I wanted to throw my son out the window...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I am a nanny. I live in ffx county. I have plenty of experience with newborns, I have fantastic references, and I currently nanny for a Pediatrician.
If you don't mind a stranger helping you, I wouldn't mind helping out for a few hours on a weekend, so you can sleep.

Would you do that for free?

Yes, sorry I thought I put that in my post.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP,

wow, hang in there. your feelings are normal. i would be at the end of my rope much sooner than you.

i would make sure its not reflux (is it whining? discomfort, etc?

age 6 weeks is the worst, we turned the corner at 2.5 months.

dumb questin but have you tried a swing?

for us, swing and prevacid helped immensely.

[Anonymous]

also I undersetand that dad moved out, but how are thigns betwen you two? anychance you'd be comfortable with him coming over and caring for baby for a long stretch while you caught up on some sleep?

[Anonymous]

OP, have you tried the moby wrap? It honestly was the only thing that saved us in those early days, and it took me 2 months to remember I had it!

[Anonymous]

OP, I am so sorry for you - having a baby was so hard on me and I had a husband to help (somewhat). I thought the exhaustion and ppd were going to kill me.

I hope there is someone, someone, who can help you - MIL, your mom, sister, friends? If not then yes I would suggest you set up that email address and get some dcum mommy help. Maybe we can run background checks on people or something. I am an HR person so maybe I can help you with that part.

Can you move in with someone for a year so you don't have to go back to work? It's going to be so hard to try to work and mother and SLEEP. Obviously when you planned to have a baby you planned to have a partner. Shame on him!

[Anonymous]

Wow! Sounds like you are doing an amazing job. And you have my deepest admiration for doing this all solo. I agree with the others about getting a little help. A nap, a break or just walking around the grocery store alone goes a long way.

[Anonymous]

NP here. I would recommend using a wrap or a sling and keeping the baby upright on you for 1/2 hour to 1 hour after eating. If he is that little and whining, it is probably reflux related to the formula. If you can afford it, try switching to a sensitive formula (they break the cow milk protein down into smaller bits that are easier for the baby to digest).

With the wrap, I would sit on your couch, put your feet up on a coffee table or other chair, prop pillows against your sides, and sleep with the baby on your front. I did this for a while with our baby and it really helped. When I woke up I would just transfer us both to bed; if I didn't wake up until he did, we would both just sleep on the couch.

For safety, make sure that the baby's head is fully out of the wrap; I would put the sling or fabric around his back and under his arms rather than up over the shoulders. As a person whose baby slept on me for months, I think this should be safe, especially for a week or so until you both get more rest.

[Anonymous]

Wrap, swing, swaddle, reflux. I went through the same things. It will get better. Get some help! Take a day or two away and don't feel bad about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi, OP. Your situation sounds hellish. I've BTDT. At one point I would rather have chewed my own arms off than get out of bed to deal with my baby in the night yet again. I have been in your shoes and lived to tell the tale, and I would like to help someone else who is now going through it too. If you are willing to leave an anonymous contact email of some kind, I would be happy to help you out somehow -- running errands, even last minute, or cleaning your bathrooms, cutting the grass (not that great at it, frankly, but better than nothing) or whatever you need that your DH is not helping you with. Not forever obviously but until you are out of this really difficult time and on your feet. I know that is not what DCUM is all about so if my offer seems weird to you and you choose to ignore it, I totally understand. Good luck to you and your baby either way.

NP here. I agree that this is definitely one of the nicest posts I've seen on here. And, honestly, OP if you live in MoCo and want to post an anonymous contact email, I'd be willing to help out also.

Or, like the PPs said, definitely reach out to any friends you have in the area. I guarantee that someone would want to help.

I really hope things get better soon OP. The first 6 months are tough. And, you've had it even tougher. Hang in there!

[Anonymous]

OP, I just wanted to post and say that my gut tells me the offers of help on this board are sincere, and people would feel really happy about pitching in to help someone who so obviously needs and deserves a hand. When the time comes, you can return the favor to someone else.

If you don't feel comfortable accepting the help of anonymous poster, ask your friends. They will be delighted to be of use to you. I know I would feel so good if a friend asked me and I could help her.

[Anonymous]

I agree that the outpouring of genuine anxious concerned parents who have lived the h*ll that a newborn can bring is heartwarming.

Whether OP is going to avail or not, I want to provide some suggestions for resources. We've all had an evening when we wanted to kill our child. Mine was the teething/husband travelling/diaper rash fiasco that had me in the ER I was so desperate for my child to stop crying. But before you ever cross over any kind of line, CALL your friends and family and tell them how desperate you are and how much you need their help to take your LO for a walk so you can take a nap and get some rest.

If you truly have no one who can help, call a hotline:
To learn more about child abuse prevention, call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-4-A-CHILD® (1-800-422-4453). The 24-hour hotline is staffed with professional counselors who offer information about child abuse prevention as well as crisis intervention, literature, and referrals to thousands of emergency, social service and support resources.

Talk to your pediatrican during next appointment.

It is really stressful. I am not judging. Just hoping to put some solid information out there.

[Anonymous]

I would be happy to help set up a fund to hire a night nurse if others are willing to contribute as well...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be happy to help set up a fund to hire a night nurse if others are willing to contribute as well...

This is probably the best way to go, because then OP wont' have a bunch of strangers traipsing around. I would definitely contribute.

[Anonymous]

i am concerned that the op hasn't responded. are you okay?

[Anonymous]

She's probably exhausted! Hope she checks soon