How often and bad is this obsession at clubs and teams?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a DS on a "high level" travel team and had a problem with the following:

Players not coming to practice during the week; showing up and starting games.

Sons of the assistant coaches. One was a pretty good player, but loved to hoof the ball at the goal from 35 yards out. He'd do this 8-10 times in a game. Doesn't work after U13, buddy. Head coach wouldn't say a word. Son of the other assistant was a big, strong kid who could defend well, but if he won the ball he would immediately pass it to someone wearing a different color shirt. Like, 18 out of 20 times. Even random passes should have better odds than that.

The better players will get treated differently--more playing time, more leeway to make mistakes, etc. No big deal. But it's doing EVERYONE a disservice, including those talented players, if the coach doesn't hold them to some kind of universal minimum standard.

We left that travel team after U14. 2 years later, 80% of the team is still together, same coach. They've gotten steadily worse.

Oh, that's a big problem. The "star" kids make mistake after mistake, taking poor shots when a teammate is wide open or even getting unnecessary fouls. The a bench player comes in and immediately gets yanked as soon as he loses the ball.

A lot of coaches in the area also only see 'activity' over "efficiency".

I can't tell you how many Coaches love the kid that 'hussles', runs around with a chicken with his head cutoff, yet produces literally NOTHING.

They don't notice the kid completing over 90% of his passes that knows when to run vs when to dribble, when to pass vs when to dribble. They like the energizer ineffective bunny. BTW, this is a trait of U.S. soccer. Bradley was king of this mode of play.

Our striker is like this. He plays the entire game and has almost zero completions and is always b*tching at every other player. U16. The Coach loves his 'drive'. Ummm---he dribbles into the ground over and over and over...and yeah he can run fast--but doesn't do sh*t.

things must have changed since I was that age, I'd expect a kid like that to spend most of practices and scrimmages on his back

Oh..he does!! It doesn't change his playing time or love the Coach has for him. Mind-boggling. It does piss off every teammate though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid teams utilize their most talented players. You people are idiots

And this does not stop at kids level. I played soccer to quite a high level as a holding midfielder and my job was to break up the opposition attack, win the ball, and get it to one of the more creative players on our team.

My kid is only little but funnily enough ends up playing this role even though I am not aware that his coach has asked him to. My kid does it well, loves doing it, and gets lots of game time.

Not everyone can be the goal scoring superstar.

Then when the recruiting age comes you regret that your kid never ever learned other positions. Your kid has not the guts to do a direct kick or a corner kick because he was stuck in one single position.

YEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They stunt development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid teams utilize their most talented players. You people are idiots

And this does not stop at kids level. I played soccer to quite a high level as a holding midfielder and my job was to break up the opposition attack, win the ball, and get it to one of the more creative players on our team.

My kid is only little but funnily enough ends up playing this role even though I am not aware that his coach has asked him to. My kid does it well, loves doing it, and gets lots of game time.

Not everyone can be the goal scoring superstar.

Then when the recruiting age comes you regret that your kid never ever learned other positions. Your kid has not the guts to do a direct kick or a corner kick because he was stuck in one single position.

YEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They stunt development.

We have moved Clubs and forced our kids into positions they are uncomfortable with solely to get this versatility. Some Coaches will NOT develop kids all over the field when they are young...in fact, most of them won't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid teams utilize their most talented players. You people are idiots

And this does not stop at kids level. I played soccer to quite a high level as a holding midfielder and my job was to break up the opposition attack, win the ball, and get it to one of the more creative players on our team.

My kid is only little but funnily enough ends up playing this role even though I am not aware that his coach has asked him to. My kid does it well, loves doing it, and gets lots of game time.

Not everyone can be the goal scoring superstar.

Then when the recruiting age comes you regret that your kid never ever learned other positions. Your kid has not the guts to do a direct kick or a corner kick because he was stuck in one single position.

I should have said he often plays this role. He is more than comfortable doing the other things you describe and is well coached in and comfortable playing any position except goalkeeper. I guess we are lucky to have a good club and coach.

