Do you regret being a virgin?

[Anonymous]

I would be so pissed if I waited and DH didn't.
We didn't wait,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think waiting until marriage is a terrible idea. At least three of my very serious relationships ended because we did not enjoy the same kind of sex. It would have awful if we had waited only to find out on the wedding night that we were not compatible. When I did marry, it was to a person with whom I had wonderful sex with before marriage.

this. I had a LOT more experience than by DH when we married. Which is why I know how much I am missing out on now...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think waiting until marriage is a terrible idea. At least three of my very serious relationships ended because we did not enjoy the same kind of sex. It would have awful if we had waited only to find out on the wedding night that we were not compatible. When I did marry, it was to a person with whom I had wonderful sex with before marriage.

this. I had a LOT more experience than by DH when we married. Which is why I know how much I am missing out on now...

Can't you teach him what you like?

[Anonymous]

OP, I think you make too big a deal of it. Regret about your 20s is pointless, because your 20s are not coming back. On the positive side, many women don't peak till their 30s, so if you are like me, you didn't miss much. I didn't wait, but I didn't exactly have things figured out until early 30s.

If you ask for advice: Don't wait. If it is important for you to wait for whatever reason, well, that's up to you, and no one else really cares.

[Anonymous]

What are the benefits for the op to wait and the consequences if she does not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a virgin who is about to turn 30. I am waiting till marriage. Now I feel regret thinking I missed out on years of what couldve been really amazing sex! I have a boyfriend whom I intend to marry. Should I go for it?
Did I miss out?

Sorry, but yes, you missed out. I had some lovely sex pre marriage with different men. Now I have lovely+ sex with my DH, but I'm glad I know for sure he's as good as it gets.

[Anonymous]

I'm 33 and a virgin. About to be engaged soon and I have offered to give up my virginity to my BF of 2 years. He is not a virgin, but has had 1 partner.

I was raised Catholic and believed in waiting til marriage, but now that we're pretty close to it, Iknow I'm going to be with him for the future, I feel good about being ready and being his. Ironically though he hasn't taken me up on the offer and is now turning the tables and making me wait til marriage. his reasoning though: birth control. I don't take any, and don't want to take any because of the side effects. He doesn't want us to be knocked up before we walk down the aisle. Some times though I wish he could just go for it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 33 and a virgin. About to be engaged soon and I have offered to give up my virginity to my BF of 2 years. He is not a virgin, but has had 1 partner.

I was raised Catholic and believed in waiting til marriage, but now that we're pretty close to it, Iknow I'm going to be with him for the future, I feel good about being ready and being his. Ironically though he hasn't taken me up on the offer and is now turning the tables and making me wait til marriage. his reasoning though: birth control. I don't take any, and don't want to take any because of the side effects. He doesn't want us to be knocked up before we walk down the aisle. Some times though I wish he could just go for it!

As someone who was trying to conceive recently, I really think everyone should read up on their cycles (I read Taking Charge of Your Fertility, highly recommended in the TTC forum.) You really do not need to abstain for the whole month, the amount of stress I put myself through in my single days is almost laughable now... Seriously, there is like a few days to a week period where you shouldn't have sex if you don't want to risk pregnancy (although as another poster mentioned, it is often when you are most in the mood because, biology...)

[Anonymous]

I don't think it is the worst thing to wait, I lost my virginity in my mid 20's and had a great time experimenting after that.

It made it clear when I met my husband that we were sexually compatible in a way I had never experienced before. I have no regrets about it, but having a healthy and mutually beneficial sex life was important to me.

[Anonymous]

Sex is waaaaay to important to wait until after marriage, only then to see if you are compatible.
I would NEVER suggest somebody remain virgin, nor would I ever suggest marrying a virgin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think waiting until marriage is a terrible idea. At least three of my very serious relationships ended because we did not enjoy the same kind of sex. It would have awful if we had waited only to find out on the wedding night that we were not compatible. When I did marry, it was to a person with whom I had wonderful sex with before marriage.

this. I had a LOT more experience than by DH when we married. Which is why I know how much I am missing out on now...

Can't you teach him what you like? [/quote

I try and he tries but he honestly needs
More experience with different women. Lacks confidence. Men seem to benefit if at one point they had an older woman as a partner to yeah them as well. I am still happy I married him and I love my memories. I think a lot of you have no clue what you are missing out on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 33 and a virgin. About to be engaged soon and I have offered to give up my virginity to my BF of 2 years. He is not a virgin, but has had 1 partner.

I was raised Catholic and believed in waiting til marriage, but now that we're pretty close to it, Iknow I'm going to be with him for the future, I feel good about being ready and being his. Ironically though he hasn't taken me up on the offer and is now turning the tables and making me wait til marriage. his reasoning though: birth control. I don't take any, and don't want to take any because of the side effects. He doesn't want us to be knocked up before we walk down the aisle. Some times though I wish he could just go for it!

I have feeling your soon to be DH isn't going to be that into sex even after your married. It will be one excuse after another. Been there done that. Luckily I wasn't married to any of them. But I read your post and thought either gay or majorly screwed up regarding sex. You really need to talk to him before marriage. A man with a healthy sexuality would be willing of his partner is willing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its cool that you waited, but sex is just sex, so just be careful that you don't fantasize it will be some magical experience on your wedding night. In that case you will be disappointed and your DH will also feel bad. I would experiment a lot before the big night, coming very close if not all the way, so you don't have overly unrealistic expectations, and so you know a bit more about what you like and don't like.

i totally disagree with the comment about most women not orgasming with vaginal sex. But, sex is never like it is in the movies-sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't-and you want to experiment a bit to find what works for you. The first few times take a bit of practice. Good luck!

PS: don't move in with him before you are married. i think that's worse than sex before marriage in terms of potentially winding up in a marriage you might have otherwise have opted out of.

Amen to this.
Yes, some of the best sex advice I got was that sometimes it goes wrong (especially in the beginning). When that happens, seriously do your best to not be hurt and whiny. Just talk, say what you want, listen to each other and talk about what you'll do better the next time. It sounds silly but it turned out to work wonders. When I say 'go wrong' I just mean you'll be doing great then someone makes a move that maybe ruins the flow of things--it's very easy for me to go back to square 1 in terms of being turned on. Then he feels upset that I'm done or whatever. Just talk it through and use your very best classic communication skills, and learn for next time.

This sounds very juvenile. I would much rather be married to someone who already knows what they are doing.

[Anonymous]

I regret that I didn't mature faster in that way, and have more fun in my 20's. Had I had more experience early on, I might have wound up with a different and possibly better life partner. So, yes, I regret it but I'm not sure I could have changed it at the time. I lost my virginity at around 30. Don't wait until you're married. Virginity is not like fine wine that gets better with time. You start aging and then you're not as nubile.

[Anonymous]

My sister waited till she was married (religious) and had a bit of a bad honeymoon because of it. It hurt. She thought that maybe her vagina shriveled from disuse (I think she was semi joking) She was 25 when she got married.

I, on the other hand, had, uh, more experience. I would not have married my husband of 12 years now without having sex with him. It's too important to me.