Whats the big deal about being old money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
The term "old money" is meant to convey the quiet that surrounds families who are accustomed to having wealth. The PP who said it's just not a big deal is spot on.

It's not a literal chronology, but a way of relating to material things and how you present yourself.

I think key to this "old money" business is the idea of a truly wealthy person being really down to earth about it. Ever been to one of your children's friend's houses only to find early-American artwork and Chippendale furniture? I have. The easy-going nature of the family and the fact that they weren't showy and had the attitude of "we've got nothing to prove" was incredibly impressive. For me, this spirit fills the notion of "old money" no matter when it accrued.

"New money" carries with it the idea of desperation, the need to impress, flashiness, and a shallow measure of others. It is NOT about when you earned your money. In some ways, I guess it's about confidence. Maybe some people would say it reflects values.

To answer your question about "good breeding"----geesh, no. DC is not that kind of town and anyone who actually says the word "breeding" has just shown you that they are not a true elite. If you look at the lives of, for example, former Georgetown Salon Society, they all had achievements to speak for them, along with whatever family name they carried. Publishing, politics, etc.

The PP who mentioned the intense value placed on education was correct. Even among the named families (I mean, really established "old money" families) there's a line drawn between the young women who attend rigorous schools vs horsey schools.

Take care of your family, make friends, enjoy life. Please don't get bogged down in this silly madness.

Nice fantasy. Unfortunately old money does put a chronology on it. It's a fact. No one goes around calling any technology billionaire "Old Money", no matter what they do with their fortune or in their personal life. Lots of people are "down to earth".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Nice fantasy. Unfortunately old money does put a chronology on it. It's a fact. No one goes around calling any technology billionaire "Old Money", no matter what they do with their fortune or in their personal life. Lots of people are "down to earth".

Sure to your last 2 sentences. But the point is, nobody is going around calling technology millionaires/billionaires "new money" either, unless they act a certain show-offy, bragging way.

"New Money," as a descriptor, has a very clear meaning to most people: flashy and tacky. We can probably all agree on what "New Money" is - flashy, tacky, talking about how much money you have and where it came from.

Whereas there's a lot of disagreement about what "old money" means. It doesn't mean Mayflower, because those guys were poor, as someone else pointed out. It probably doesn't mean staying at Valley Forge with George Washington, because that money's all gone now, and anyway the Washingtons and Adamses were never super rich (can you tell I did history). One PP here thinks you must have fought at Bosworth with Henry VII or at Waterloo with Wellington (that history major again), so that your title dates back centuries. But we don't have titles here in the US. And there's no longer a "well bred club" whose kids get all the spots at Groton and then all the spots at Yale - those days are over, those days died in the 1960s, and thank goodness.

When people talk about "old money," they don't mean a white shoe "club" any more. They mean either:
(1) inherited wealth. If your car dealer daddy left you a trust fund, and you don't tell anybody, then nobody's the wiser.
(2) a mindset. Honestly, I get irritated by anybody who brags about their money and shows it off, no matter if the money came from last year or from 5 generations ago. So I don't particularly disagree with this attitude.

OP is worried about being called "New Money." That's easy - don't show off your money or brag about where it comes from. OP isn't trying to "pass" as "Old Money" which might be a lot harder. But to spend 3 pages quibbling over what "Old Money" means and what OP would have to do to "pass" as "Old Money" is totally besides the point anyway, because she didn't say she has the remotest interest in passing for "Old Money."

[Anonymous]

Do any of you actually use the terms "Old Money" and "New Money" in your real-life, non DCUM-forum conversations?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do any of you actually use the terms "Old Money" and "New Money" in your real-life, non DCUM-forum conversations?

I was wondering the same thing. The term "New Money" gets used when somebody is really garish. But "Old Money" is rarely used, except to talk about inheritance. And on DCUM, obviously, to explain what "New Money" is not, by way of contrast.

I really doubt 15:35 knows any "old money", FWIW.

