If sex is important, you make it a priority. If it’s not important, you make excuses. |
+1 perfect answer. PP needs to have a heart to heart with spouse. |
So you're fine with him outsourcing his sexual wants just like you outsource your emotional wants, then? |
| If we go more than once a week my husband gets to be like a cat pawing at the closed bedroom door. I like sex but once or twice a week is fine by me. |
What you're missing is that women want emotional intimacy with their husbands/life partners and that having friends does not take its place. For a husband to say, she can unload on her and I don't need to bother to engage emotionally, is exactly what's going to torpedo her desire for physical intimacy. Likewise, a woman who does not make any effort toward physical intimacy can expect to find her husband less inclined toward emotional intimacy. To put it another way, it feels just as lonely for a woman to not be able to talk to or be heard by her spouse as it is for a husband to feel that his wife never wants to have sex. |
| she can unload on her *friends* |
My H prefers I outsource my emotional support. I don't want him to outsource sex.. If I forced him to be emotionally supportive he may want a divorce. If he outsourced sex I will divorce. |
I'm sorry your marriage is like that. That sucks. |
He cooks, does dishes, morning routine, daddy tracked to be a more involved parent, is full of life, brings art and music to our lives. I couldn't care less that I have friends to lean on for emotional support actually, it's ideal. |
| One per week is perfect. More would be a chore |
| I have sex with my wife once a week. If I didn’t she start to think that I’m getting it elsewhere and that would wreck a good thing. |
Ah, marriage! The classic prisoner’s dilemma. |
Right, and it sucks. For him. And I am sorry your marriage is like that. |
My schedule is really busy and I have sex at least 4 times a week. You sound lazy. |
at 7:45 you go upstairs and shower and get into bed. Take a 20 minute nap. Your H does the dishes and puts the kids in bed. At 8:30 he comes to bed and you have sex from 8:30-9. |