Whats the big deal about being old money?

[Anonymous]

You sound like a nice person, OP. Don't worry for a minute about this. I say live life however you wish. If that means fountains with peeing cherubs, great. If it means a beat-up Volvo, great. Whatever makes you and your family happy!

In the meantime, stick with being kind and considerate and choose friends who are the same. Teach your children to live the values that go you here -- to work hard, as you and your husband undoubtedly have, and to be kind and supportive of others.

If people want to look down on you because of your "new" money or your husband's education, don't sweat it. As your mom would probably tell you, they're not people you want to be friends with anyway.

[Anonymous]

Any money-- new or old is better than no money.

I respect those that earned it vs inherited it- but I don't outright hate somebody if they did inherit it (unless they are douchebags or act like Paris Hilton).

[Anonymous]

new money means, you are just one generation away from poor white trash. That's it. That is all they see. Move to the west coast and you will be celebrated for your new money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a nice person, OP. Don't worry for a minute about this. I say live life however you wish. If that means fountains with peeing cherubs, great. If it means a beat-up Volvo, great. Whatever makes you and your family happy!

In the meantime, stick with being kind and considerate and choose friends who are the same. Teach your children to live the values that go you here -- to work hard, as you and your husband undoubtedly have, and to be kind and supportive of others.

If people want to look down on you because of your "new" money or your husband's education, don't sweat it. As your mom would probably tell you, they're not people you want to be friends with anyway.

I agree with the intent of this post and most of what the poster said . . . just maybe reconsider the part about fountains with the peeing cherubs! Actually, there's an old expression, "Class will tell." I've seen people from all walks of life conduct themselves with class. Then there are those who don't care about such things and don't even try.

[Anonymous]

Most people don't care who is new / old money. The only ones that do are the small subset of both groups. Both are tack for caring.

[Anonymous]

•tacky

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:new money means, you are just one generation away from poor white trash. That's it. That is all they see. Move to the west coast and you will be celebrated for your new money.

Old money could be one generation away from PWT (God, I hate that expression) as well when they squander it with their coke habit (or whatever vice). I knew these old money kids growing up. They were nothing special. Just lucky in the family lottery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought old Volvos, especially the station wagon type, are classic OM.

Only on DCUM..in reality OM only takes the bus but splurges on metro for special occasions...come on, how else would they have preserved their assets!

[Anonymous]

Just be kind, don't talk about money and use good manners. I think sometimes people who grew up poor didn't learn certain social graces. Nothing you can do about it except be as polite as possible and learn from those people who you think have outstanding manners. Maybe you aren't in this category and if that's the case - great. There are also "social graces"classes for adults if this is an issue.

I grew up middle class/upper middle class and my husband grew up a few notches above that. I've observed how my Mil entertains and how his family does certain things. When in Rome, do as the romans.

[Anonymous]

Yes, class/good breeding is more important than money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, class/good breeding is more important than money.

Are you talking about Labrador Retrievers or people? What a fucking stupid post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Old Money is a way of thinking and acting, simple. Old Money is not presumptuous, it is definitely not concerned with others business, it is down to earth, it is above trying to make others look bad (lest it be obvious you are the bad apple!) or pretending you don't know something (about someone) in an effort to obtain more information.

New Money is well, obvious. It is loud about the wrong things.

this is part of it I think ... in many cases "old money" or "new money" with sense of proportion/taste lives in a way that would advertise that ... preferable to live in a $800k house w/ little leverage and 6-10 times that in savings/invested than to live in a $1.5M house leveraged to the hilt, for ex. The secret to financial success and early retirement is low overhead (in relation to whatever your resources are).

The heck w/ snobs & social climbers in either "new" or "old" money circles, there will always be people with more money than taste and the challenge is to rise above that and be better than that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, class/good breeding is more important than money.

Are you talking about Labrador Retrievers or people? What a fucking stupid post.

Ah, yes, and here is class personified.

[Anonymous]

"The heck w/ snobs & social climbers in either "new" or "old" money circles, there will always be people with more money than taste and the challenge is to rise above that and be better than that."

Some one who gets it. It has nothing to do with old Volvos, BTW. Though old money often does drive "paid for" cars, and is defnintely not buying a new car every few years (for example).

OP seems to have left out "WANNA BE" money - those who claim to have this or that, or X amount of money, those who live to keep up with the Joneses ("if I just had this or that" when in truth I'll never be happy) those who don't think twice about who they offend....rather mistakenly!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do any of you actually use the terms "Old Money" and "New Money" in your real-life, non DCUM-forum conversations?

Only in discussing with my husband whether to move to Potomac (we didn't). I've never uttered those words to another soul except my husband, and it is always in the "flashy" context.

One thing that I think got lost on the CCC thread (although I may have missed a post) is that there was a time when this is how the world worked - you belonged to a certain club, you did business there, you inherited some money along the way - maybe many generations back is where the big money was, but there is still enough now to belong to the club and so on. You still see this kind of dynamic - or did 10-15 years ago anyway - in some of the smaller cities in the South. One of the reasons DH and I chose to move away from there many years ago (I'm a Yankee, so it's his home) was because we didn't want the most consuming decisions of the next five years to be whether we joined the old club or not (the new one would never have been an option for us given his "old" family) and whether, despite having married a fairly accomplished and outspoken women as compared to the junior leaguers his friends married, he would nevertheless join the males-only-for-lunch eating club his father belongs to (yes, eating clubs exist outside of Harvard or Yale) or risk being cut out of some business by refusing. There are still places that are that way today. Thank heavens DC isn't one of them. Whenever we talk about whether we should return to be closer to family, we think about what it would mean to raise our two daughters in a place like that, and we drop the idea in about two seconds. I don't want the most important achievement of my daughter's life to be her debutante ball, and in places like that it is the biggest thing to many women of a certain social standing. We much prefer being DC nobodies who don't belong anywhere.