My DH left the house to meet a girl...

[Anonymous]

Incognita wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think he is telling the truth. What do I do? He said he felt excited after it happened.

You are an idiot.

Pretty harsh. She's going through a lot right now, and it's easy for all of us to see that he is clearly lying, but I understand why she wants to believe him. Hopefully she will come around sooner than later.
She isn't an idiot- she's just in pain.

I agree. No need to name call, but we should all also give advice that's worth a damn, wake her up, or she will be back to talk about her pain in a few months.

Completely agree. And I think most of us are doing that, minus the name calling.

[Anonymous]

Incognita wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think he is telling the truth. What do I do? He said he felt excited after it happened.

You are an idiot.

Pretty harsh. She's going through a lot right now, and it's easy for all of us to see that he is clearly lying, but I understand why she wants to believe him. Hopefully she will come around sooner than later.
She isn't an idiot- she's just in pain.

I agree. No need to name call, but we should all also give advice that's worth a damn, wake her up, or she will be back to talk about her pain in a few months.

That was her wake up call. She is the type to see his dick in another woman and still believe him when he said he didnt cheat

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who cares if it was kissing or sex. The main thing is he had a wandering eye, and was acting upon it. Even if they did nothing, he snuck around behind you to meet this woman. No need to play Sherlock Holmes and figure out what they did -- point is he met her and hid it from you.

I know some will say get rid of him, but I'd say think of the why. Leave out the physical part too. I'm guessing he felt young again to talk to this woman. and his conversations with her were uplifting and not like your current conversations (you said your marriage is on the rocks). Would some other husband have done the same in the same situation?

Then decide.. do you want to work on whatever the problems are, or move on?

It matters because if he is still lying to her, they can't move forward in any real way.

[Anonymous]

Incognita wrote:OP you're in denial. If you do believe him, no harm in confirming with the other woman right? And if he is so open now he shouldn't have a problem with you speaking to her yourself, or listening in on the conversation. It seems more like you don't want to know the truth so you want to accept we just kissed story.

At 9pm he has more than enough time to make that trip twice, sorry you are lying to yourself. Also, not sure what being excited have to do with anything, he could be excited after making love to his lover in his car.. Seriously get the truth.

+1. Also think back to your first dates with a guy once you were out of college especially if you met him over the internet. Were you willing to meet a guy for the first time after 9pm at night by yourself? If a guy told me that the only time he could meet up with me was 9:30pm and we had only been texting/talking on the phone until that point, I would find out when he was available to meet earlier like right after work or on the weekend. That's also kind of late for the first few dates unless it was tickets for something like a comedy club, going to a jazz club etc type of event.

Odds are that he has met with this woman before at least enough that she felt comfortable meeting him late and past the time for traditional first date things ...unless she is married too.

[Anonymous]

If my husband said the cheating crap he did excited him I'd say wait until the divorce papers are served. That will blow your mind MFer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who has a phone log?
I delete all calls and voice mails everyday.
Private browse.

The only log is in the bowl.

LOL! me too. I'm not even having an affair. I am paranoid about my phone getting lost or stolen.

OP's DH is a moron. For more reasons than one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If my husband said the cheating crap he did excited him I'd say wait until the divorce papers are served. That will blow your mind MFer.

Lol that is amazing!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Incognita wrote:OP you're in denial. If you do believe him, no harm in confirming with the other woman right? And if he is so open now he shouldn't have a problem with you speaking to her yourself, or listening in on the conversation. It seems more like you don't want to know the truth so you want to accept we just kissed story.

At 9pm he has more than enough time to make that trip twice, sorry you are lying to yourself. Also, not sure what being excited have to do with anything, he could be excited after making love to his lover in his car.. Seriously get the truth.

+1. Also think back to your first dates with a guy once you were out of college especially if you met him over the internet. Were you willing to meet a guy for the first time after 9pm at night by yourself? If a guy told me that the only time he could meet up with me was 9:30pm and we had only been texting/talking on the phone until that point, I would find out when he was available to meet earlier like right after work or on the weekend. That's also kind of late for the first few dates unless it was tickets for something like a comedy club, going to a jazz club etc type of event.

Odds are that he has met with this woman before at least enough that she felt comfortable meeting him late and past the time for traditional first date things ...unless she is married too.

