Videotaped by Friends Husband w/o my consent or knowledge

[Anonymous]

So, I was out of state visiting a friend recently and stayed in her home with her and her husband. Was provided a guest room to sleep in during my stay. Friends marriage was on the rocks already at the point, and has since further deteriorated to the point of divorce.

Yesterday, while my friend was going through her husband's computer to find some financial stuff while he was out of their home, and she came across a file full of pornography. In that file, she also found a video of me changing the guest room of her home while I was staying with her. It appears her husband set up his iPad at a discretion location to film me. I had every expectation of privacy while I was staying in their home and never changed in common room- always a bedroom or bathroom by myself.

Horrified, she immediatley deleted the file, as she thought that was the best way to protect me. However, she checked the trash file on the computer to make sure it was gone, and could not find the file. Nor does she know if the video is being retained on the cloud. Her husband is now out of state until Wednesday and has his computer with him. It is unclear if any evidence of the video still exists, though something in my gut tells me it does.

I do believe my friend is telling me the truth. She was sobbing hysterically while telling me, in part b/c I am 13 weeks pregnant and she feared telling me could cause stress that would harm my baby.

My husband, justifiably, wants to take a bat to this guy's head. However, I am trying to keep him cool until we can know our legal options, if any.

So, if there is anyone on this forum that could advise me on my rights, protections, next steps, I would really, really appreciate it. I have not seen the video myself and am only going off my friend's statement, which I believe to be true.

[Anonymous]

OMG OP, I just want to say I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this. I cannot fathom the level of violation that you feel.

Hugs to you.

[Anonymous]

Wait, he's our of state until Wednesday meaning he is coming back to the home they both live in? As in, not separated or divorced yet?
Hopefully she will get to a divorce lawyer tomorrow, no?

[Anonymous]

What state was it? You need to learn their state laws about this. I'm so sorry, OP.

[Anonymous]

He sounds like a total creep. She should not confront him about all the porn and especially the file she found on you. She needs to move out and file for a separation/divorce before stating the evidence she has against him.

[Anonymous]

Consider filing a police report and trying to get him prosecuted. This is like that rabbi in Georgetown who filmed women changing and bathing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Consider filing a police report and trying to get him prosecuted. This is like that rabbi in Georgetown who filmed women changing and bathing.

Exactly.

[Anonymous]

He probably did it to everyone staying there. Children too.

[Anonymous]

About how old are your friend's kids, OP?

[Anonymous]

Honestly, I would say pursuing a legal case might actually be more stressful for you in this pregnancy, than finding out what happened.

I think the most important thing is she divorces this obvious creep.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Troll

I don't think so. I'm sorry this happened to you, OP. No words of advice, however, except that your friend should retain the best divorce lawyer she can afford and use the porn to sink him.

I can think of ways to wreak revenge on this guy, none of them legal.

+1000 Between your girlfriend's lawyer and your own legal recourse, you guys can cripple that bastard. Take care of yourself and your pregnancy, OP. So glad that your girlfriend gave you a heads up and hopefully you can put the breaks on the violated recordings.

Unfortunately, this is something that more and more people are having to deal with due to covert web cams and home spy cameras and just overall cellphone videotaping by people who are up to no good. There are some warped sickos out there.

[Anonymous]

OP here. My friend told her husband in the past few hours that she found the video of me on his computer and sent it to me to do as I please. Which isn't true and I wish she had not done that. So now the POS Husband now is texting me and trying to explain things. My husband and I of course have now blocked his number and his Facebook. But this is seriously upsetting to me and stressing me out- not good when I'm pregnant.

[Anonymous]

So sorry you are going through this. Get a lawyer and contact the FBI and let them know that this guy is videotaping without consent. Sounds callous but focus on yourself here and not your friend. You may want to talk to a therapist about this violation against your person. I'm sure you are feeling pretty freaked out.

Seriously this is bigger than I am sure this POS guy expects and he can do jail time.

[Anonymous]

Call the police.

[Anonymous]

Things are beginning to unravel now with your friend who is antagonizing her POS husband. Technically you should have notified the authorities using the video as evidence.

The POS husband will probably try and beg you not to pursue this. You should still at least discuss with authorities or seek legal advice just in case some video is still "out there" so that they can halt it.

Don't mean to be blunt considering your condition, but this is kind of serious.