Politcal disagreement with friends - when is it too hard to stay friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Knew 100% before I opened the thread that the problem with a friend not sharing your political views was coming from someone on the tolerant left.

There is no equating both sides here given the negative economic and social impact of Christian nationalism. Not seeing that is its own form of TDS.

Most rational people are and should be far more concerned about radical Islamic terrorism and the highly disproportionate level of violence of young black males. Last time I checked it wasn't Christian. nationalism beheading people in Ireland nor murdering teenagers with knives at high school track meets

LOL, check the facts, my friend. Domestically, you are quite wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey Troll, pretty poor obvious attempt.

I don’t think it’s a troll. I have a casual acquaintance like this.

In casual catch-up conversations, she’ll act surprised when someone shares news of a neighbor who is retiring early, has lost a grant or a job or is concerned for their future employment.

I don’t know what world she lives in… her DH is a former Federal worker. We live near DC with neighbors in the armed forces, at the State Dept., NIH, DOJ, EPA and Education…. I don’t know what world she lives in!

I don’t know if she’s ignorant or pretending that people are not impacted by the Administration.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you differ from your friends politcally, you have to either stop discussing politics entirely or reahc a level of comfort in the inbetween - where you can joke, or see the other side, or at least understand the other person. t a minimum, you have to know what they believe how they will respond and not engage.

You know how your friend feels about gov't workers - so this is not a friend you can go to with worries about losing your job or other pressures feds are under. Is the person a good enough friend otherwise? That's what you have to decide.

I have my high school reunion this weekend. I'm from a rural area that is extremely red. I'm pretty blue and have been since I was a kid. We all know this about each other, even not having seen some of them for decades. No one is going to bring up politics (I don't think). Or if anyone does, I will smile blandly and ask about their mom, what are their kids doing, what do they do for fun, etc etc. You just have to put it to the side.

In my friend’s case— and my parents’ case— I’d prefer to challenge THEM to put their devotion to Trump and his policies that go after the people they don’t like (Democrats, federal workers and minorities) aside.

They're all bad people, OP. Every single one of them. Fundamentally bad people who hate America and everything it stands for.

My husbands entire department at a Treasury subagency was just told they are being RIFed and lady I am going to pray for you. You are a provoking thesr fights

But here's the thing- I know exactly who and what these people are now. Discussing Trump's crystal clear corruption and how they respond to it is a litmus test. Or in my family's case, sharing first hand account with them of how Orange Julius Caesar is impacting our financial stability is a litmus test.

As a result, I have a crystal clear understanding of what they are. They are people who would cheer on your bad news. I wouldn't call them all bad people, not at all. But not being a bad person doesn't automatically default to being a good person. So, these aren't good people. And life is short, so it's probably best to get those type of people out of my life. Sorry, no, they do not have my blessing to say they care about me or love your kids while cheering on bad things happening to my family. I can't accept that and protect them from themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Knew 100% before I opened the thread that the problem with a friend not sharing your political views was coming from someone on the tolerant left.

There is no equating both sides here given the negative economic and social impact of Christian nationalism. Not seeing that is its own form of TDS.

Most rational people are and should be far more concerned about radical Islamic terrorism and the highly disproportionate level of violence of young black males. Last time I checked it wasn't Christian. nationalism beheading people in Ireland nor murdering teenagers with knives at high school track meets

Rational people are able to ascertain risk. Christian fundamentalists have literally infiltrated our government (all branches), local and state governments, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Knew 100% before I opened the thread that the problem with a friend not sharing your political views was coming from someone on the tolerant left.

There is no equating both sides here given the negative economic and social impact of Christian nationalism. Not seeing that is its own form of TDS.

Most rational people are and should be far more concerned about radical Islamic terrorism and the highly disproportionate level of violence of young black males. Last time I checked it wasn't Christian. nationalism beheading people in Ireland nor murdering teenagers with knives at high school track meets

LOL, check the facts, my friend. Domestically, you are quite wrong.

Racist xenophobia DGAF about facts. Brown people are responsible for all “concerning” behavior.

[Anonymous]

^xenophobes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First of all, I think Trump and his MAGA cult pose a threat to our country’s freedom, functioning, and survival. Politically, I think they should absolutely be opposed.

Personally, I wouldn’t sacrifice relationships over politics. While I’m sure it’s hard not to take comments personally, when you are personally suffering from serious effects like worrying about potential job loss, I think you should try to summon whatever grace you can muster to recognize that those types of comments from a friend were probably made from oblivious ignorance rather than any type of malicious intent. Find areas of common ground to discuss, even if it means avoiding political discussion altogether. People are more important than politics. Fundamentally, politics should serve the interests of people, rather than vice versa.