But a lot of parents in this area have an attitude that unless their kid is scoring goals every week then it is a disaster and they need to complain to coach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid teams utilize their most talented players. You people are idiots

And this does not stop at kids level. I played soccer to quite a high level as a holding midfielder and my job was to break up the opposition attack, win the ball, and get it to one of the more creative players on our team.

My kid is only little but funnily enough ends up playing this role even though I am not aware that his coach has asked him to. My kid does it well, loves doing it, and gets lots of game time.

Not everyone can be the goal scoring superstar.

Then when the recruiting age comes you regret that your kid never ever learned other positions. Your kid has not the guts to do a direct kick or a corner kick because he was stuck in one single position.

I should have said he often plays this role. He is more than comfortable doing the other things you describe and is well coached in and comfortable playing any position except goalkeeper. I guess we are lucky to have a good club and coach.

But a lot of parents in this area have an attitude that unless their kid is scoring goals every week then it is a disaster and they need to complain to coach.

And there are those that would like their kid that has been playing the entire game at Center D since age 10---to frickin' get a chance somewhere else. "Oh but when we take him out we get scored on'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid teams utilize their most talented players. You people are idiots

And this does not stop at kids level. I played soccer to quite a high level as a holding midfielder and my job was to break up the opposition attack, win the ball, and get it to one of the more creative players on our team.

My kid is only little but funnily enough ends up playing this role even though I am not aware that his coach has asked him to. My kid does it well, loves doing it, and gets lots of game time.

Not everyone can be the goal scoring superstar.

Then when the recruiting age comes you regret that your kid never ever learned other positions. Your kid has not the guts to do a direct kick or a corner kick because he was stuck in one single position.

I should have said he often plays this role. He is more than comfortable doing the other things you describe and is well coached in and comfortable playing any position except goalkeeper. I guess we are lucky to have a good club and coach.

But a lot of parents in this area have an attitude that unless their kid is scoring goals every week then it is a disaster and they need to complain to coach.

And there are those that would like their kid that has been playing the entire game at Center D since age 10---to frickin' get a chance somewhere else. "Oh but when we take him out we get scored on'.

You should find a team with a better balance and move. That is not the kid's fault. It's on the "good coach."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a DS on a "high level" travel team and had a problem with the following:

Players not coming to practice during the week; showing up and starting games.

Sons of the assistant coaches. One was a pretty good player, but loved to hoof the ball at the goal from 35 yards out. He'd do this 8-10 times in a game. Doesn't work after U13, buddy. Head coach wouldn't say a word. Son of the other assistant was a big, strong kid who could defend well, but if he won the ball he would immediately pass it to someone wearing a different color shirt. Like, 18 out of 20 times. Even random passes should have better odds than that.

The better players will get treated differently--more playing time, more leeway to make mistakes, etc. No big deal. But it's doing EVERYONE a disservice, including those talented players, if the coach doesn't hold them to some kind of universal minimum standard.

We left that travel team after U14. 2 years later, 80% of the team is still together, same coach. They've gotten steadily worse.

Oh, that's a big problem. The "star" kids make mistake after mistake, taking poor shots when a teammate is wide open or even getting unnecessary fouls. The a bench player comes in and immediately gets yanked as soon as he loses the ball.

A lot of coaches in the area also only see 'activity' over "efficiency".

I can't tell you how many Coaches love the kid that 'hussles', runs around with a chicken with his head cutoff, yet produces literally NOTHING.

They don't notice the kid completing over 90% of his passes that knows when to run vs when to dribble, when to pass vs when to dribble. They like the energizer ineffective bunny. BTW, this is a trait of U.S. soccer. Bradley was king of this mode of play.

