Nanny bringing child on vacation with us

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re going on a vacation, can afford to bring your nanny, and worried about the cost of her daughter’s meals?

There are all types of trash humans in the world! OP being one of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. As additional context, the nanny and her husband live together with their kids. The kids who still live at home are high school aged or older. My impression is the DD simply would like to join her mom on this trip. Nanny contract does not require vacation work, so this is an additional request. This would have no impact on vacation to which she is otherwise entitled. We take more than one vacation per year, and she'll have time off the next time we vacation without her, in addition to other time off to which she's entitled.

Side note, I am chuckling at the suggestion that people who have means to live comfortably are not entitled to try to save money where they can.

Sounds like you can say no to the daughter coming and the nanny can decide whether or not she wants to come based on that information.

Agreed. I was leaning towards bringing the girl, but she has a father at home and she’s in high school. OP can say no, and the nanny can decide whether she wants to come. If the nanny was a single mother who lacked family to watch the teen at night, it might be different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. As additional context, the nanny and her husband live together with their kids. The kids who still live at home are high school aged or older. My impression is the DD simply would like to join her mom on this trip. Nanny contract does not require vacation work, so this is an additional request. This would have no impact on vacation to which she is otherwise entitled. We take more than one vacation per year, and she'll have time off the next time we vacation without her, in addition to other time off to which she's entitled.

Side note, I am chuckling at the suggestion that people who have means to live comfortably are not entitled to try to save money where they can.

Side note - I am chuckling at your implied suggestion that the nanny's kids don't have the right to want to spend time with their mom. Nanny should turn you down.

[Anonymous]

I’d want to meet the teen first before I committed. If she’s generally easy to be around I’d probably say yes.

[Anonymous]

OP, never post nanny questions in here. You just get a lot of bitter shrews who can't afford to take a nanny on vacation with them anyway. Compounded with weird assumptions like the nanny not having anyone to watch her kids, etc.

No, don't take the teen with you. Your nanny can either accept the additional work or not. I would make it clear that it is an optional trip and will not be held against her. She can decide if it's worth it. Also, don't post the location of your trip, that will draw out more ire. God Forbid you have the money to take your family and your nanny to the Cote d'Azur for a couple of weeks.

--BTDT

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, never post nanny questions in here. You just get a lot of bitter shrews who can't afford to take a nanny on vacation with them anyway. Compounded with weird assumptions like the nanny not having anyone to watch her kids, etc.

No, don't take the teen with you. Your nanny can either accept the additional work or not. I would make it clear that it is an optional trip and will not be held against her. She can decide if it's worth it. Also, don't post the location of your trip, that will draw out more ire. God Forbid you have the money to take your family and your nanny to the Cote d'Azur for a couple of weeks.

--BTDT

I don’t think the majority of posters are bitter or can’t afford childcare. I just think a lot of us who both work very hard hard fail to see why so many people feel the need to being the nanny on their family vacation instead of enjoying time with their nuclear family. Or what the big deal is if the nanny wants to bring their own self sufficient teen along who could entertain themselves while the nanny works and spend time with the nanny in her off hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. As additional context, the nanny and her husband live together with their kids. The kids who still live at home are high school aged or older. My impression is the DD simply would like to join her mom on this trip. Nanny contract does not require vacation work, so this is an additional request. This would have no impact on vacation to which she is otherwise entitled. We take more than one vacation per year, and she'll have time off the next time we vacation without her, in addition to other time off to which she's entitled.

Side note, I am chuckling at the suggestion that people who have means to live comfortably are not entitled to try to save money where they can.

Side note - I am chuckling at your implied suggestion that the nanny's kids don't have the right to want to spend time with their mom. Nanny should turn you down.

I don't think you read well. She has the right to want to spend time with her mother, but she does not have the right to go to work with her mother. Do yours?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, never post nanny questions in here. You just get a lot of bitter shrews who can't afford to take a nanny on vacation with them anyway. Compounded with weird assumptions like the nanny not having anyone to watch her kids, etc.

