Neighbor kid calls me by my first name — rude?

[Anonymous]

It's a Southern thing to think Southern culture is more "respectful". It's not-- it's just different. Nobody's trying to disrespect you just by doing their own culture rather than yours. Just like if I brought whoopie pies or a maple custard pie to a potluck, or called a hoagie a grinder. I'm not doing it to be rude. It's just what's normal in my culture. You shouldn't expect me to be of your culture just because you're nearby.

[Anonymous]

It's not rude if you did not tell him what you prefer to be called.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is regional, not generational.

I cringe when someone calls me Miss First Name.

Same. I see why - we need something between Mrs Lastname and just the first name, but this compromise isn’t it for me. I wasn’t raised in the south.

But the mid-atlantic is basically the south. You have to go with what is common where you live. This is common in the DMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not rude if you did not tell him what you prefer to be called.

And even then, kids make mistakes. It's hard for a kid to remember the name preferences of all the adults they encounter, especially if they don't see you every day. I think it's only rude if the intention is to be rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is regional, not generational.

I cringe when someone calls me Miss First Name.

Same. I see why - we need something between Mrs Lastname and just the first name, but this compromise isn’t it for me. I wasn’t raised in the south.

But the mid-atlantic is basically the south. You have to go with what is common where you live. This is common in the DMV.

The compromise is Ms. First name, or Ms. Initial. My name is similar to "Przybieciwicz" so I've been "Ms. P" forever. Even to adults.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do kids on the west coast call their teachers by their first name too?

Usually not although some teachers prefer that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unclench those butt cheeks OP

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do kids on the west coast call their teachers by their first name too?

Usually not although some teachers prefer that.

It depends on the school and its policies. If it's a Quaker or Progressive school, first names.

I think at Two Rivers here they do first names, or at least they did?

[Anonymous]

I don’t have strong feelings about last names but it is crazy to just be mad and not say anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a Southern thing to think Southern culture is more "respectful". It's not-- it's just different. Nobody's trying to disrespect you just by doing their own culture rather than yours. Just like if I brought whoopie pies or a maple custard pie to a potluck, or called a hoagie a grinder. I'm not doing it to be rude. It's just what's normal in my culture. You shouldn't expect me to be of your culture just because you're nearby.

Southern gentility has always been a thin veneer over violent oppression anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a Southern thing to think Southern culture is more "respectful". It's not-- it's just different. Nobody's trying to disrespect you just by doing their own culture rather than yours. Just like if I brought whoopie pies or a maple custard pie to a potluck, or called a hoagie a grinder. I'm not doing it to be rude. It's just what's normal in my culture. You shouldn't expect me to be of your culture just because you're nearby.

Southern gentility has always been a thin veneer over violent oppression anyway.

Exactly. It's not really about politeness, it's a constant need for reassurance of one's superior place in the hierarchy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I moved to the west coast and this is the norm in my city. It was hard to adapt to and I cared a lot for a while but I’m used to it now. I don’t care anymore and am not sure why I ever was bothered by it.

Maybe they’re from elsewhere? If it bothers you I agree that you need to give the kid another option for what to call you. They’re not going to read your mind.

I'm from the West Coast. This is normal for the West Coast. It's not a sign of rudeness. The kid isn't trying to bother you.

If you're in the DMV, however, most people do titles. It's fine to correct the kid and say something like "Most kids call me (preferred name). Can you call me (preferred name)."

I'm in the DMV and most kids don't use titles in our circle. We live in Arlington, if that matters. I never expect a child to call me Ms. It's completely your right to correct a child and ask them to call you something else, but I will make fun of you when I hear that you've done it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is regional, not generational.

I cringe when someone calls me Miss First Name.

Same. I see why - we need something between Mrs Lastname and just the first name, but this compromise isn’t it for me. I wasn’t raised in the south.

But the mid-atlantic is basically the south. You have to go with what is common where you live. This is common in the DMV.

No it’s not. I grew up here. Kids call me by my first name, and I like it.

The only name I correct is when someone calls me so-and-so’s mom. I tell them that they should call me by either my first name or Mrs. Last name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is regional, not generational.

I cringe when someone calls me Miss First Name.

Same. I see why - we need something between Mrs Lastname and just the first name, but this compromise isn’t it for me. I wasn’t raised in the south.

But the mid-atlantic is basically the south. You have to go with what is common where you live. This is common in the DMV.

No it’s not. I grew up here. Kids call me by my first name, and I like it.

The only name I correct is when someone calls me so-and-so’s mom. I tell them that they should call me by either my first name or Mrs. Last name.

That's funny, I always loved it when my kids' friends called me that! So sweet. I miss it now that they are adults.

[Anonymous]

[mastodon]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is regional, not generational.

I cringe when someone calls me Miss First Name.

Same. I see why - we need something between Mrs Lastname and just the first name, but this compromise isn’t it for me. I wasn’t raised in the south.

But the mid-atlantic is basically the south. You have to go with what is common where you live. This is common in the DMV.

No it’s not. I grew up here. Kids call me by my first name, and I like it.

The only name I correct is when someone calls me so-and-so’s mom. I tell them that they should call me by either my first name or Mrs. Last name.

What a control freak uou are