My parent has gotten sick very fast, other parent in denial, how to pay for nursing home in Virginia

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He gets the care he needs until he runs out of money, and then medicaid pays. He needs to move to a facility which accepts medicaid. They probably now need to live separately. As a couple they only have to spend 50% of their assets on his care. You mother will not be destitute. They will spend thru their assets, that's what happens.

STOP SAYING THATTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
People please get educated!
Medicaid is a program to which you have to apply!!!! It is not a given!
And people can be broker than a joke and get denied!!!!@
What the heck in life just freaking kicks in!!
I know folks mean well, but this advice is just bad and if people follow it they will be in a world of trouble.

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money.

I am not being a smart ass, I swear I am not, so please understand me when I tell you that you are dead wrong. Medicaid is not a program that just finds people and who have run out of money and just pays their bills. There is nothing no where in this country where some program just ups and pays your bill because you cannot. It is a program to which you need to apply. It is a tedious process, and you can get denied. Yes, you can not have funds and be broke and sick and your medicaid application be denied. And if you do not think a nursing home will not come after you for unpaid bills, you need to look up filial support laws.
And if you do not think they will not kick people out, then your also mistaken. Not only that, look up some stories of places where people have put their loved ones that are medicaid pending, or take all medicaid and how some of these people are treated at some of these facilities.

No one is assuming that Medicaid just miraculously shows up and starts handing out money. You are a little over the top. And trust me, I think we all know that Medicaid is not the best thing that can happen to you -- it's not the lottery nor does it mean you are entitled to cadillac care.

yes they are assuming that did you not read the post to which I was responding????

I was the pp you responded to. Obviously I didn't think medicaid just rides in and passes out money. In both cases that we recently went through- the nursing home staff helped us fill out the forms and get medicaid. It was a process. Both patients had already been in the nursing home for over a year before they depleted assets enough for medicaid. I think the nursing home dealt with this situation all the time. Some states are easier I believe to deal with.

[Anonymous]

Is your Dad a veteran? If so, he might get some help there. Are you sure he needs 24 hour care? Could someone come in for a set number of hous a day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you've gotten some great advice, but I wanted to mention one more thing. If you have no payor source for the hospitalization, your father will be on the hook for payment. So, it's a good idea to work quickly, cooperatively and efficiently with the social worker. I agree that you shouldn't panic because you have a great resource - the hospital social worker. But, you can't sit back and not move things along either because your father isn't going to get to stay in the hospital for free.

And, seriously heed the PPs advice about not giving away your parents' resources to get qualified for Medicaid. It doesn't work.

Definitely work with the hospital social worker as I suggested up thread, but please be clear that the social worker works for the hospital, and their endgame is to get that bed free. Is your dad on medicare? He has I believe 90 or 100 days of skilled nursing if he gets sent to rehab again. Honestly, I would not be worried about paying for his current hospital stay. Your big concern is long term, that is a much bigger bill. Right now, the fact that he is sick and their is no diagnosis leaves the ball in the hospital's court. Your dad is sick, immobile and UNDIAGNOSED.

What is your obsession with diagnosis? Do you really want some fake catch all diagnosis to make everyone feel better with a label?
Obviously you went the "hospital and doctors are the enemy" route with your situation, but most of your posts have wrong information in them.

Just to correct this post, you have 100 Med A days in a rehab (some are connected to nursing facilities, some are not) but only the first 21 days are 100% reimbursed, it goes down incrementally from there. If he has been in and out of the hospital and to rehab, those days are already counting down from 100, meaning he may have already used up his 21 free days

And remember your rant against the hospital and social worker when complaining about healthcare costs. If a person does not need the specialized acute skills of a hospital 24/7, the most expensive stay on the medical world, then yes the hospital should find a level of care appropriate to the need. And don't complain about ER wait times either, when the ER is backed up because there are no available beds for admits

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you've gotten some great advice, but I wanted to mention one more thing. If you have no payor source for the hospitalization, your father will be on the hook for payment. So, it's a good idea to work quickly, cooperatively and efficiently with the social worker. I agree that you shouldn't panic because you have a great resource - the hospital social worker. But, you can't sit back and not move things along either because your father isn't going to get to stay in the hospital for free.

