Why do so many people not do their spouse’s laundry?

[Anonymous]

We have separate hampers - it’s just easier for me to do my own since I know which items need to lay flat or line dry, and DH has ruined some cashmere in the past and knows to keep his hands off His laundry is less delicate so I move it ahead if I need the washer or whatever.

We split the kids clothes equally - whoever notices they are out of shorts/shirts/etc. throws in a load. We have them help with their own clothes, putting in the soap, putting things away. They are 3 and 5 and I have high hopes that in a few years they will do it all on their own!

DH takes care of changing and washing all bedding. I fold and put back in the linen closet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find this thread so funny. It never would occur to me that my husband and I would do our own laundry. We have four people living in the house, two teenagers and two adults. Each and every one of us does all of the laundry when it’s our turn. So when it’s my turn I do everyone’s laundry and same with everybody else in the house.

I would never in a million years want my teen sons doing my laundry and folding my thong underwear!

Nope two adults, two teens, 4 hampers. Everyone does own laundry. DH does towels/rags, I do sheets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Do you guys keep separate racks of dirty dishes and each run the dishwasher for your own dishes too? LMAO. Each cook your own meals? Do you each shower in one half of the shower and clean only your half? Ridiculous

No, it wouldn’t make sense to run one person’s few dishes through a cycle in the dishwasher. One person’s laundry, however, can easily fill up the washing machine. I’m confused that you think it’s so utterly bizarre for an adult to be able to handle their own chores around the house?

We wash our clothes weekly, and both of our sets of clothes fill up one washer load for colors and one washer load for whites. Sometimes she does the laundry, sometimes I do. I'm confused that you're confused that we don't all split the house down the middle on everything, as evidenced by your statement that "an adult shoudl be able to handle their OWN chores." Just what are your OWN chores when you share a house, a table, a bed, a life? Bizarre thinking! So glad I dodged a bullet not married to 90% of people on DCUM

[Anonymous]

10:04 If I had teen girls I wouldn't want them folding my underwear either. Besides, that's a ton of laundry for one person to take on - no thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Do you guys keep separate racks of dirty dishes and each run the dishwasher for your own dishes too? LMAO. Each cook your own meals? Do you each shower in one half of the shower and clean only your half? Ridiculous

No, it wouldn’t make sense to run one person’s few dishes through a cycle in the dishwasher. One person’s laundry, however, can easily fill up the washing machine. I’m confused that you think it’s so utterly bizarre for an adult to be able to handle their own chores around the house?

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s something SAHMs say so they can feel like their husband is doing something around the house.

Personally it’s so much more efficient for one spouse to do the family laundry, one spouse to make lunches, etc. You can trade off tasks or weeks but everyone doing everything individually is not very productive.

And yet op says her nanny does the kids clothes. So WOHMs feel like their nannies are doing something around the house? It just seems weirdly ironic to say it’s somehow superior to do your spouse’s laundry, when someone else is taking care of it for your kids.

The answer to this is obvious, so you must not be very bright. Guessing you’re a SAHM?

[Anonymous]

I'll run them through the washer/dryer *if* they're in the hamper. I'm not picking up clothes off the floor, even my 3 year old knows to put clothes in the hamper.

I also don't fold, because A. That's what takes the most time and B. Even if I do fold them, 99% of the time they end up shoved in a drawer or piled on the dresser and get wrinkled anyway. Not worth my time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Do you guys keep separate racks of dirty dishes and each run the dishwasher for your own dishes too? LMAO. Each cook your own meals? Do you each shower in one half of the shower and clean only your half? Ridiculous

No, it wouldn’t make sense to run one person’s few dishes through a cycle in the dishwasher. One person’s laundry, however, can easily fill up the washing machine. I’m confused that you think it’s so utterly bizarre for an adult to be able to handle their own chores around the house?