PP, I don't know if you are a coach or not, but one of my kids is the accurate/skill move the ball player, rather than the run around everywhere player. It's so hard in this area, because coaches tend to not appreciate kids like my son and even worse, for their skills to bear fruit, they need to be on a certain type of team where there is some level of soccer IQ. It's frustrating, because if you understand the game, it's not that much fun to play on a team where no one is where you expect them to be, where no one makes a run, and when players either play the long ball every time or dribble into a crowd.

1. Go to a program where the coaches appreciate this type of player and recruit other similar players which allows for the necessary style of play to work.
2. Challenge your son to be both accurate and energetic. Think Firmino: incredible technical ability but also works harder than anyone else on the team.

If only #1 were possible. Ha! We have only been one place in the 10-years my kids have been playing that can be described this way---but it is just too far logistically now that they are older.

Where (approx) do you live?

[Anonymous]

They keep score for a reason. Standings too. Tournaments cups are given to the winners not the most technical. I hear everyones complaints but even if you work to develop virtually all these kids to their maximum. They will almost all fall in the below average for a soccer player in the grand scheme of things. Everyone loves the game but the facts are in the USA soccer is thought of as the sport your less athletic kid has a chance at. Not tall enough or athletic enough for basketball. Not big enough or strong enough for football . Soccer is that great equalizer just teach them to be technical learn possession play, etc. The fact remains the 1% of soccer players that make it to the pros are exceptional athletes first. Which make becoming a technical player that much easier. Just enjoy you kids being competitive and learning life lessons in the process. Let your kids enjoy the process no matter how far it takes them. It may end at U10 or U19 but its their journey and they are the talent you are just the supporting cast know your role and stay in your lane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They keep score for a reason. Standings too. Tournaments cups are given to the winners not the most technical. I hear everyones complaints but even if you work to develop virtually all these kids to their maximum. They will almost all fall in the below average for a soccer player in the grand scheme of things. Everyone loves the game but the facts are in the USA soccer is thought of as the sport your less athletic kid has a chance at. Not tall enough or athletic enough for basketball. Not big enough or strong enough for football . Soccer is that great equalizer just teach them to be technical learn possession play, etc. The fact remains the 1% of soccer players that make it to the pros are exceptional athletes first. Which make becoming a technical player that much easier. Just enjoy you kids being competitive and learning life lessons in the process. Let your kids enjoy the process no matter how far it takes them. It may end at U10 or U19 but its their journey and they are the talent you are just the supporting cast know your role and stay in your lane.

Honest and brutal but right on the money. Most kids understand this intuitively and either adjust or not. And for all the shots people are taking at top kids on this particular thread, they are well aware at a young age of the burden of expectations placed on them by teammates and even other parents. It is helpful to support them appropriately. That is a crucial part of any team sport and any business where you have clearly more talented people on your team. Rec is a perfectly good option if you are looking for something less competitive (and no, I don’t mean that perjoratively). My son plays rec basketball for this very reason and both he and his parents enjoy it as much and perhaps more than his travel soccer team, which is pressure filled and full of kids vying to be top dog.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They keep score for a reason. Standings too. Tournaments cups are given to the winners not the most technical. I hear everyones complaints but even if you work to develop virtually all these kids to their maximum. They will almost all fall in the below average for a soccer player in the grand scheme of things. Everyone loves the game but the facts are in the USA soccer is thought of as the sport your less athletic kid has a chance at. Not tall enough or athletic enough for basketball. Not big enough or strong enough for football . Soccer is that great equalizer just teach them to be technical learn possession play, etc. The fact remains the 1% of soccer players that make it to the pros are exceptional athletes first. Which make becoming a technical player that much easier. Just enjoy you kids being competitive and learning life lessons in the process. Let your kids enjoy the process no matter how far it takes them. It may end at U10 or U19 but its their journey and they are the talent you are just the supporting cast know your role and stay in your lane.