And, seriously heed the PPs advice about not giving away your parents' resources to get qualified for Medicaid. It doesn't work.

Definitely work with the hospital social worker as I suggested up thread, but please be clear that the social worker works for the hospital, and their endgame is to get that bed free. Is your dad on medicare? He has I believe 90 or 100 days of skilled nursing if he gets sent to rehab again. Honestly, I would not be worried about paying for his current hospital stay. Your big concern is long term, that is a much bigger bill. Right now, the fact that he is sick and their is no diagnosis leaves the ball in the hospital's court. Your dad is sick, immobile and UNDIAGNOSED.

What is your obsession with diagnosis? Do you really want some fake catch all diagnosis to make everyone feel better with a label?
Obviously you went the "hospital and doctors are the enemy" route with your situation, but most of your posts have wrong information in them.

Just to correct this post, you have 100 Med A days in a rehab (some are connected to nursing facilities, some are not) but only the first 21 days are 100% reimbursed, it goes down incrementally from there. If he has been in and out of the hospital and to rehab, those days are already counting down from 100, meaning he may have already used up his 21 free days

And remember your rant against the hospital and social worker when complaining about healthcare costs. If a person does not need the specialized acute skills of a hospital 24/7, the most expensive stay on the medical world, then yes the hospital should find a level of care appropriate to the need. And don't complain about ER wait times either, when the ER is backed up because there are no available beds for admits

Get over yourself. Understanding that you are your parents' best advocate is not saying the hospital is the enemy. It is about understanding your goals and theirs is not always the same . It is understanding that you need to know and understand ALL your options.

[Anonymous]

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money.

You are wrong if you think you can stay withou paying. There are eviction procedures to get people who aren't paying out of nursing homes and, trust me, they are used. All that needs to be done is a safe discharge, which means in the moment, not a week down the road. Medicaid doesn't pay unless you complete the application process, which many families don't, and qualify. As PP said, it's not automatic. You have to spend down your money first.

Oh and in some states family members can be held responsible for the bills. So do t be so cavalier about it. Nursing homes are businesses that need money to stay open they go after any and all legal pastor sources including children where the law allows.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think you've gotten some great advice, but I wanted to mention one more thing. If you have no payor source for the hospitalization, your father will be on the hook for payment. So, it's a good idea to work quickly, cooperatively and efficiently with the social worker. I agree that you shouldn't panic because you have a great resource - the hospital social worker. But, you can't sit back and not move things along either because your father isn't going to get to stay in the hospital for free.

And, seriously heed the PPs advice about not giving away your parents' resources to get qualified for Medicaid. It doesn't work.

Definitely work with the hospital social worker as I suggested up thread, but please be clear that the social worker works for the hospital, and their endgame is to get that bed free. Is your dad on medicare? He has I believe 90 or 100 days of skilled nursing if he gets sent to rehab again. Honestly, I would not be worried about paying for his current hospital stay. Your big concern is long term, that is a much bigger bill. Right now, the fact that he is sick and their is no diagnosis leaves the ball in the hospital's court. Your dad is sick, immobile and UNDIAGNOSED.

What is your obsession with diagnosis? Do you really want some fake catch all diagnosis to make everyone feel better with a label?
Obviously you went the "hospital and doctors are the enemy" route with your situation, but most of your posts have wrong information in them.

Just to correct this post, you have 100 Med A days in a rehab (some are connected to nursing facilities, some are not) but only the first 21 days are 100% reimbursed, it goes down incrementally from there. If he has been in and out of the hospital and to rehab, those days are already counting down from 100, meaning he may have already used up his 21 free days

And remember your rant against the hospital and social worker when complaining about healthcare costs. If a person does not need the specialized acute skills of a hospital 24/7, the most expensive stay on the medical world, then yes the hospital should find a level of care appropriate to the need. And don't complain about ER wait times either, when the ER is backed up because there are no available beds for admits

Get over yourself. Understanding that you are your parents' best advocate is not saying the hospital is the enemy. It is about understanding your goals and theirs is not always the same . It is understanding that you need to know and understand ALL your options.

