same is not true of most other categories of hooks.

Oh BS just because your kid is not as hard working that's on you.

Legacies get in if they have the grades and test scores.

Or if mommy or daddy buys a building. Which is not that often.

Spare us your stupidity.

My kids were legacies at two different colleges. One was 4 generations. They got in because they did the work. We did not do their college apps. What we did do is teach them how to learn and love learning. They definitely had advantages like tutors during high school if they wanted but getting in that college door they got in on their own. Some of mine came from Public school MOCO and some went to boarding all got in not because of us.

I will not diminish their accomplishments because people do not understand how legacies work.

The point is many kids have the grades and stats this is not unique to your kids. Your kids got in because of legacy.

Many kids may think they have the stats, but it turns out that there 4.0 with “high rigor” is from a school where 20 percent of the kids have the same average due to grade inflation and take the same classes isn’t that impressive.

So only your kids have top rigor from a school with no grade inflation. Got it! Thanks for clarifying. My kids go to a top private school and I see the legacy parents, so full of themselves that their kids are so bright and special while the kids are tutored at every juncture. Just like you think that many 4.0 kids are at grade inflated schools, many of us think legacy kids would not have gotten in without that bump. If your kids are truly bright they would not have applied to schools where they did not have a legacy advantage.

Why would my valedictorian at an elite private with incredible ecs and a 1580 NOT apply to Harvard? To prove a point to some loser on dcum who’s wasted 30 pages working out their issues? I think not.

By all means, use the legacy edge to benefit your kid. NO ONE is encouraging your kid to not do this. This has nothing to do with whether legacy gives your kid an edge in admissions. It is the pretending that it doesn't that is annoying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only correct response, is " yeah I know I am lucky to have that added hook on my application. Thank you mom and dad!"

There's no reason to pretend it wasn't helpful or that your kid could have gotten in without your legacy status. It just makes you look small when you try to delude your friends. Your kid should just own that they had the advantage and are grateful and appreciative for it.

Even the historical numbers you rely on show that many legacy applicants could indeed get in without being a legacy, especially the more recent data. The same is not true of most other categories of hooks.

Oh BS just because your kid is not as hard working that's on you.

Legacies get in if they have the grades and test scores.

Or if mommy or daddy buys a building. Which is not that often.

Spare us your stupidity.

My kids were legacies at two different colleges. One was 4 generations. They got in because they did the work. We did not do their college apps. What we did do is teach them how to learn and love learning. They definitely had advantages like tutors during high school if they wanted but getting in that college door they got in on their own. Some of mine came from Public school MOCO and some went to boarding all got in not because of us.

I will not diminish their accomplishments because people do not understand how legacies work.

The point is many kids have the grades and stats this is not unique to your kids. Your kids got in because of legacy.

Many kids may think they have the stats, but it turns out that there 4.0 with “high rigor” is from a school where 20 percent of the kids have the same average due to grade inflation and take the same classes isn’t that impressive.

So only your kids have top rigor from a school with no grade inflation. Got it! Thanks for clarifying. My kids go to a top private school and I see the legacy parents, so full of themselves that their kids are so bright and special while the kids are tutored at every juncture. Just like you think that many 4.0 kids are at grade inflated schools, many of us think legacy kids would not have gotten in without that bump. If your kids are truly bright they would not have applied to schools where they did not have a legacy advantage.

Why would my valedictorian at an elite private with incredible ecs and a 1580 NOT apply to Harvard? To prove a point to some loser on dcum who’s wasted 30 pages working out their issues? I think not.

Fyi, no one thinks your kid is special because they got into a school because of a quota.

As if either me or my kid care about your opinion. You clearly are a bitter person with too much time on their hands whose own kid had disappointing results.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:This is really nuts, if legacy parents really thought it didn't matter their kids could have applied without checking the legacy box/filling in the info, be it double legacy or 4th generation or whatever. They didn't do that because they also know it matters but once admitted they want to pretend otherwise. Just own it and move on

There is no such box on the Harvard application. I already told you that.

Actually a different poster….
Was this thread about Harvard?

Clearly it is about the T5 schools and using historical data from a Harvard lawsuit that is nearly a decade old. Pp is now going off about checking a box that doesn’t exist. Further proof of how out of touch they are with the current application cycle.

