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can't believe it, but i still don't know if i am invited to my friend's wedding
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Anonymous
| I don't necessarily think the save the date is a slam dunk meaning invitation yes. It's odd that she didn't mail it to you or at least have it in an envelope. It's almost as if she just wanted you to see what they looked like. It could be that you definitely are invited and she feels like she doesn't even have to address it, but it's vague enough that I wouldn't know either. Weird. Be sure to update when the invitations are sent to tell us whether you got one! |
Anonymous
| she gave you a save the date. you're invited. |
Anonymous
|
One of my guy friends told me that his wedding would be Memorial Day weekend and I should go ahead and book my plane tickets, since there was a good deal. And then I wasn't invited!! (I figured they had space issues and his wife overruled.) Ah well, dh and I had a nice weekend away!
So who knows? But I do err on the side of you being invited, but I would just ask. |
Anonymous
| OP, I'm going to assume you're invited. But of course, YOU should not assume. Just ask! |
Anonymous
| I think you're invited, but if you're planning to go definitely ask so you can make your travel plans early. I would only wait for the invite to clarify this if you know you're not going either way. |
Anonymous
| OP, why don't you want to ask her? If she says anything other than "Yes, of course!" then it will be awkward, but that's her fault for talking to you about it constantly and giving you a save the date, for God's sake. It seems like the balance is off in this friendship if you don't feel like you can ask her. |
Anonymous
|
OP here.
Thanks for all of the responses... you've made some earnest suggestions that I simply ask the friend. I'll give it another couple of weeks and then perhaps ask... I just can't seem to bring myself to ask outright. Of course, next weekend we are hosting her and her fiancé for a celebratory dinner (just us 4) for their engagement. I'll try to get the answer out of her then. |
Anonymous
| It sounds like she didn't mail out the invites yet. You said it was a spring wedding - it's only January! |
Anonymous
| Well.. please update us when you find out for sure. I'm getting really curious. |
Anonymous
|
OP here.
We had the couple over for dinner recently, where they shared yet more wedding plans, including that they have begun to receive rsvp cards... so I will take that as confirmation that we were in fact not invited. I still maintain that the save-the-date told me we would receive an invitation... so I wonder if there is any point / any polite way to mention that to my friend?... but I don't want to be a jerk, so I should probably let it lie. |
Anonymous
Srsly, you should ask her. The invitation may have been lost in the mail. Is she a close friend? |
Anonymous
|
My guess is that she isn't naming you because she doesn't want to assume you are coming - and is avoiding asking you. But it is weird. I have to imagine the Save the Date card seals it, but its strange she didn't mail it.
I cannot even fathom someone including a friend so much and not inviting them. Honestly, given it means travel plans to Hawaii, I'd ask. Or at least try to feel it out some more. |
Anonymous
| I bet your invitation got lost in the mail and she's bringing up RSVPs in front of you because she hasn't heard from you yet. Be a big kid and ask. |
Anonymous
|
People who talk about events they are planning in front of you when they have no intention of inviting you, are letting you know they think NOTHING of you. They are not friends. They are rudely assuming that you are fine with being disregarded, so they will go on disregarding you for as long as you allow it.
Stop being there for this "friend". |
Anonymous
|
this is funny. ask her.
should be a sit-com episode. |