My kid is in a class with a chair thrower

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

Most people simply can’t afford a private special needs school. It’s not cheap. Fairfax County has, what, 30% FARMS students? Which is on the low side for the big school systems around here, MCPS, PGCPS, and Alexandria City have more. And then there’s the matter of a lot of the private SN schools don’t actually accept kids with serious behavioral challenges in terms of violent behavior. They’re more geared toward kids with learning disabilities, mild ID, and mild-moderate ASD. Sometimes there’s not a ready solution even if you have money to throw at a problem.

OK, but PP's example was a family or two that could afford it. But still wanted to fight the schools. What is with this stubborn resistance at the expense of their kids? They sound like selfish cheap a-holes who aren't really looking out for the child's best interests.

Being able to “afford” something is relative. These are not very wealthy big law families. I’m sure paying this tuition is having ripple effects on their savings, ability to support other children, etc. It seems natural families would want to see what assistance they can get before committing to hundreds of thousands of dollars over the long term to paying for private. That is a humongous sum of money for people.

So what? Lots of people can and do prioritize private school education. Why not these families?

Why not the other families in class?

Because public schools will soon just be the poor and the special needs. Can you not see which way the wind is blowing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

LRE is required by IDEA. It is federal law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

Some of the private special ed schools can only be accessed via placement by a school district. If that sounds ridiculous, welcome to special needs parenting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

LRE is required by IDEA. It is federal law.

Fighting over who should foot the bill while the child languishes in a bad environment is disgusting. The parents who can afford it and choose not to, because of IDEA, have a few screws loose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

You obviously have no idea how much SPED-focused schools cost, and likely grew up in relative wealth. The vast majority of people could never dream of paying for these schools.

Isn’t is crazy that people having kids couldn’t even afford to pay for their school unless it is free.

No it’s not crazy. We have these things called tax dollars that go toward paying for these things called public schools that our government has decided every child has a right to access.

Your line of thinking is that only the very wealthy should have children with us dystopian and frankly horrific. I hope I don’t know anyone like you IRL.

Kids are expensive. School tuition is a drop in the bucket among costs of having kids. I would never assume that the free public school option would work for an individual kid.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:^ and the jerks I am referring to are the parents trying to insist that the children throwing chairs should stay home.

Why shouldn't they? They should be suspended for a certain amount of time to get behavior under control before given another chance.

So what if the parents can't get the behavior under control? Should these kids not get educated?

Violent kids have bigger issues and perhaps should enter full time therapy so they can be addressed properly instead of being ignored in school.

Cool. Want to tell us where to find “full time therapy” and tell me which health insurance plan pays for it? Cause I’m over here trying to find an in-network child psychologist for my kid with availability, and no dice. Surely you have a solution?

You pay for it.

I can’t afford it. The vast majority of people can’t. Full time therapy (like a partial in patient program) can be a hundred thousand dollars private pay, if you can even get a spot. If your family income is that of an average American, say $90k, there is simply no way to make it work. None.

What makes you think the average tax payer can afford to fund it? Also why should they fund your medical bills and not those of parents of children with Cystic Fibrosis or any other hardship?

Are you asking why health insurance should cover health care? Perhaps you’d like to go without yourself? You don’t need that cancer medicine, do you? No chemo for you! Good parents don’t get cancer, after all. They stay healthy so the normal tax payer isn’t inconvenienced!

Actually, if my kid gets cancer, I can't drop her off at school and tell the school the cancer is their problem because its too expensive for me to solve. If my kid gets sick I'm on my own.

Schools don’t take over medical care for kids with mental health issues either. They just provide an education which would happen for a kid with cancer too.

Not true. Schools are expected to control the behavior, which is a symptom of the “illness” and not part of educating the student.

Schools are accommodating disabilities, not providing treatment. A 1:1 aide or smaller class is a tool to help the child access education just like a wheelchair ramp.

The girl who was super violent in my daughter's 4th and 5th grade classroom had a 1:1 aide. The aide's job was to call for help when the student started throwing things while the teacher tried to evacuate the other 25+ students. No one was allowed to touch the child so they had to try and talk her down. It was madness. The next day she'd be in the class just like normal. Eventually they put her in a different class (I think with the 6th graders) and my daughter says she is in her in middle school this year. I have great sympathy for the parents of this girl - raising kids is extremely difficult - especially when your child has problems. It is nearly impossible to get therapy these days, the medications all have weird side effects - it's hard. My friend in New York asked the school to pay for private school for her son that had emotional difficulties and the school worked with her to find an appropriate school. I don't see why this can't be the case in this area as well.

Oh wow.

