IL’s kid is a nightmare and I don’t want him back at our house.

[Anonymous]

IL’s kid? Isn’t this your niece or nephew? You sound lovely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 3 year old is very rambunctious. When we visit a relative it’s always rough because it’s not kid friendly and they like to follow around the pets too. What I do though is follow them around making sure their behavior is appropriate and then I can grab their hand if they’re about to touch a statue or similar. I can rarely sit down and relax and it makes it exhausting for me but I do what has to be done to make sure they’re being appropriate.

I've got 2 boys and that's always what we did, too. I would never have just kicked back in someone else's home and allowed my kids to run around like holy terrors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I 100% get it’s annoying and with a newborn your protection instincts are in sicko mode so this all seemed way worse than it was. A 4 year old boy is a rowdy creature as you’ll discover when your newborn is this age. He was bored in a not kid friendly apartment and has no idea sticking his hands in a baby’s face isn’t okay. Yes your SIL should’ve corralled him better but he doesn’t sound THAT bad or abnormal.

The boy sounds pretty normal. His parents sound like permissive jerks. That’s reason enough not to have them over for a long time. Eventually the boy will e old enough to have a better sense of what’s appropriate behavior, even if his parents refuse to show him.

His teachers at school will eventually curb his behavior. He'll also learn how to behave in other people's houses when he is on play dates and the host parents gently guide him - "No, Ben, please do not jump on our furniture or I'll have to call your mom", "Please do not flush toys down our toilet!", "If you would like a snack please ask before you go into our pantry", "Please stay out of the rooms with closed doors".....fun times.

Until then, he'll continue to be a terror unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok, if the mother of this holy terror has to ask “is his behavior ok”?, that’s a clear sign that they know their kid is a little sheet.

This! I’m extra strict at others’ homes, even on stuff I’d allow at our home. If the host wants to correct me (“They are allowed to take the goldfish in the family room”) then that’s different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

She had a baby. It wasn’t the end of the world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

She had a baby. It wasn’t the end of the world.

You have no idea how the birth went for Op. But if she is sore and tired (like most new moms) she probably shouldn't be expected to ride herd on a visitor's misbehaved child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a FTM and a little hormonal.

The IL’s just came by to see the new baby and their kid was a NIGHTMARE the entire time. Jumping on the couches from cushion to cushion, sticking his hands and face in our newborns face after we repeatedly asked him not to. Terrorizing the pets and chasing them through the house. My SIL asked my husband if this behavior was ok and my husband just shrugged. I let the cats out and took the baby away after about 10 minutes, sat in the bedroom nursing and their kid busts in the bedroom while I’m nursing LO. I used a stern voice and said this room is off limits and asked him to go find his mom.

My husband wants to make excuses for their kid because he’s 4.

WWYD if this was your kid?! SIL and BIL didn’t really keep an eye on him and let him run rampant throughout the house. I’m not ok with it and have asked DH to not invite them over again for a while unless they bring toys for him or play outside now that it’s warm.

You have every right to be annoyed and expect the parents to stop the misbehavior. However, he is only four and is still little it is his parents responsibility to discipline him. Do not hold it against him for behaving like a four year old. I know it is hard to believe but your newborn will be four and might misbehave as well. You might do things differently but, I bet you hope that your kid won't be judged forever if he does act up.

Unless you want bad feelings do not banish the kid. Meet them at the park or outside your home if you don't want him coming over. I'm sure the kid will be busy and unless they live next door won't see them too much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

It’s not just boys who behave this way.

dp but I would guess a larger percentage of boys do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

She had a baby. It wasn’t the end of the world.

You have no idea how the birth went for Op. But if she is sore and tired (like most new moms) she probably shouldn't be expected to ride herd on a visitor's misbehaved child.

What is wrong with people?

Do you really need an explanation why it was the parent’s responsibility to supervise their own child? The parents had ONE kid - would it have been the end of the world to supervise him in other people’s houses?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

She had a baby. It wasn’t the end of the world.

You have no idea how the birth went for Op. But if she is sore and tired (like most new moms) she probably shouldn't be expected to ride herd on a visitor's misbehaved child.

No one is saying she had to, but she’s had some time to process the situation and she wants to banish the child. All she had to do was speak up at the time or tell her husband to do so. Her reaction is over the top.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

She had a baby. It wasn’t the end of the world.

You have no idea how the birth went for Op. But if she is sore and tired (like most new moms) she probably shouldn't be expected to ride herd on a visitor's misbehaved child.

No one is saying she had to, but she’s had some time to process the situation and she wants to banish the child. All she had to do was speak up at the time or tell her husband to do so. Her reaction is over the top.

It sounds as though she did speak up when the boy was being wild around her newborn and the boy *did not listen*. Op also put her pets outside when the boy would not leave them alone. She likely said something when he barged into the room while she was breastfeeding.

She *did* speak up, she simply didn't scold the kid or confront the parents over their kid's misbehavior. She is now considering not ever inviting them back. Can't say that I blame her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

She had a baby. It wasn’t the end of the world.

You have no idea how the birth went for Op. But if she is sore and tired (like most new moms) she probably shouldn't be expected to ride herd on a visitor's misbehaved child.

What is wrong with people?

Do you really need an explanation why it was the parent’s responsibility to supervise their own child? The parents had ONE kid - would it have been the end of the world to supervise him in other people’s houses?

Are you always this obtuse? None of PPs said she had to be a martyr.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The child is FOUR. You had to have an idea of his energy level before inviting him/his family to your home.

Yes, wait a few years OP and you’ll be experiencing similar energy levels with your child. The real nightmare here is all of the adults. Your ILs should have controlled their child and brought toys. You and your husband should have put the pets out of harm’s way and spoken up. You should have locked the door when you were nursing. Some children become overstimulated in a new environments and act in ways they wouldn’t normally behave. It also sounds as if you don’t really like other people’s children. You need to be a little more flexible. We were in a similar situation with some friends recently with our two and four year olds, but they have tons of toys, so our children enjoyed themselves and had fun with their pets. We also kept an eye on them.

This is how brats are raised.

If you can’t keep your 4 year old from acting like a terror at people’s houses then DONT bring them out. If your kids won’t behave without toys then it’s your responsibility to bring the toys. You don’t just shrug and say “boys will be boys” as they jump all over furniture and harass the pets.

I say this as a parent of 4 and 2 year old boys.

Whatever you say, Sanctimommy. I didn’t say this behavior was ok. Try to read more carefully next time. I said the adults were misbehaving.

The parents of that boy should have been supervising their child. Op is a new mom with a brand new baby - she just got out of the hospital for goodness sake.

She had a baby. It wasn’t the end of the world.

You have no idea how the birth went for Op. But if she is sore and tired (like most new moms) she probably shouldn't be expected to ride herd on a visitor's misbehaved child.

No one is saying she had to, but she’s had some time to process the situation and she wants to banish the child. All she had to do was speak up at the time or tell her husband to do so. Her reaction is over the top.

It sounds as though she did speak up when the boy was being wild around her newborn and the boy *did not listen*. Op also put her pets outside when the boy would not leave them alone. She likely said something when he barged into the room while she was breastfeeding.

She *did* speak up, she simply didn't scold the kid or confront the parents over their kid's misbehavior. She is now considering not ever inviting them back. Can't say that I blame her.

Hmmm...wonder how her husband would feel about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok, if the mother of this holy terror has to ask “is his behavior ok”?, that’s a clear sign that they know their kid is a little sheet.

Seems you haven’t outgrown this stage.