Well at least this post DIDNT HAVE ALL CAPS with hysteria and sport analogies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He gets the care he needs until he runs out of money, and then medicaid pays. He needs to move to a facility which accepts medicaid. They probably now need to live separately. As a couple they only have to spend 50% of their assets on his care. You mother will not be destitute. They will spend thru their assets, that's what happens.

STOP SAYING THATTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
People please get educated!
Medicaid is a program to which you have to apply!!!! It is not a given!
And people can be broker than a joke and get denied!!!!@
What the heck in life just freaking kicks in!!
I know folks mean well, but this advice is just bad and if people follow it they will be in a world of trouble.

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money.

I am not being a smart ass, I swear I am not, so please understand me when I tell you that you are dead wrong. Medicaid is not a program that just finds people and who have run out of money and just pays their bills. There is nothing no where in this country where some program just ups and pays your bill because you cannot. It is a program to which you need to apply. It is a tedious process, and you can get denied. Yes, you can not have funds and be broke and sick and your medicaid application be denied. And if you do not think a nursing home will not come after you for unpaid bills, you need to look up filial support laws.
And if you do not think they will not kick people out, then your also mistaken. Not only that, look up some stories of places where people have put their loved ones that are medicaid pending, or take all medicaid and how some of these people are treated at some of these facilities.

I don't think are familiar with how medicaidmworks with respect to nursing homes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He gets the care he needs until he runs out of money, and then medicaid pays. He needs to move to a facility which accepts medicaid. They probably now need to live separately. As a couple they only have to spend 50% of their assets on his care. You mother will not be destitute. They will spend thru their assets, that's what happens.

STOP SAYING THATTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
People please get educated!
Medicaid is a program to which you have to apply!!!! It is not a given!
And people can be broker than a joke and get denied!!!!@
What the heck in life just freaking kicks in!!
I know folks mean well, but this advice is just bad and if people follow it they will be in a world of trouble.

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money.

I am not being a smart ass, I swear I am not, so please understand me when I tell you that you are dead wrong. Medicaid is not a program that just finds people and who have run out of money and just pays their bills. There is nothing no where in this country where some program just ups and pays your bill because you cannot. It is a program to which you need to apply. It is a tedious process, and you can get denied. Yes, you can not have funds and be broke and sick and your medicaid application be denied. And if you do not think a nursing home will not come after you for unpaid bills, you need to look up filial support laws.
And if you do not think they will not kick people out, then your also mistaken. Not only that, look up some stories of places where people have put their loved ones that are medicaid pending, or take all medicaid and how some of these people are treated at some of these facilities.

I don't think are familiar with how medicaidmworks with respect to nursing homes.

Not the PP, but I think she knows exactly how it works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He gets the care he needs until he runs out of money, and then medicaid pays. He needs to move to a facility which accepts medicaid. They probably now need to live separately. As a couple they only have to spend 50% of their assets on his care. You mother will not be destitute. They will spend thru their assets, that's what happens.

STOP SAYING THATTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
People please get educated!
Medicaid is a program to which you have to apply!!!! It is not a given!
And people can be broker than a joke and get denied!!!!@
What the heck in life just freaking kicks in!!
I know folks mean well, but this advice is just bad and if people follow it they will be in a world of trouble.

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money.

I am not being a smart ass, I swear I am not, so please understand me when I tell you that you are dead wrong. Medicaid is not a program that just finds people and who have run out of money and just pays their bills. There is nothing no where in this country where some program just ups and pays your bill because you cannot. It is a program to which you need to apply. It is a tedious process, and you can get denied. Yes, you can not have funds and be broke and sick and your medicaid application be denied. And if you do not think a nursing home will not come after you for unpaid bills, you need to look up filial support laws.
And if you do not think they will not kick people out, then your also mistaken. Not only that, look up some stories of places where people have put their loved ones that are medicaid pending, or take all medicaid and how some of these people are treated at some of these facilities.