A good friend of mine has a second grader with a 1:1 aide. If all the aide did was talk him down, there is no way he could be mainstreamed. The aide actually holds him when he tries to throw things. They can also hold his hand on the playground, which they often do.

You can usually talk my son down before his behaviors become physical, but he would benefit from physical interventions. I know some schools and staff members are extremely averse to physical interventions. I'm not sure how much of that is driven by parents versus staff.

And, an individual’s decision to keep themselves safe. Many teachers and aids have been injured from a physical intervention. I don’t know that I’d risk my physical health and safety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

You obviously have no idea how much SPED-focused schools cost, and likely grew up in relative wealth. The vast majority of people could never dream of paying for these schools.

Isn’t is crazy that people having kids couldn’t even afford to pay for their school unless it is free.

No it’s not crazy. We have these things called tax dollars that go toward paying for these things called public schools that our government has decided every child has a right to access.

Your line of thinking is that only the very wealthy should have children with us dystopian and frankly horrific. I hope I don’t know anyone like you IRL.

Kids are expensive. School tuition is a drop in the bucket among costs of having kids. I would never assume that the free public school option would work for an individual kid.

Well aren’t you just a perfect parent. Would you like a prize? Can I get you a cookie?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

You obviously have no idea how much SPED-focused schools cost, and likely grew up in relative wealth. The vast majority of people could never dream of paying for these schools.

Isn’t is crazy that people having kids couldn’t even afford to pay for their school unless it is free.

No it’s not crazy. We have these things called tax dollars that go toward paying for these things called public schools that our government has decided every child has a right to access.

Your line of thinking is that only the very wealthy should have children with us dystopian and frankly horrific. I hope I don’t know anyone like you IRL.

Kids are expensive. School tuition is a drop in the bucket among costs of having kids. I would never assume that the free public school option would work for an individual kid.

Well aren’t you just a perfect parent. Would you like a prize? Can I get you a cookie?

So you agree that parenting choices might be an issue here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

Most people simply can’t afford a private special needs school. It’s not cheap. Fairfax County has, what, 30% FARMS students? Which is on the low side for the big school systems around here, MCPS, PGCPS, and Alexandria City have more. And then there’s the matter of a lot of the private SN schools don’t actually accept kids with serious behavioral challenges in terms of violent behavior. They’re more geared toward kids with learning disabilities, mild ID, and mild-moderate ASD. Sometimes there’s not a ready solution even if you have money to throw at a problem.

OK, but PP's example was a family or two that could afford it. But still wanted to fight the schools. What is with this stubborn resistance at the expense of their kids? They sound like selfish cheap a-holes who aren't really looking out for the child's best interests.

Being able to “afford” something is relative. These are not very wealthy big law families. I’m sure paying this tuition is having ripple effects on their savings, ability to support other children, etc. It seems natural families would want to see what assistance they can get before committing to hundreds of thousands of dollars over the long term to paying for private. That is a humongous sum of money for people.

So what? Lots of people can and do prioritize private school education. Why not these families?

Why not the other families in class?

Because public schools will soon just be the poor and the special needs. Can you not see which way the wind is blowing?

I see this too. Even now, the only decent public schools are the ones with mostly UMC families. There are still SN kids, but nearly the amount the high farms districts have. Which leads to another question: why are The behavioral problems and SN disproportionately high in low income areas? Seems to be more often that not, it is in fact tied to parenting and environment vs an actual medical disability

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

Most people simply can’t afford a private special needs school. It’s not cheap. Fairfax County has, what, 30% FARMS students? Which is on the low side for the big school systems around here, MCPS, PGCPS, and Alexandria City have more. And then there’s the matter of a lot of the private SN schools don’t actually accept kids with serious behavioral challenges in terms of violent behavior. They’re more geared toward kids with learning disabilities, mild ID, and mild-moderate ASD. Sometimes there’s not a ready solution even if you have money to throw at a problem.

OK, but PP's example was a family or two that could afford it. But still wanted to fight the schools. What is with this stubborn resistance at the expense of their kids? They sound like selfish cheap a-holes who aren't really looking out for the child's best interests.

Being able to “afford” something is relative. These are not very wealthy big law families. I’m sure paying this tuition is having ripple effects on their savings, ability to support other children, etc. It seems natural families would want to see what assistance they can get before committing to hundreds of thousands of dollars over the long term to paying for private. That is a humongous sum of money for people.

So what? Lots of people can and do prioritize private school education. Why not these families?

We prefer living indoors for one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

You obviously have no idea how much SPED-focused schools cost, and likely grew up in relative wealth. The vast majority of people could never dream of paying for these schools.

