I don't get all the frills about TTC

[Anonymous]

This reminds me that WaPost article not too long ago about infertility, and one of the focuses of the article was a woman who thought it was highly insensitive for people to post about their babies/pregnancies/whatever on FB because she was dealing with infertility. I found that whole thing so ridiculous. Hey Lady! Step away from the computer! Problem solved!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For those of u with compassion for ttc'ing people, thank you! For those judging women ttc #1 in their 40's....it is not always by first choice. I am 43 and single, and having had no luck in the romancesepartment, have been trying (unsuccessfully so far) to have a bay on my own. It was not by choice tha it I waited.

The over-40 comment was specifically aimed at women who chose this route as a result of corporate ladder-climbing. They see images of celebrity Moms over 40 and figure "I've got plenty of time". Please don't take offense where none is intended.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This reminds me that WaPost article not too long ago about infertility, and one of the focuses of the article was a woman who thought it was highly insensitive for people to post about their babies/pregnancies/whatever on FB because she was dealing with infertility. I found that whole thing so ridiculous. Hey Lady! Step away from the computer! Problem solved!

Meanwhile when this lady finally does conceive, she'd probably shout it from the FB-hilltop. Oh, the hypocrisy.

[Anonymous]

Thanks to 40.06. From the 40+ single ttc'er.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This reminds me that WaPost article not too long ago about infertility, and one of the focuses of the article was a woman who thought it was highly insensitive for people to post about their babies/pregnancies/whatever on FB because she was dealing with infertility. I found that whole thing so ridiculous. Hey Lady! Step away from the computer! Problem solved!

Meanwhile when this lady finally does conceive, she'd probably shout it from the FB-hilltop. Oh, the hypocrisy.

agreed

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't thank 14:06. She's still being unnecessarily judgmental. Now it's ok for some people to be sad about not being able to conceive because somehow it's not their fault while it is the fault of others and so we should bash and degrade them for their sadness? Because they brought it on themselves? Come on. You haven't walked in anyone else's shoes. It's easy to stand on the outside and criticize another for their choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't thank 14:06. She's still being unnecessarily judgmental. Now it's ok for some people to be sad about not being able to conceive because somehow it's not their fault while it is the fault of others and so we should bash and degrade them for their sadness? Because they brought it on themselves? Come on. You haven't walked in anyone else's shoes. It's easy to stand on the outside and criticize another for their choices.

14:06 here. Whoa, whoa, whoa.....easy. How am I being judgmental? Where have I bashed/degraded anyone?

[Anonymous]

Did you not say (or agree with those those who said) that you don't feel bad for 40+ women who are now "sitting on their laurels" after they made partner or something along those snarky lines, who bought they had "plenty of time" to start their families because they see Hollywood celebrities doing it? Sounds kind of judgmental to me. I'm just saying- you don't know why people make the choices they do. You assume things, but you really have no idea. I'm not a 40+ partner, by the way!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A woman TTC is in a frenzy. It is a natural response to all the hormones and stuff. It is natures way to continue the species. So, she is going to be sensitive and easily upset. Unfortunately most people don't understand or care about this. Human nature is very strong, regardless of whether or not we recognize it. I say give the poor ttc woman a break, and move on with your life.

Oh, bullshit! I am sick of women using "hormones" as an excuse for every damn thing in our lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you not say (or agree with those those who said) that you don't feel bad for 40+ women who are now "sitting on their laurels" after they made partner or something along those snarky lines, who bought they had "plenty of time" to start their families because they see Hollywood celebrities doing it? Sounds kind of judgmental to me. I'm just saying- you don't know why people make the choices they do. You assume things, but you really have no idea. I'm not a 40+ partner, by the way!

Are we following the same thread? Where did anyone say anything about anyone "sitting on their laurels" (do you even know what that means...because that phrase doesn't apply here)? Comments were made along the line of what you're saying re: making partner, Hollywood celebs etc, but not at all with the bitchy tone you're using.

Who's assuming anything? No one said all 40+ TTC women are those who put off starting a family for the sake of their career. You sound really defensive...it's really off-putting.

[Anonymous]

12:23 used "sit on her laurels". I didn't make it up. You're right- My tone probably is off-putting because I find this entire thread to be really nasty, starting with OP's mean-spiritedness. I didn't, however, mean to contribute to the nastiness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. As someone who has dealt with infertility, I have to say OP, you sound like a huge fucking bitch. Have a lovely life, though.

This is the problem.

If people (mainly women, sad to say) were actually happy with THEMSELVES, these issues wouldn't drag them down to such an extent that it took over their lives. I never watch what I say b/c I have friends who can deal with the blows life gives them.

I am 45 with with 2 late-in-life kids. When I got married, I was 38. If I got pregnant, great. If not, such is life. So while I can have compassion for infertile women, I am not going to enable their victim-like behavior.

My daughter is 7; she has scoliosis. The other day, before we told anyone about her condition, which was recently diagnosed, a friend made a crack about these large book bags stuffed with so many items that this generation would most likely suffer from book-induced scoliosis. Should I have yelled at her? told her off? reprimanded her for being so cruel?

Give it a break, ladies (and gentlemen)!

I'm with OP. Life is not kind. So grow a thicker skin and MOST IMPORTANTLY, like yourself - despite the hardships you may face.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you be upset about people wanting to act in a way that doesn't intentionally hurt the feelings of someone else?

It's called being polite -- you fucking bitch.

I must remember this - that being polite includes calling someone a fucking bitch.

[Anonymous]

Why do people like OP create an "enlighten me" thread that seems oddly vicious? If you really want to know the answer, then fucking google it. If you want to gossip, then just say you want to gossip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I ask the same question about SN children. Why does everyone have to walk on egg shells with them? They and their parents can do no wrong and everyone else has to put up with them.

Exactly!

I'll say from experience that my friends with SN children actually APPRECIATE being around other parents who will treat their SN kids the same way they'd treat their own.