Speaking mainly for myself but perhaps others are interested here. Is Harvard no longer collecting data on parents?

They no longer ask whether other family members attended Harvard, which is the “box” pp kept asking about, most other schools still ask.

Do you have a source? Because I'm also curious, and find it plausible, but couldn't find something verifiable from a quick Google search. Unfortunately, I don't think eliminating the box means eliminating the preference. All admissions has to do is run the parent names through the development/alumni relations database.

The application is publicly available.

Thanks. I just found the supplement for the prior year.

https://college.harvard.edu/sites/default/files/2024-08/Harvard_FY_supplement_2024-2025.pdf

They don't ask about parent education specifically, but it looks like the Common App still does. So yes, legacy info will be all there.

I remember this from when I was applying, but it's really odd how much detailed information is requested about parent occupations and whether you're applying for need-based aid. Really hard to pretend you're need blind when you're collecting all this information on the admissions application.

Yes, and the Harvard College website acknowledges an advantage to legacy applicants. It is right on the website.

We’ve been splitting hairs. If you want to claim no legacy advantage, don’t list your parents’ info on the common app.

I actually don’t know why anyone would do this. I wouldn’t. But I wouldn’t have some compulsive need to deny my kid had any possible admissions advantage, either.

[Anonymous]

Just be smart where you apply. If the legacy school fits everything you want in a school, then apply there early. That's a no brainer. But don't be delusional you'll get in based on legacy. All the kids in our friend circle/family circle with legacy to Top 5 have been rejected.

[Anonymous]

People say and think this even with schools that explicitly do not consider legacy. Stop worrying what other people think. Lots of idiots out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just be smart where you apply. If the legacy school fits everything you want in a school, then apply there early. That's a no brainer. But don't be delusional you'll get in based on legacy. All the kids in our friend circle/family circle with legacy to Top 5 have been rejected.

OP was a donor. She’s downplaying how much, but legacy who don’t back it up with checks won’t fare as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only correct response, is " yeah I know I am lucky to have that added hook on my application. Thank you mom and dad!"

There's no reason to pretend it wasn't helpful or that your kid could have gotten in without your legacy status. It just makes you look small when you try to delude your friends. Your kid should just own that they had the advantage and are grateful and appreciative for it.

Even the historical numbers you rely on show that many legacy applicants could indeed get in without being a legacy, especially the more recent data. The same is not true of most other categories of hooks.

Oh BS just because your kid is not as hard working that's on you.

Legacies get in if they have the grades and test scores.

Or if mommy or daddy buys a building. Which is not that often.

Spare us your stupidity.

My kids were legacies at two different colleges. One was 4 generations. They got in because they did the work. We did not do their college apps. What we did do is teach them how to learn and love learning. They definitely had advantages like tutors during high school if they wanted but getting in that college door they got in on their own. Some of mine came from Public school MOCO and some went to boarding all got in not because of us.

I will not diminish their accomplishments because people do not understand how legacies work.

The point is many kids have the grades and stats this is not unique to your kids. Your kids got in because of legacy.

Many kids may think they have the stats, but it turns out that there 4.0 with “high rigor” is from a school where 20 percent of the kids have the same average due to grade inflation and take the same classes isn’t that impressive.

So only your kids have top rigor from a school with no grade inflation. Got it! Thanks for clarifying. My kids go to a top private school and I see the legacy parents, so full of themselves that their kids are so bright and special while the kids are tutored at every juncture. Just like you think that many 4.0 kids are at grade inflated schools, many of us think legacy kids would not have gotten in without that bump. If your kids are truly bright they would not have applied to schools where they did not have a legacy advantage.

Why would my valedictorian at an elite private with incredible ecs and a 1580 NOT apply to Harvard? To prove a point to some loser on dcum who’s wasted 30 pages working out their issues? I think not.

Fyi, no one thinks your kid is special because they got into a school because of a quota.

As if either me or my kid care about your opinion. You clearly are a bitter person with too much time on their hands whose own kid had disappointing results.

You do care because you keep responding to messages trying to convince people about how legacy did not boost your kid's chances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be smart where you apply. If the legacy school fits everything you want in a school, then apply there early. That's a no brainer. But don't be delusional you'll get in based on legacy. All the kids in our friend circle/family circle with legacy to Top 5 have been rejected.