IN order to get medicaid, you have to go into a nursing home medicaid pending. The nursing home cannot go after relatives in less you agree. They asked us to sign an agreement and we refused. No big deal. If you have no assets, its not hard to get at all... just dealing with the lazy workers is the absolute nightmare. You clearly are very fortunate to have money and funds to pay for nursing home care. Not all of us are that lucky and after a year of caring for my MIL with severe dementia, I couldn't do it anymore and meet my children's needs. This is not just medicaid. You can be denied medicaid and still get long term care medicaid. They are two different programs.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He gets the care he needs until he runs out of money, [b]and then medicaid pays.[/b] He needs to move to a facility which accepts medicaid. They probably now need to live separately. As a couple they only have to spend 50% of their assets on his care. You mother will not be destitute. They will spend thru their assets, that's what happens.[/quote]
STOP SAYING THATTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
People please get educated!
Medicaid is a program to which you have to apply!!!! It is not a given!
And people can be broker than a joke and get denied!!!!@
What the heck in life just freaking kicks in!!
I know folks mean well, but this advice is just bad and if people follow it they will be in a world of trouble.[/quote]

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money. [/quote]
I am not being a smart ass, I swear I am not, so please understand me when I tell you that you are dead wrong. Medicaid is not a program that just finds people and who have run out of money and just pays their bills. There is nothing no where in this country where some program just ups and pays your bill because you cannot. It is a program to which you need to apply. It is a tedious process, and you can get denied. Yes, you can not have funds and be broke and sick and your medicaid application be denied. And if you do not think a nursing home will not come after you for unpaid bills, you need to look up filial support laws.
And if you do not think they will not kick people out, then your also mistaken. Not only that, look up some stories of places where people have put their loved ones that are medicaid pending, or take all medicaid and how some of these people are treated at some of these facilities. [/quote]

IN order to get medicaid, you have to go into a nursing home medicaid pending. The nursing home cannot go after relatives in less you agree. They asked us to sign an agreement and we refused. No big deal. If you have no assets, its not hard to get at all... just dealing with the lazy workers is the absolute nightmare. You clearly are very fortunate to have money and funds to pay for nursing home care. Not all of us are that lucky and after a year of caring for my MIL with severe dementia, I couldn't do it anymore and meet my children's needs. This is not just medicaid. You can be denied medicaid and still get long term care medicaid. They are two different programs.[/quote]
1) some nursing homes will not take you Medicaid pending
You do not have to be in a nursing home, are you kidding me??
2) Filial support laws, look them up

3) if my parents were the Trumps and if my family was not filled with social workers then maybe I would not know WTH I was talking about.

[Anonymous]

wow, this filial suppot law stuff is really scarey. and Maryland has them. http://www.forbes.com/sites/northwesternmutual/2014/02/03/who-will-pay-for-moms-or-dads-nursing-home-bill-filial-support-laws-and-long-term-care/

I wonder if you can just move out of the state to escape. Does it depend on which state the parent is in, which the child is in, or both?

Can they really take all the money from a 25 year old with kids to pay for somebody who can not talk or move to have 24/7 care from age 85 to age 95? If they tried to do that to me, I guess I'd have to shoot myself.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He gets the care he needs until he runs out of money, [b]and then medicaid pays.[/b] He needs to move to a facility which accepts medicaid. They probably now need to live separately. As a couple they only have to spend 50% of their assets on his care. You mother will not be destitute. They will spend thru their assets, that's what happens.[/quote]
STOP SAYING THATTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
People please get educated!
Medicaid is a program to which you have to apply!!!! It is not a given!
And people can be broker than a joke and get denied!!!!@
What the heck in life just freaking kicks in!!
I know folks mean well, but this advice is just bad and if people follow it they will be in a world of trouble.[/quote]

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money. [/quote]
I am not being a smart ass, I swear I am not, so please understand me when I tell you that you are dead wrong. Medicaid is not a program that just finds people and who have run out of money and just pays their bills. There is nothing no where in this country where some program just ups and pays your bill because you cannot. It is a program to which you need to apply. It is a tedious process, and you can get denied. Yes, you can not have funds and be broke and sick and your medicaid application be denied. And if you do not think a nursing home will not come after you for unpaid bills, you need to look up filial support laws.
And if you do not think they will not kick people out, then your also mistaken. Not only that, look up some stories of places where people have put their loved ones that are medicaid pending, or take all medicaid and how some of these people are treated at some of these facilities. [/quote]

