Forum Index
»
Off-Topic
can't believe it, but i still don't know if i am invited to my friend's wedding
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
OP here.
No answer yet, but I wanted to respond to 13:14's comment (and others) about my friendship with her... I totally see your point, but I have chalked this whole perceived situation to the fact that my friend is a a very free spirit and wouldn't know or care what Ms. Manners says. Case and point - she's getting married on the beach on a far-away island, without attendants and with a local officiant; doesn't want a bridal shower or to register, and may (or may not) have spoken of her wedding plans thinking her friends wouldn't be offended by knowing they weren't invited. I'm not offended by the whole thing, but to be fair, I didn't know about half of these etiquette gaffs until I got married myself. |
Anonymous
|
I haven't read through all the responses but a similar situation happened to me - but perhaps appeared even worse to my friend. I was the bride and a good friend of mine had been invited and attended my bridal shower etc - so when it came time for invites they all went out but I guess hers got lost in the mail. I only found out when I reached out to her after the RSVP deadline to see if she was coming.
I can only imagine what she must have been thinking and felt totally embarassed even though it obviously wasn't my fault that the invite got lost. Luckily mine was not a destination wedding and local for her so she didn't have to coordinate flights or a hotel room ahead of time - because I would have been really upset if the late/missing invite meant she couldn't come. Hopefully when you reach out to her you will realize a similar situation. Good luck! |
Anonymous
| Maybe too late, but couldn't you have a mutual friend casually ask, "oh, hey is X invited?" |
Anonymous
| (case IN point) |
Anonymous
| well.....????? |
Anonymous
| the suspense is killing me. |
Anonymous
|
Update?
If you haven't heard anything by now, it is not looking good.... |
Anonymous
|
OP,
I don't get it. Why don't you just ask her? Your waiting could cost you hundreds in airfare. You might be missing the better rates. If you are invited. And if you are not, you can deal with that. ASK! |
Anonymous
What I don't get, is why you feel the need to respond obviously before reading all of the responses.. She sent an email out yesterday and is waiting for a response.. Had you read the whole thread, you would know that and obviously wouldn't have posted your little know it all reply. |
Anonymous
|
OP here.
She responded back and said she was sorry there was a misunderstanding, but that she thought she was clear to her friends that the wedding was small (essentially only family); that some of her friends had asked for save-the-date cards and so she gave some to her close friends. She added that she would love to have us come if we could, because some folks have cancelled coming, and that she had further assumed we wouldn't come because we have a child (finding someone to watch her, etc.) She says she knows it's late notice, but would love it if we would come, etc., etc. |
Anonymous
| I think OP is a very open and accepting person to be able to be friends with someone so self-absorbed. I assume that she's worth the effort for some reason. |
Anonymous
| OP, I've been following your drama and I have to say, "blech" on your friend. I'm glad she was honest with you, but sending save the dates to friends as some form of memento is just wacky. Plan to send her a nice present, skip the trip and find something else fun to do for a vacation with your family. Hopefully she'll stop involving you in drama/planning from this point on. |
Anonymous
|
I seriously hope you drop her as a friend. Apparently it was NOT obvious that b/c it is such a small wedding that friends were not invited. Why the heck do you give someone a save the date card who you are not planning on inviting; especially since you didn't ask for one?!?!
Ugh, what a rude and totally klassy person |
Anonymous
| Wowzers. Your friend is a mega-douche. And I agree with 12:48. |
Anonymous
| This woman sounds like a complete freak-show. So, she gave you a save-the-date, even though you didn't need to save the date, because you weren't invited, but now that you mention it, she's had some cancellations, so you can take one of their spots? I hope you don't waste your money on this wedding! |