OP was a donor. She’s downplaying how much, but legacy who don’t back it up with checks won’t fare as well.

Double legacies where both have made consistent but smallish contributions for many years matter.

Involvement with the school in other ways (volunteering, interviewing, reunion committees) also matter.

Was either parent also a legacy admit? Now a grandparent and their contributions matter…

No letters etc. from prominent classmates?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only correct response, is " yeah I know I am lucky to have that added hook on my application. Thank you mom and dad!"

There's no reason to pretend it wasn't helpful or that your kid could have gotten in without your legacy status. It just makes you look small when you try to delude your friends. Your kid should just own that they had the advantage and are grateful and appreciative for it.

Even the historical numbers you rely on show that many legacy applicants could indeed get in without being a legacy, especially the more recent data. The same is not true of most other categories of hooks.

Oh BS just because your kid is not as hard working that's on you.

Legacies get in if they have the grades and test scores.

Or if mommy or daddy buys a building. Which is not that often.

Spare us your stupidity.

My kids were legacies at two different colleges. One was 4 generations. They got in because they did the work. We did not do their college apps. What we did do is teach them how to learn and love learning. They definitely had advantages like tutors during high school if they wanted but getting in that college door they got in on their own. Some of mine came from Public school MOCO and some went to boarding all got in not because of us.

I will not diminish their accomplishments because people do not understand how legacies work.

The point is many kids have the grades and stats this is not unique to your kids. Your kids got in because of legacy.

Many kids may think they have the stats, but it turns out that there 4.0 with “high rigor” is from a school where 20 percent of the kids have the same average due to grade inflation and take the same classes isn’t that impressive.

So only your kids have top rigor from a school with no grade inflation. Got it! Thanks for clarifying. My kids go to a top private school and I see the legacy parents, so full of themselves that their kids are so bright and special while the kids are tutored at every juncture. Just like you think that many 4.0 kids are at grade inflated schools, many of us think legacy kids would not have gotten in without that bump. If your kids are truly bright they would not have applied to schools where they did not have a legacy advantage.

Why would my valedictorian at an elite private with incredible ecs and a 1580 NOT apply to Harvard? To prove a point to some loser on dcum who’s wasted 30 pages working out their issues? I think not.

Fyi, no one thinks your kid is special because they got into a school because of a quota.

As if either me or my kid care about your opinion. You clearly are a bitter person with too much time on their hands whose own kid had disappointing results.

You do care because you keep responding to messages trying to convince people about how legacy did not boost your kid's chances.

I’m not sure what’s more unbelievable- that the legacy poster doesn’t care or that you aren’t jealous and bitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only correct response, is " yeah I know I am lucky to have that added hook on my application. Thank you mom and dad!"

There's no reason to pretend it wasn't helpful or that your kid could have gotten in without your legacy status. It just makes you look small when you try to delude your friends. Your kid should just own that they had the advantage and are grateful and appreciative for it.

Even the historical numbers you rely on show that many legacy applicants could indeed get in without being a legacy, especially the more recent data. The same is not true of most other categories of hooks.

Oh BS just because your kid is not as hard working that's on you.

Legacies get in if they have the grades and test scores.

Or if mommy or daddy buys a building. Which is not that often.

Spare us your stupidity.

My kids were legacies at two different colleges. One was 4 generations. They got in because they did the work. We did not do their college apps. What we did do is teach them how to learn and love learning. They definitely had advantages like tutors during high school if they wanted but getting in that college door they got in on their own. Some of mine came from Public school MOCO and some went to boarding all got in not because of us.

I will not diminish their accomplishments because people do not understand how legacies work.

The point is many kids have the grades and stats this is not unique to your kids. Your kids got in because of legacy.

Many kids may think they have the stats, but it turns out that there 4.0 with “high rigor” is from a school where 20 percent of the kids have the same average due to grade inflation and take the same classes isn’t that impressive.

So only your kids have top rigor from a school with no grade inflation. Got it! Thanks for clarifying. My kids go to a top private school and I see the legacy parents, so full of themselves that their kids are so bright and special while the kids are tutored at every juncture. Just like you think that many 4.0 kids are at grade inflated schools, many of us think legacy kids would not have gotten in without that bump. If your kids are truly bright they would not have applied to schools where they did not have a legacy advantage.