We wash our clothes weekly, and both of our sets of clothes fill up one washer load for colors and one washer load for whites. Sometimes she does the laundry, sometimes I do. I'm confused that you're confused that we don't all split the house down the middle on everything, as evidenced by your statement that "an adult shoudl be able to handle their OWN chores." Just what are your OWN chores when you share a house, a table, a bed, a life? Bizarre thinking! So glad I dodged a bullet not married to 90% of people on DCUM

Where did I say my household splits ALL chores down the middle? If you do 100% of things communally and it works for you guys, that’s great. I do my own laundry, make my own breakfast, and clean up after any messes I make, etc. instead of expecting my spouse to do it for me. And it’s kind of hard to take you seriously when you have this big, dramatic reaction to the concept of a person doing their own load of laundry, like it’s just the absolute most ridiculous thing you’ve ever heard of.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In reading multiple threads I have heard a very common theme of people not doing their spouse’s laundry. What’s the thinking in that? Do you have separate hampers for each other’s clothes, or do you have to sort the dirty laundry to find yours? Do you find their laundry gross and that’s why you don’t do it? I do all the adult laundry in the house (the nanny does the kids’ laundry, well, usually she does, she’s not working now) and it would never occur to me to only do my half (or portion, not sure who has more but it may be my spouse). Granted it takes longer for me to fold it all and put it away than it would if I just did mine, but it seems inefficient to me to do it separately. So I’m just curious as to why this is a thing for so many people. Clearly my spouse can do laundry, we both did it before we got married, and they will sometimes do it now, but it literally never occurred to me to have us each only do our own.

I do mine and the kids’. That’s a crap ton of laundry. DH is a big boy and can do his own. I don’t want him doing mine.

[Anonymous]

Because he's a grown man and not a child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s something SAHMs say so they can feel like their husband is doing something around the house.

Personally it’s so much more efficient for one spouse to do the family laundry, one spouse to make lunches, etc. You can trade off tasks or weeks but everyone doing everything individually is not very productive.

And yet op says her nanny does the kids clothes. So WOHMs feel like their nannies are doing something around the house? It just seems weirdly ironic to say it’s somehow superior to do your spouse’s laundry, when someone else is taking care of it for your kids.

The answer to this is obvious, so you must not be very bright. Guessing you’re a SAHM?

WAHM with an Ivy League degree from a school you only wish your kids could get into. Suck it, sister.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s something SAHMs say so they can feel like their husband is doing something around the house.

Personally it’s so much more efficient for one spouse to do the family laundry, one spouse to make lunches, etc. You can trade off tasks or weeks but everyone doing everything individually is not very productive.

And yet op says her nanny does the kids clothes. So WOHMs feel like their nannies are doing something around the house? It just seems weirdly ironic to say it’s somehow superior to do your spouse’s laundry, when someone else is taking care of it for your kids.

The answer to this is obvious, so you must not be very bright. Guessing you’re a SAHM?

Not guessing - you are an a$$.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have separate hampers, yes. But we also do our laundry differently. My husband doesn’t use fabric softener, dries his clothes on a different setting, and even folds his clothes differently. Like another PP said, I wouldn’t trust him to know how to treat my different fabrics or delicates. Plus, it’s usually just something an adult handles on their own? Like, making their own breakfast or lunch...I don’t generally do that for my husband either.

+1

We each have our own hamper and do our own laundry. I do not trust my husband to handle my clothing.

That said, if it’s convenient for me to do his laundry, then I do it. It’s not a point of contention at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s something SAHMs say so they can feel like their husband is doing something around the house.

Personally it’s so much more efficient for one spouse to do the family laundry, one spouse to make lunches, etc. You can trade off tasks or weeks but everyone doing everything individually is not very productive.

And yet op says her nanny does the kids clothes. So WOHMs feel like their nannies are doing something around the house? It just seems weirdly ironic to say it’s somehow superior to do your spouse’s laundry, when someone else is taking care of it for your kids.

The answer to this is obvious, so you must not be very bright. Guessing you’re a SAHM?

WAHM with an Ivy League degree from a school you only wish your kids could get into. Suck it, sister.

No one believes you anonymous internet troll.

[Anonymous]

Everyone in my house does their own (kids started at about age 10).