Politically, I think we’ll be more effective at turning people against Trump by being friends that share common values and interests. Instead of attacking people like your friend, use the common ground to show where Trump is opposing HER priorities. At the same time, be an honest broker and admit when a Democrat says or does something boneheaded and/or corrupt. If she thinks you have been brainwashed by “DEI” liberals and have “Trump Derangement Syndrome”, she’ll just dig in and resist everything you say. If she considers you a reasonable person who she can identify with, she’s more likely to consider your viewpoint, and perhaps be eventually deprogrammed from the MAGA cult.

I hope both you and your husband are able to retain your jobs. It seems like between the rift with Musk and Trump’s short attention span, he’s currently more focused on other priorities. Unfortunately, he’s already managed to wreak havoc on both the individual lives of the workers who were fired and on the functioning of the government which consequently weakens the nation. It will be years before we fully appreciate the cost of Trump’s cuts, the recent screwworm threat being just one example.

I'm the opposite. I cannot find any common ground with Trump maga supporters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey Troll, pretty poor obvious attempt.

Why do you think it's a troll? My spouse dropped a long time friend who supported Trump. This friend is a bit racist, too. Said something to me that was obviously racist, but I never told my spouse about it because I didn't want to ruin that friendship. After my spouse dumped the friend, I told my spouse about the racist comment.

We are a biracial couple with children. My spouse said they cannot stomach being friends with anyone who would support a racist pos, a crook, immoral a$$hat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey Troll, pretty poor obvious attempt.

I don’t think it’s a troll. I have a casual acquaintance like this.

In casual catch-up conversations, she’ll act surprised when someone shares news of a neighbor who is retiring early, has lost a grant or a job or is concerned for their future employment.

I don’t know what world she lives in… her DH is a former Federal worker. We live near DC with neighbors in the armed forces, at the State Dept., NIH, DOJ, EPA and Education…. I don’t know what world she lives in!

I don’t know if she’s ignorant or pretending that people are not impacted by the Administration.

She's one of those, "He doesn't mean me... he means those other lazy feds and bloated agencies." These people are kind of sociopaths IMO.

FWIW, I'm not a fed.

[Anonymous]

This exact OP content seems very familiar to a recent thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Knew 100% before I opened the thread that the problem with a friend not sharing your political views was coming from someone on the tolerant left.

Oh, look, the "why won't you tolerate my intolerance, you hypocrite" whine, with all its irony.

[Anonymous]

When I lived in the south (Tennessee, not even sure Deep South) women would say “I’ll pray for you” with a smile and it meant the same thing as saying “Go F$&!# yourself!” in other parts of the country.

MAGA women are supposed to be bleach blonde Christian trad wives. “I’ll pray for you” has become a way to sweetly tell people you hate them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey Troll, pretty poor obvious attempt.

Why do you think it's a troll? My spouse dropped a long time friend who supported Trump. This friend is a bit racist, too. Said something to me that was obviously racist, but I never told my spouse about it because I didn't want to ruin that friendship. After my spouse dumped the friend, I told my spouse about the racist comment.

We are a biracial couple with children. My spouse said they cannot stomach being friends with anyone who would support a racist pos, a crook, immoral a$$hat.

Ofc he has to tell you what he thinks you want to hear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey Troll, pretty poor obvious attempt.

Why do you think it's a troll? My spouse dropped a long time friend who supported Trump. This friend is a bit racist, too. Said something to me that was obviously racist, but I never told my spouse about it because I didn't want to ruin that friendship. After my spouse dumped the friend, I told my spouse about the racist comment.

We are a biracial couple with children. My spouse said they cannot stomach being friends with anyone who would support a racist pos, a crook, immoral a$$hat.

Ofc he has to tell you what he thinks you want to hear.

? wdym?

My spouse is the one who constantly complains about Trump, so much so that it gets me worked up so I have to tell them to stop telling me all the awful sh(t Trump is doing. Spouse wants to leave the country because of Trump/MAGA.

[Anonymous]

This whole “you should stay friends so you can convince them” is kind of silly.

First of all, if living thru *this* isn’t enough then nothing I can say will get thru to them. Farmers have been screwed by Trump as much as anyone and 90% of them when interviewed say “I trust he’s got a plan— if we just give him time this will all work out for the better”. I mean if there is one thing Trump has never had, it’s a plan. My friend like this knows where to find me if she wakes up and wants to talk.

Second, it’s not my responsibility to subject myself to this nonsense on the off chance that today will be the day that reality starts to seep in. If it’s not personally painful to you to have these conversations then by all means have them but I think the premise of this whole discussion is that for some us these exchanges are hurtful and saying “get over it — you care about these things too much” might work for you but it doesn’t for me.

Despite what these right wingers want you to think, empathy is a virtue not a sin and if you don’t have any that’s your problem not mine.