SPED schools cost $80k on the low end. At the high end, if you’re talking residential placement it’s $20k/mo and it’s a 12 mo school year. Most families just don’t have that sitting around. They are not thinking hmm…if we send Joe to private special ed, we won’t be able to take the private jet for our next vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

Most people simply can’t afford a private special needs school. It’s not cheap. Fairfax County has, what, 30% FARMS students? Which is on the low side for the big school systems around here, MCPS, PGCPS, and Alexandria City have more. And then there’s the matter of a lot of the private SN schools don’t actually accept kids with serious behavioral challenges in terms of violent behavior. They’re more geared toward kids with learning disabilities, mild ID, and mild-moderate ASD. Sometimes there’s not a ready solution even if you have money to throw at a problem.

OK, but PP's example was a family or two that could afford it. But still wanted to fight the schools. What is with this stubborn resistance at the expense of their kids? They sound like selfish cheap a-holes who aren't really looking out for the child's best interests.

Being able to “afford” something is relative. These are not very wealthy big law families. I’m sure paying this tuition is having ripple effects on their savings, ability to support other children, etc. It seems natural families would want to see what assistance they can get before committing to hundreds of thousands of dollars over the long term to paying for private. That is a humongous sum of money for people.

So what? Lots of people can and do prioritize private school education. Why not these families?

We prefer living indoors for one.

So you either can't afford it or don't prioritize it. You realize that some people can afford it but won't pay for it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

You obviously have no idea how much SPED-focused schools cost, and likely grew up in relative wealth. The vast majority of people could never dream of paying for these schools.

Isn’t is crazy that people having kids couldn’t even afford to pay for their school unless it is free.

I’m unhappy right now my taxes are being used to educate your kids. My kids are in private. I should get to opt out of paying for public

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

One of the things that you might not realize is that some schools that can handle this type of behavior won’t accept private pay. You need two forms of payment and neither can be you. Examples would be school plus a Medicaid back up or private insurance plus a Medicaid back up. And there aren’t a lot of options that accept really difficult kids. So throwing money at the problem isn’t always an option.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Counties hide behind LRE to act like it’s the legal requirement for a certain child. In reality mainstream classes are just cheaper. Self-contained is way more expensive so they try to keep anyone they can mainstream. Even if the classroom teacher and the sped teacher and the parents agree the placement is not working, the county will fight it. I’ve seen it happen.

Private schools are failing because of this. Parents will not use them and vote to defund them. It is a death spiral.

You know what is also expensive? TJ. But the school board finds the money to help the advanced kids get even more advanced. They found the money for that. So the kids who are just normal are in the classroom with the disruptive kids and the majority go downhill because they don't have the same advocacy power.

What mainstreaming does is turn regular classrooms into special education classrooms, but it is the wrong fit for everyone.

+1

Schools need SPED rooms, but the SPED parents fight it.

Do you know many SPED parents? I have a SN child (non-violent) and have gotten to know a number of parents over the years with kids with issues like absconding from the classroom, violent outbursts, meltdowns, etc. and know multiple families who have fought for special placements for their kids. It’s a battle. It’s frustrating and heartbreaking.

I know 2 families who finally after YEARS got their kids placed in a private school like a PP mentioned. And 2 others who ended up leaving public and footing the bill for a private school on their own (which they’ve admitted they are lucky they can do). But not every family can afford this.

The only parents I know who don’t want special SPED rooms are those whose kids can absolutely be in a mainstream classroom. We shouldn’t be sending kids out of the regular classroom because of minor issues like stimming or difficulty paying attention. Also, SN are so varied that just dumping all the kids with and IEP in a class together makes no sense. One of my kids has speech issues … would you relegate him to a SPED classroom?

Why is there such resistance to pay for private school on their own? Why is the school on the hook for it? Plenty of people choose private schools over public and there's no expectation that someone else foot the bill. Kids only get one shot at school why waste time dithering if you can afford it but are too cheap to pay for the best school your child needs? It's messed up.

You obviously have no idea how much SPED-focused schools cost, and likely grew up in relative wealth. The vast majority of people could never dream of paying for these schools.

Isn’t is crazy that people having kids couldn’t even afford to pay for their school unless it is free.

No it’s not crazy. We have these things called tax dollars that go toward paying for these things called public schools that our government has decided every child has a right to access.

Your line of thinking is that only the very wealthy should have children with us dystopian and frankly horrific. I hope I don’t know anyone like you IRL.

Kids are expensive. School tuition is a drop in the bucket among costs of having kids. I would never assume that the free public school option would work for an individual kid.

this is absolutely delusional. most families don’t have 40-50k to drop on tuition for 13 years.