If you refused sex to your foreign spouse because of rancid flatulence, could they shag a bobcat?

Anonymous wrote:I never talk about this because I don't like people thinking I'm conceited, but.....people really do stop me on the street all the time to tell me how attractive I am. I'm 41 but look 21. I get carded at bars -- last time, the bouncer actually confiscated my ID because he thought it was fake! One man was literally blinded by my beauty. I felt so bad about it that I started a scholarship at an SLAC in his name.

I have four children and they're all just as beautiful as me. They're just as nice and smart and humble, too, and when some poor unfortunate-looking child wants to be friends with them, why, they invite him right over and never brag about their 3,500-square-foot toy room and custom crafting workshop. He even gets to take home whatever toy he made, because it's probably the nicest thing he'll own, you know?

You copied and pasted this from an actual thread, didn't you. If you didn't, I'm sure you could have.

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10/08/2015 16:33

Subject: If you refused sex to your foreign spouse because of rancid flatulence, could they shag a bobcat?

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Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never talk about this because I don't like people thinking I'm conceited, but.....people really do stop me on the street all the time to tell me how attractive I am. I'm 41 but look 21. I get carded at bars -- last time, the bouncer actually confiscated my ID because he thought it was fake! One man was literally blinded by my beauty. I felt so bad about it that I started a scholarship at an SLAC in his name.

I have four children and they're all just as beautiful as me. They're just as nice and smart and humble, too, and when some poor unfortunate-looking child wants to be friends with them, why, they invite him right over and never brag about their 3,500-square-foot toy room and custom crafting workshop. He even gets to take home whatever toy he made, because it's probably the nicest thing he'll own, you know?

You copied and pasted this from an actual thread, didn't you. If you didn't, I'm sure you could have.

The literally blinded part is pure DCUM genius. This is why I can't quit you.

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10/08/2015 16:52

Subject: If you refused sex to your foreign spouse because of rancid flatulence, could they shag a bobcat?

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Anonymous

Rancid farts may be culturally appropriate in your 3rd world country but you are in America now! Get with the program.
Americans do not fart and they do not inhale!

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10/08/2015 16:57

Subject: If you refused sex to your foreign spouse because of rancid flatulence, could they shag a bobcat?

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Anonymous

Not true. I know many public school parents who fart. That's why DH and I send our snowflake to a Big 3 private school. Like a Sidwell parent would let a rancid one fly in Malia's classroom?

Anonymous wrote:Rancid farts may be culturally appropriate in your 3rd world country but you are in America now! Get with the program.
Americans do not fart and they do not inhale!

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10/08/2015 17:05

Subject: Re:If you refused sex to your foreign spouse because of rancid flatulence, could they shag a bobcat?

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Anonymous

Not unless the Bobcat lives in NoAr. Then my spouse is certainly good enough to shag them because we live in Pimmit Hills. We're middle class BigLaw lawyers who only make $650K HHI but you can't tell because we act poor by sending our kids to Landon (should we qualify for FA?) and we believe everything that HRH HRC says, we we'll vote for her even if she is convicted and sent to prison. I mean if Martha Stewart can still make $1M while in prison, HRC should be able to run the country from there.

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10/08/2015 17:06

Subject: If you refused sex to your foreign spouse because of rancid flatulence, could they shag a bobcat?

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Anonymous

You didn't breastfeed, did you? And your MIL wants twenty of you to share a one-bedroom beach rental to discuss it.

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10/08/2015 17:09

Subject: If you refused sex to your foreign spouse because of rancid flatulence, could they shag a bobcat?

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Anonymous