No, don't take the teen with you. Your nanny can either accept the additional work or not. I would make it clear that it is an optional trip and will not be held against her. She can decide if it's worth it. Also, don't post the location of your trip, that will draw out more ire. God Forbid you have the money to take your family and your nanny to the Cote d'Azur for a couple of weeks.

--BTDT

I don’t think the majority of posters are bitter or can’t afford childcare. I just think a lot of us who both work very hard hard fail to see why so many people feel the need to being the nanny on their family vacation instead of enjoying time with their nuclear family. Or what the big deal is if the nanny wants to bring their own self sufficient teen along who could entertain themselves while the nanny works and spend time with the nanny in her off hours.

It doesn't really matter if you see the need. It's not your family. You really can't see why someone doesn't want to bring a teen they likely don't know on their family vacation? Yet someone you can't understand why they want to bring a nanny?

Then you're just dense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, never post nanny questions in here. You just get a lot of bitter shrews who can't afford to take a nanny on vacation with them anyway. Compounded with weird assumptions like the nanny not having anyone to watch her kids, etc.

No, don't take the teen with you. Your nanny can either accept the additional work or not. I would make it clear that it is an optional trip and will not be held against her. She can decide if it's worth it. Also, don't post the location of your trip, that will draw out more ire. God Forbid you have the money to take your family and your nanny to the Cote d'Azur for a couple of weeks.

--BTDT

I don’t think the majority of posters are bitter or can’t afford childcare. I just think a lot of us who both work very hard hard fail to see why so many people feel the need to being the nanny on their family vacation instead of enjoying time with their nuclear family. Or what the big deal is if the nanny wants to bring their own self sufficient teen along who could entertain themselves while the nanny works and spend time with the nanny in her off hours.

The majority of posters can't afford a full time nanny that also travels with them, no.

[Anonymous]

Depends upon factors not yet shared by OP.

Has OP met the daughter ?

Type of location of the upcoming vacation. Are there suitable activities for a teen and will the teen need supervision.

Would OP trust the ten to babysit her children ?

How old are OP's children ?

What if one of OP's kids wants to swim while the others do not; would the teen be a reliable individual to supervise one of OP's kids at te swimming pool or ocean/lake ?

[Anonymous]

I'd just say no to the teen and if the nanny can't come without her for whatever reason, we'd hire a different nanny just for the trip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, never post nanny questions in here. You just get a lot of bitter shrews who can't afford to take a nanny on vacation with them anyway. Compounded with weird assumptions like the nanny not having anyone to watch her kids, etc.

No, don't take the teen with you. Your nanny can either accept the additional work or not. I would make it clear that it is an optional trip and will not be held against her. She can decide if it's worth it. Also, don't post the location of your trip, that will draw out more ire. God Forbid you have the money to take your family and your nanny to the Cote d'Azur for a couple of weeks.

--BTDT

Bitter? Nope. Curious about the information that the OP neglected to provide in the original post though. No one really cares where the OP is going on vacation. It does make a difference to know that the teen is an older teen who would not be left alone at home.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like the nanny doesn't want to do it unless she has the perk of being able to bring her daughter with her. Don't blame her. Not in her contract, she doesn't need to do it. You are free to find someone else.

[Anonymous]

I think the folks trying to compare this to their 9-5 white collar jobs are missing the point.

Nannies largely do not get to set their own vacation schedules, and do not have unlimited time off.

OP's nanny is being asked to give up vacation time to make OP's life easier. There's no indication in OP's post that this time will be recouped later. It makes total sense to me as the parent of a teen that the nanny might not want to give up one of her last vacations with her teen, AND that she's afraid to say no to her employer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nannies usually do not bring their children on their bosses' vacation, even teens who are self-sufficient and do not get in the way.

But if you are kind-hearted and the teen is well-behaved, then it could work out. It would just be very unusual.

If the teen is self-sufficient enough to not be an issue on this trip then why are they not self-sufficient enough to remain at home? Just saying that there may be more to this teen than OP knows and that can be part of the equation.

Come on - there is a huge age/maturity difference between "is fine to lay on the beach by herself during the day" and "leave her alone for a week."