[Anonymous]

Old Money is a way of thinking and acting, simple. Old Money is not presumptuous, it is definitely not concerned with others business, it is down to earth, it is above trying to make others look bad (lest it be obvious you are the bad apple!) or pretending you don't know something (about someone) in an effort to obtain more information.

New Money is well, obvious. It is loud about the wrong things.

NEITHER has to do with furniture - I have seen ugly old furniture and ugly modern furniture. Hell, anyone can go buy old furniture! And just the same, anyone could go and buy modern furniture! WTH?

Is it true (per PP) that you are trying to pass for Old Money, OP? It is impossible for NM to pass as OM. If you go to certain social functions, NOT the NM functions, you will see what I mean. There are too many intangibles to mention, but I swear, I know some people that can smell it. And it is not the NM that can. OM absolutely does NOT social climb and try to muscle in where they so obviously don't belong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Old Money is a way of thinking and acting, simple. Old Money is not presumptuous, it is definitely not concerned with others business, it is down to earth, it is above trying to make others look bad (lest it be obvious you are the bad apple!) or pretending you don't know something (about someone) in an effort to obtain more information.

New Money is well, obvious. It is loud about the wrong things.

NEITHER has to do with furniture - I have seen ugly old furniture and ugly modern furniture. Hell, anyone can go buy old furniture! And just the same, anyone could go and buy modern furniture! WTH?

Is it true (per PP) that you are trying to pass for Old Money, OP? It is impossible for NM to pass as OM. If you go to certain social functions, NOT the NM functions, you will see what I mean. There are too many intangibles to mention, but I swear, I know some people that can smell it. And it is not the NM that can. OM absolutely does NOT social climb and try to muscle in where they so obviously don't belong.

This is a joke, right? The part where you say that NM shouldn't try to "social climb" and "muscle in where they don't belong" is a joke?

OP is worried about being perceived as NM, but she never said she was interested in passing for OM. It's easy enough to avoid being called NM: just don't be brassy. It's a lot harder to pass for OM, on this we agree, but OP seems to have no interest in passing for OM, so it's irrelevant....

(BTW, if you don't get the furniture thing, then you don't get it.)

[Anonymous]

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/to-pay-or-not-to-pay-its-a-question-of-class-1687204.html

Or, fake it and buy antiques. Nobody will actually ask you if you inherited that chair, or you bought it in Antiques Row. And if they do ask you, they deserve to be lied to....

[Anonymous]

Old money = Spring Valley
New money = Great Falls

New money NEEDS to let you know that they have money. They need the oversized house, they need the loud color sports car, they need the label adorned bags and clothes. They never got their passports until they had made a lot of money (unless they were immigrants), they join subpar country clubs even though they don't know the difference between a chip and a putt and they start threads like this letting you know how wealthy they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Old Money is a way of thinking and acting, simple. Old Money is not presumptuous, it is definitely not concerned with others business, it is down to earth, it is above trying to make others look bad (lest it be obvious you are the bad apple!) or pretending you don't know something (about someone) in an effort to obtain more information.

New Money is well, obvious. It is loud about the wrong things.

NEITHER has to do with furniture - I have seen ugly old furniture and ugly modern furniture. Hell, anyone can go buy old furniture! And just the same, anyone could go and buy modern furniture! WTH?

Is it true (per PP) that you are trying to pass for Old Money, OP? It is impossible for NM to pass as OM. If you go to certain social functions, NOT the NM functions, you will see what I mean. There are too many intangibles to mention, but I swear, I know some people that can smell it. And it is not the NM that can. OM absolutely does NOT social climb and try to muscle in where they so obviously don't belong.

This is a joke, right? The part where you say that NM shouldn't try to "social climb" and "muscle in where they don't belong" is a joke?

OP is worried about being perceived as NM, but she never said she was interested in passing for OM. It's easy enough to avoid being called NM: just don't be brassy. It's a lot harder to pass for OM, on this we agree, but OP seems to have no interest in passing for OM, so it's irrelevant....