Why would my valedictorian at an elite private with incredible ecs and a 1580 NOT apply to Harvard? To prove a point to some loser on dcum who’s wasted 30 pages working out their issues? I think not.

Fyi, no one thinks your kid is special because they got into a school because of a quota.

As if either me or my kid care about your opinion. You clearly are a bitter person with too much time on their hands whose own kid had disappointing results.

You do care because you keep responding to messages trying to convince people about how legacy did not boost your kid's chances.

It's not about whether legacy boosted this or any other kid's chances. It's about how to respond to a rude comment from a classmate. That's it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only correct response, is " yeah I know I am lucky to have that added hook on my application. Thank you mom and dad!"

There's no reason to pretend it wasn't helpful or that your kid could have gotten in without your legacy status. It just makes you look small when you try to delude your friends. Your kid should just own that they had the advantage and are grateful and appreciative for it.

Even the historical numbers you rely on show that many legacy applicants could indeed get in without being a legacy, especially the more recent data. The same is not true of most other categories of hooks.

Oh BS just because your kid is not as hard working that's on you.

Legacies get in if they have the grades and test scores.

Or if mommy or daddy buys a building. Which is not that often.

Spare us your stupidity.

My kids were legacies at two different colleges. One was 4 generations. They got in because they did the work. We did not do their college apps. What we did do is teach them how to learn and love learning. They definitely had advantages like tutors during high school if they wanted but getting in that college door they got in on their own. Some of mine came from Public school MOCO and some went to boarding all got in not because of us.

I will not diminish their accomplishments because people do not understand how legacies work.

The point is many kids have the grades and stats this is not unique to your kids. Your kids got in because of legacy.

Many kids may think they have the stats, but it turns out that there 4.0 with “high rigor” is from a school where 20 percent of the kids have the same average due to grade inflation and take the same classes isn’t that impressive.

So only your kids have top rigor from a school with no grade inflation. Got it! Thanks for clarifying. My kids go to a top private school and I see the legacy parents, so full of themselves that their kids are so bright and special while the kids are tutored at every juncture. Just like you think that many 4.0 kids are at grade inflated schools, many of us think legacy kids would not have gotten in without that bump. If your kids are truly bright they would not have applied to schools where they did not have a legacy advantage.

Why would my valedictorian at an elite private with incredible ecs and a 1580 NOT apply to Harvard? To prove a point to some loser on dcum who’s wasted 30 pages working out their issues? I think not.

Fyi, no one thinks your kid is special because they got into a school because of a quota.

As if either me or my kid care about your opinion. You clearly are a bitter person with too much time on their hands whose own kid had disappointing results.

You do care because you keep responding to messages trying to convince people about how legacy did not boost your kid's chances.

It's not about whether legacy boosted this or any other kid's chances. It's about how to respond to a rude comment from a classmate. That's it.

Amen. These "friends" are uncouth losers. You don't say those things out loud. Low class trash. Good riddance.

[Anonymous]

Don’t tell your friends where your parents went to college.

Don’t tell your friends where you’re applying to college.

Don’t tell your friends when you get in.

If your friends are upset because you got into college and they didn’t, cut them off.

Wait, why is everyone so lonely now? Why is everyone struggling with mental health issues?

It’s a mystery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t tell your friends where your parents went to college.

Don’t tell your friends where you’re applying to college.

Don’t tell your friends when you get in.

If your friends are upset because you got into college and they didn’t, cut them off.

Wait, why is everyone so lonely now? Why is everyone struggling with mental health issues?

It’s a mystery.

Yes, this process is so crazy.

DS is in a similar situation. DH who is the furthest removed from drama simply responded "If it makes them feel better, just acknowledge it and move on"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just be smart where you apply. If the legacy school fits everything you want in a school, then apply there early. That's a no brainer. But don't be delusional you'll get in based on legacy. All the kids in our friend circle/family circle with legacy to Top 5 have been rejected.

+1

Legacy gets the kid a second look. But the kid’s application - grades, test scores, essays, etc - are what get them in.