Good point. I am single and if someone asked to meet me at 930 pm I would laugh at them. Most women want to meet someone at a reasonable hour in a public place. Most coffee shops in he suburbs are closed at this time, and I doubt the ones that are open are fine with a couple making out in the middle of the store. Smells like bullshit to me.

[Incognita]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Incognita wrote:OP you're in denial. If you do believe him, no harm in confirming with the other woman right? And if he is so open now he shouldn't have a problem with you speaking to her yourself, or listening in on the conversation. It seems more like you don't want to know the truth so you want to accept we just kissed story.

At 9pm he has more than enough time to make that trip twice, sorry you are lying to yourself. Also, not sure what being excited have to do with anything, he could be excited after making love to his lover in his car.. Seriously get the truth.

+1. Also think back to your first dates with a guy once you were out of college especially if you met him over the internet. Were you willing to meet a guy for the first time after 9pm at night by yourself? If a guy told me that the only time he could meet up with me was 9:30pm and we had only been texting/talking on the phone until that point, I would find out when he was available to meet earlier like right after work or on the weekend. That's also kind of late for the first few dates unless it was tickets for something like a comedy club, going to a jazz club etc type of event.

Odds are that he has met with this woman before at least enough that she felt comfortable meeting him late and past the time for traditional first date things ...unless she is married too.

Good point. I am single and if someone asked to meet me at 930 pm I would laugh at them. Most women want to meet someone at a reasonable hour in a public place. Most coffee shops in he suburbs are closed at this time, and I doubt the ones that are open are fine with a couple making out in the middle of the store. Smells like bullshit to me.

Furthermore, if OP really believes there was no time, I'm not sure I see a "I'm really busy I can only stop by to give you a kiss and leave" as a first meeting. The woman either knows he is sneaking around, or it's not the first time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends if OP's DH is alpha.

If he is, OP has more incentive to stay.

If not, then she won't.

Lol. You MRAs are so sad.

I would say a good 30-35% of women on this board usually agree with me.

Imagine if HRC posted on DCUM 20 years ago....posters would be like "leave him!"

and she wouldn't.

Because BC is the most alpha guy on the planet.

Look at Huma and AW.

It's funny because I think compared to any other town in the country, this one consistently shows this dynamic at work - again and again and again.

So my advice to guys is - don't cheat or step out on your wife (loyalty and supportiveness are the two biggest keys in my book to a long and healthy relationship).

BUT if you want to/do, make sure your value is so high that your wife won't leave you because she knows instinctively that she will never land a guy ever again at your level.

It is less about condoning any actions of people but more of exposing the truths.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends if OP's DH is alpha.

If he is, OP has more incentive to stay.

If not, then she won't.

Lol. You MRAs are so sad.

I would say a good 30-35% of women on this board usually agree with me.

Imagine if HRC posted on DCUM 20 years ago....posters would be like "leave him!"

and she wouldn't.

Because BC is the most alpha guy on the planet.

Look at Huma and AW.

It's funny because I think compared to any other town in the country, this one consistently shows this dynamic at work - again and again and again.

So my advice to guys is - don't cheat or step out on your wife (loyalty and supportiveness are the two biggest keys in my book to a long and healthy relationship).

BUT if you want to/do, make sure your value is so high that your wife won't leave you because she knows instinctively that she will never land a guy ever again at your level.

It is less about condoning any actions of people but more of exposing the truths.

Unfortunately PP speaks the truth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think he is telling the truth. What do I do? He said he felt excited after it happened.

Exactly. which is why 3 hours was more than enough time for sex. Hell, he was probably half done before his pants were all the way off.

[Anonymous]

Because he met her out with her friends for drinks. He walked her to her car and kissed her. My DH doesn't drink. He told me he had met her previously and given her his number and they started texting. He told me he told her he was separated. Yesterday he told me she was married and was helping her through a rough time (when i called him out on all the texts--that i saw on VZ-not on his phone) and today he told me that was a lie. She's single and just thought he was a catch. I dont think they had sex but that really is besides the point with this story.

[Anonymous]

Hugs, OP.

Chances are great they did more than just kiss till after midnight.

But you can move past this. It sounds like he's willing to do so . It won't be easy, but it is doable if you both work really, really hard at it.

[Anonymous]

Hugs, OP.

Chances are great they did more than just kiss till after midnight.

But you can move past this. It sounds like he's willing to do so . It won't be easy, but it is doable if you both work really, really hard at it.