My sons best friend smells atrocious

[Anonymous]

I think I’d try to make it about both of them. “Oh boy, teenage boys are so stinky! Did you have PE last period?? Boys please go put some deodorant on and change your shirt and hoodies” and then have some the friend can borrow. If you don’t single him out it feels less personal.

My daughter had a friend like this. I used to make them both take showers. It was puberty stink and got way better after about a year but the girl would wear the same hoodies every day and I truly think that she wore the same one for days and that was the majority of her smell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Doesn't he want a girlfriend??

So many kids these days are afraid to date. Living life on phones + the pandemic made them totally insecure about socializing in real life. I know so many smart, cute, together kids who are just ... not dating.

[Anonymous]

Is there a chance he’d shower/do laundry at your house?

[Anonymous]

You should help him op.
When I was younger my parents didn't give me deodorant. I didn't know about it and despite showering daily I would get musty pits.

One weekend I was at a friend's house and the mom came to the room and said this room stinks. Everyone is showering today. It was me who stunk but everyone showered. My friend handed me deodorant and new clothes while her mom washed everyone's stuff. From that point on I k ew what deodorant was for and used it after showering and never had a problem again.

It was the right thing to do and I appreciate that family.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t say anything. You’ve said kids already mention it to him. He has parents that can surely smell him. You aren’t going to solve his hygiene issues- as well meaning as you might be trying to be by saying something. He likely doesn’t care/is too lazy to shower and change clothes daily. If your son can put up with it, so can you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is something the counselor or mental health professional at school could look into. Is that an option at your school?

This

[Anonymous]

My kids shower every day, use deodorant, and by the middle or end of the day, they stink. They are not overweight. They just have an odor about them.

I've never told anyone this, but one of my kids has a scent that really bugs me, and even after I wash his clothes with all the things you would need to make them come out with nothing but chemical fabric smell, I can still smell him. I put air purifiers in his room and spray Fabreeze, and I still have to hold my breath in his room. It's just his natural scent, but it is just awful to me. No one else in the house seems to notice it. But if anyone else is picking up this smell, I bet they would think he never showers or washes his clothes, when he's actually pretty fastidious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is something the counselor or mental health professional at school could look into. Is that an option at your school?

This

High (or middle) school counselors have more pressing issues than some kid’s BO. They could probably spend all 40 hrs of their work week investigating the kids that stink. Lots of teens small bad for various reasons. OP already said his house is stable, family isn’t poor, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids shower every day, use deodorant, and by the middle or end of the day, they stink. They are not overweight. They just have an odor about them.

I've never told anyone this, but one of my kids has a scent that really bugs me, and even after I wash his clothes with all the things you would need to make them come out with nothing but chemical fabric smell, I can still smell him. I put air purifiers in his room and spray Fabreeze, and I still have to hold my breath in his room. It's just his natural scent, but it is just awful to me. No one else in the house seems to notice it. But if anyone else is picking up this smell, I bet they would think he never showers or washes his clothes, when he's actually pretty fastidious.

What kind of soap are you using? Are they scrubbing everything well, including his scalp? Drying his body really well? Drinking enough water? Taking a probiotic? Chlorophyll capsules?GI issues can also affect body odor. Get some shower to shower powder or baby powder for him to use after his shower. I wonder if it's his sweat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He might have ADHD. For some reason some ADHD kids don't like to shower.

I have a 15 year old who has ADHD and doesn't like to shower but it's not optional in my house. I still parent him at 15 and tell him to get his behind in the shower.

[Anonymous]

I had to chat with a friend of my daughter's. We were on a road trip and the car stunk. I gave the kid my travel deodorant and said that sorry, the natural stuff was not working. Kid has smelled good ever since.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son's friend (10) is very stinky but it's just his feet, not BO. Somehow that seems less personal so I have no problem saying "Wow, your feet are pretty stinky. Why don't you put your socks outside and spray your feet with this." He doesn't seem to care. I can still smell them long after he leaves.
I am just grateful that my son has a good friend.

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Wut. This is just as insulting you dolt

The kid is at my house every day so he must not be that insulted.

Maybe you should offer to wash his shoes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is something the counselor or mental health professional at school could look into. Is that an option at your school?

I can see but I know it’s been addressed by his parents, stepparents, friends, siblings and peers.

What makes you imagine that your input would have more effect than all of these?

Nothing. Which is why I stated in my OP I can’t do much about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Family life is stable. Lives in a large home with many similar ages siblings and step siblings but he has his own room and access to privacy and shower.

This sounds stable to you?

Yeah, having step-siblings doesn’t make a house unstable.

What is this, 1954?

[Anonymous]

[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:You should help him op.
When I was younger my parents didn't give me deodorant. I didn't know about it and despite showering daily I would get musty pits.

One weekend I was at a friend's house and the mom came to the room and said this room stinks. Everyone is showering today. It was me who stunk but everyone showered. My friend handed me deodorant and new clothes while her mom washed everyone's stuff. From that point on I k ew what deodorant was for and used it after showering and never had a problem again.

It was the right thing to do and I appreciate that family.

I know for a fact he has access to all this in his home.

His stepmom is PTA leader. His siblings are all well groomed. It’s his own issue. He’s much larger than them though and I think therefor self conscience. I also think he’s depressed.