WOW !!!!! This is the most accurate post ever on DCUM. Please use this as a reference for all soccer parents across the country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They keep score for a reason. Standings too. Tournaments cups are given to the winners not the most technical. I hear everyones complaints but even if you work to develop virtually all these kids to their maximum. They will almost all fall in the below average for a soccer player in the grand scheme of things. Everyone loves the game but the facts are in the USA soccer is thought of as the sport your less athletic kid has a chance at. Not tall enough or athletic enough for basketball. Not big enough or strong enough for football . Soccer is that great equalizer just teach them to be technical learn possession play, etc. The fact remains the 1% of soccer players that make it to the pros are exceptional athletes first. Which make becoming a technical player that much easier. Just enjoy you kids being competitive and learning life lessons in the process. Let your kids enjoy the process no matter how far it takes them. It may end at U10 or U19 but its their journey and they are the talent you are just the supporting cast know your role and stay in your lane.

Honest and brutal but right on the money. Most kids understand this intuitively and either adjust or not. And for all the shots people are taking at top kids on this particular thread, they are well aware at a young age of the burden of expectations placed on them by teammates and even other parents. It is helpful to support them appropriately. That is a crucial part of any team sport and any business where you have clearly more talented people on your team. Rec is a perfectly good option if you are looking for something less competitive (and no, I don’t mean that perjoratively). My son plays rec basketball for this very reason and both he and his parents enjoy it as much and perhaps more than his travel soccer team, which is pressure filled and full of kids vying to be top dog.

Umm yeah, except that none of the players on the teams we are talking about are going to make it to the pros or the national team. None. And regardless, that is no reason for coaches to mistreat children. Just as teachers aren't permitted to write off "stupid kids," coaches should coach the players in front of them. End of story.
]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They keep score for a reason. Standings too. Tournaments cups are given to the winners not the most technical. I hear everyones complaints but even if you work to develop virtually all these kids to their maximum. They will almost all fall in the below average for a soccer player in the grand scheme of things. Everyone loves the game but the facts are in the USA soccer is thought of as the sport your less athletic kid has a chance at. Not tall enough or athletic enough for basketball. Not big enough or strong enough for football . Soccer is that great equalizer just teach them to be technical learn possession play, etc. The fact remains the 1% of soccer players that make it to the pros are exceptional athletes first. Which make becoming a technical player that much easier. Just enjoy you kids being competitive and learning life lessons in the process. Let your kids enjoy the process no matter how far it takes them. It may end at U10 or U19 but its their journey and they are the talent you are just the supporting cast know your role and stay in your lane.

Honest and brutal but right on the money. Most kids understand this intuitively and either adjust or not. And for all the shots people are taking at top kids on this particular thread, they are well aware at a young age of the burden of expectations placed on them by teammates and even other parents. It is helpful to support them appropriately. That is a crucial part of any team sport and any business where you have clearly more talented people on your team. Rec is a perfectly good option if you are looking for something less competitive (and no, I don’t mean that perjoratively). My son plays rec basketball for this very reason and both he and his parents enjoy it as much and perhaps more than his travel soccer team, which is pressure filled and full of kids vying to be top dog.

Umm yeah, except that none of the players on the teams we are talking about are going to make it to the pros or the national team. None. And regardless, that is no reason for coaches to mistreat children. Just as teachers aren't permitted to write off "stupid kids," coaches should coach the players in front of them. End of story.
]

PP. I totally agree with this. But again, not everybody is at TJ, or in AP or AAP. That doesn’t mean you are written off. It just means you are in a different class or section. That’s not abusive. And recognizing and supporting stronger players on a team is simply the right thing to do in most situations at any level. It is usually reciprocated. I don’t think this is really a controversial idea at all in competitive sports. Of course everybody should be treated with respect and dignity, and diva behavior should be discouraged. But pretending kids have equal strengths in particular sports is pure fantasy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They keep score for a reason. Standings too. Tournaments cups are given to the winners not the most technical. I hear everyones complaints but even if you work to develop virtually all these kids to their maximum. They will almost all fall in the below average for a soccer player in the grand scheme of things. Everyone loves the game but the facts are in the USA soccer is thought of as the sport your less athletic kid has a chance at. Not tall enough or athletic enough for basketball. Not big enough or strong enough for football . Soccer is that great equalizer just teach them to be technical learn possession play, etc. The fact remains the 1% of soccer players that make it to the pros are exceptional athletes first. Which make becoming a technical player that much easier. Just enjoy you kids being competitive and learning life lessons in the process. Let your kids enjoy the process no matter how far it takes them. It may end at U10 or U19 but its their journey and they are the talent you are just the supporting cast know your role and stay in your lane.