(BTW, if you don't get the furniture thing, then you don't get it.)

We get the furniture thing. We just think you're stuck up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Old Money is a way of thinking and acting, simple. Old Money is not presumptuous, it is definitely not concerned with others business, it is down to earth, it is above trying to make others look bad (lest it be obvious you are the bad apple!) or pretending you don't know something (about someone) in an effort to obtain more information.

New Money is well, obvious. It is loud about the wrong things.

NEITHER has to do with furniture - I have seen ugly old furniture and ugly modern furniture. Hell, anyone can go buy old furniture! And just the same, anyone could go and buy modern furniture! WTH?

Is it true (per PP) that you are trying to pass for Old Money, OP? It is impossible for NM to pass as OM. If you go to certain social functions, NOT the NM functions, you will see what I mean. There are too many intangibles to mention, but I swear, I know some people that can smell it. And it is not the NM that can. OM absolutely does NOT social climb and try to muscle in where they so obviously don't belong.

Ridiculous. OM not concerned with other people's business? Laughable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Old Money is a way of thinking and acting, simple. Old Money is not presumptuous, it is definitely not concerned with others business, it is down to earth, it is above trying to make others look bad (lest it be obvious you are the bad apple!) or pretending you don't know something (about someone) in an effort to obtain more information.

New Money is well, obvious. It is loud about the wrong things.

NEITHER has to do with furniture - I have seen ugly old furniture and ugly modern furniture. Hell, anyone can go buy old furniture! And just the same, anyone could go and buy modern furniture! WTH?

Is it true (per PP) that you are trying to pass for Old Money, OP? It is impossible for NM to pass as OM. If you go to certain social functions, NOT the NM functions, you will see what I mean. There are too many intangibles to mention, but I swear, I know some people that can smell it. And it is not the NM that can. OM absolutely does NOT social climb and try to muscle in where they so obviously don't belong.

Ridiculous. OM not concerned with other people's business? Laughable.

I agree, the poster you're quoting doesn't know what she's talking about. On so many different levels. She only gets the very basics right, like "new money is obvious."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Old Money is a way of thinking and acting, simple. Old Money is not presumptuous, it is definitely not concerned with others business, it is down to earth, it is above trying to make others look bad (lest it be obvious you are the bad apple!) or pretending you don't know something (about someone) in an effort to obtain more information.

New Money is well, obvious. It is loud about the wrong things.

NEITHER has to do with furniture - I have seen ugly old furniture and ugly modern furniture. Hell, anyone can go buy old furniture! And just the same, anyone could go and buy modern furniture! WTH?

Is it true (per PP) that you are trying to pass for Old Money, OP? It is impossible for NM to pass as OM. If you go to certain social functions, NOT the NM functions, you will see what I mean. There are too many intangibles to mention, but I swear, I know some people that can smell it. And it is not the NM that can. OM absolutely does NOT social climb and try to muscle in where they so obviously don't belong.

Ridiculous. OM not concerned with other people's business? Laughable.

I agree, the poster you're quoting doesn't know what she's talking about. On so many different levels. She only gets the very basics right, like "new money is obvious."

+1

Pretending like you are not trying is still trying.

[Anonymous]

Some of this "understated OM" business is hogwash. My good friend is totally new money - her father is the CEO of a major software company. Her classmates didn't know she was wealthy, and thought she was a financial aid kid at her high school . She was basically an outcast, even her high school yearbook had a jab about her crappy car (volvo) as opposed to everyone else's BMW's. Local paper reported highest earning CEO's, her father's name is on the last and BAM. Suddenly old money is nice to her. Understated old money, indeed! Those kids had some AWESOME values instilled in them.

[Anonymous]

I don't get this. The new money with BMWs didn't appreciate her old Volvo? She was an outcast because the other NM kids didn't realize she was just like them, or for some other reason?

[Anonymous]

I thought old Volvos, especially the station wagon type, are classic OM.