IN order to get medicaid, you have to go into a nursing home medicaid pending. The nursing home cannot go after relatives in less you agree. They asked us to sign an agreement and we refused. No big deal. If you have no assets, its not hard to get at all... just dealing with the lazy workers is the absolute nightmare. You clearly are very fortunate to have money and funds to pay for nursing home care. Not all of us are that lucky and after a year of caring for my MIL with severe dementia, I couldn't do it anymore and meet my children's needs. This is not just medicaid. You can be denied medicaid and still get long term care medicaid. They are two different programs.[/quote]
1) some nursing homes will not take you Medicaid pending
You do not have to be in a nursing home, are you kidding me??
2) Filial support laws, look them up

3) if my parents were the Trumps and if my family was not filled with social workers then maybe I would not know WTH I was talking about.[/quote]

Your family being social workers and you being a social worker specific to long term care medicaid are very different

We went through this with my MIL and I have a professional background in it. In MD, you do have to be actually in a facility before you can apply for medicaid. Many people private pay a few months or go in through an hospital stay covered by medicare. It was almost impossible to go into a nursing home on medicaid pending from home - we did it and found one but very few do it. I am not concerned about Filial support laws. We had no other choice. We could not care for my MIL any longer - she was getting worse and needed 24/7 care which I struggled with as I needed to leave the house to drop my kids to/from school and other things. The Adult Protective Services promised adult day care or an inhome caregiver but they never followed through. We applied for respite help and many other programs which are there in writing but not in reality. There was no other family member willing to help. Our only option was a medicaid nursing home bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He gets the care he needs until he runs out of money, and then medicaid pays. He needs to move to a facility which accepts medicaid. They probably now need to live separately. As a couple they only have to spend 50% of their assets on his care. You mother will not be destitute. They will spend thru their assets, that's what happens.

STOP SAYING THATTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!
People please get educated!
Medicaid is a program to which you have to apply!!!! It is not a given!
And people can be broker than a joke and get denied!!!!@
What the heck in life just freaking kicks in!!
I know folks mean well, but this advice is just bad and if people follow it they will be in a world of trouble.

Yes it's hard to get medicaid to pay, but when the person is in the nursing home and runs out of money, medicaid is forced to step in. What is the alternative? Wheeling grandpa onto the street? They can't go after children's money. For our grandparents we have gotten medicaid to pay up when they run out of money.

I am not being a smart ass, I swear I am not, so please understand me when I tell you that you are dead wrong. Medicaid is not a program that just finds people and who have run out of money and just pays their bills. There is nothing no where in this country where some program just ups and pays your bill because you cannot. It is a program to which you need to apply. It is a tedious process, and you can get denied. Yes, you can not have funds and be broke and sick and your medicaid application be denied. And if you do not think a nursing home will not come after you for unpaid bills, you need to look up filial support laws.
And if you do not think they will not kick people out, then your also mistaken. Not only that, look up some stories of places where people have put their loved ones that are medicaid pending, or take all medicaid and how some of these people are treated at some of these facilities.

IN order to get medicaid, you have to go into a nursing home medicaid pending. The nursing home cannot go after relatives in less you agree. They asked us to sign an agreement and we refused. No big deal. If you have no assets, its not hard to get at all... just dealing with the lazy workers is the absolute nightmare. You clearly are very fortunate to have money and funds to pay for nursing home care. Not all of us are that lucky and after a year of caring for my MIL with severe dementia, I couldn't do it anymore and meet my children's needs. This is not just medicaid. You can be denied medicaid and still get long term care medicaid. They are two different programs.

Exactly, pop seems unable to distinguish between Medicaid and extended care Medicaid.

[Anonymous]

The while thread is about long term nursing hone care so why would I be talking about medicaid for for sonething else. ?
I was not talking about Medicaid pending from home. You can be in the hospital or rehab and start the process. Yes, different states have different process and different regulations.
And yes people can be in the nursing home Medicaid pending and be denied.
And I did not imply that you were worried about filial support issues, I was responding to comment about nursing homes not being able to come after the family for money, which is in some places they are able to do.

[Anonymous]

Filial support laws have been used only a handful of times. No one is going to come after you for 8000 a month for your parents care. The only thing that medicaid look into is the transfer of assets from parents to kids - if this has been done in a certain timeframe then they can - rightly- come after you for that.