Honest and brutal but right on the money. Most kids understand this intuitively and either adjust or not. And for all the shots people are taking at top kids on this particular thread, they are well aware at a young age of the burden of expectations placed on them by teammates and even other parents. It is helpful to support them appropriately. That is a crucial part of any team sport and any business where you have clearly more talented people on your team. Rec is a perfectly good option if you are looking for something less competitive (and no, I don’t mean that perjoratively). My son plays rec basketball for this very reason and both he and his parents enjoy it as much and perhaps more than his travel soccer team, which is pressure filled and full of kids vying to be top dog.

Umm yeah, except that none of the players on the teams we are talking about are going to make it to the pros or the national team. None. And regardless, that is no reason for coaches to mistreat children. Just as teachers aren't permitted to write off "stupid kids," coaches should coach the players in front of them. End of story.
]

PP. I totally agree with this. But again, not everybody is at TJ, or in AP or AAP. That doesn’t mean you are written off. It just means you are in a different class or section. That’s not abusive. And recognizing and supporting stronger players on a team is simply the right thing to do in most situations at any level. It is usually reciprocated. I don’t think this is really a controversial idea at all in competitive sports. Of course everybody should be treated with respect and dignity, and diva behavior should be discouraged. But pretending kids have equal strengths in particular sports is pure fantasy.

I agree with you too. There is realistic placement, and there is cruelty. I was the PP who mentioned my kid getting cut out of a picture posted on social media so that it would feature the club's star. That's cruel. It's particularly cruel when the star scored two goals off of my kid's amazing passes. I have no problem with realistic assessments and communicating about the appropriate level of play. But there is no excuse for freezing kids out, not telling them why they aren't playing, or not playing kids at all. My not super fast kid has always been first off the bench because he's a great playmaker, so this isn't just a person issue for me. I've been to away tournaments on several occasions where a family paid for a hotel room and the kid did not play one minute of any of 3-4 games. That is cruel and inexcusable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP is the parent that says the players don’t pass the ball to my kid

OP didn’t even state a position, his kids are good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They keep score for a reason. Standings too. Tournaments cups are given to the winners not the most technical. I hear everyones complaints but even if you work to develop virtually all these kids to their maximum. They will almost all fall in the below average for a soccer player in the grand scheme of things. Everyone loves the game but the facts are in the USA soccer is thought of as the sport your less athletic kid has a chance at. Not tall enough or athletic enough for basketball. Not big enough or strong enough for football . Soccer is that great equalizer just teach them to be technical learn possession play, etc. The fact remains the 1% of soccer players that make it to the pros are exceptional athletes first. Which make becoming a technical player that much easier. Just enjoy you kids being competitive and learning life lessons in the process. Let your kids enjoy the process no matter how far it takes them. It may end at U10 or U19 but its their journey and they are the talent you are just the supporting cast know your role and stay in your lane.

And yet American sports are not particularly popular around the world. Perhaps we just are not good enough at the worlds most popular game and so we choose to good at what we can be good at.

I mean you can't train to be 6'9" forward or a 6'5" 350 pound lineman. One is born with the traits to become that. Soccer requires training as well as god given athleticism. American sports require the athletes to first and foremost be physical freaks to even compete. That is far more limiting to most kids than the opportunity to play soccer.

If you're a big, fat strong kid, well you can play football and you can decide to play football as late as your Junior year and still be good at football. That is not an option for soccer. One cannot decide in their Junior year to jsut try it out and succeed.