Smug Catholic school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our friends switched their DD and DS from our local public to Catholic school this year and won't stop trashing the public. Our kids still go there and we are happy with it! They have made comments about how there are fewer kids with IEPs and behavioral issues and that the education is better. They have even said we are going to have to supplement for our kids to keep pace with theirs.

I'm glad they're happy but I find these comments totally obnoxious and it makes me want to stop seeing them. I also don't know now you determine that the education is superior less than a month in. I am kind of dumbfounded that they have said this multiple times.

Am I off base to find this obnoxious? I want to address this directly the next time. Like "hey I'm glad you're happy but we have chosen to stay at the school and it's not cool that you keep disparaging it." Or should I just ignore?

Interesting. We moved to the DC area from the West Coast. Kids were in Catholic at the time - elementary school level.

Private Catholic schools out West definitely have their issues with wealthy families with awful children. They get a pass, because these families have paid full tuition for 10 horrible bullies and cretins over the last decade or two. These are such small schools, where one rotten kid in a class of 15 can really impact the experiences of everyone else. And the Catholic schools that need the money - even in the exclusive, expensive areas - let it go. Those little turds don't get expelled bc that family is a cash cow for the school.

It was kind of a relief to come to the DMV and go to the big public school in a good school district where - and this was about 12 years ago - there was this differentiation between smart and talented students and the special needs students and the determined to be mediocre forever students. In a small, expensive Catholic school, they are all in the same class. At MCPS - at the time - students were tracked according to their skills, ability, behavior, and so on. It was refreshing.

Both in great colleges now, so no recent experience with Catholic school smugness. It was an interesting transition though.

[Anonymous]

Just smile, nod, and don’t engage in the conversation. I would bet they are clueless and don’t realize how rude they are being to friends who still have kids in public school.

Just ignore when they say something and the conversation will naturally die.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

I think there is one hellbent poster here trying to reverse the situation to make the other family the “victims.” But OP didn’t say they are just sharing they are happy at their new school. Instead they are trashing the public school, making snide comments about kids receiving services for SNs, and telling OP she’ll need to supplement for her kids to “catch up.” It’s the other family making this into a weird competition, which only insecure people do.

A confident person might mention their kids really love the new school and it’d a great fit. And then be gracious enough not to trash the school attended by the kids they’re talking to.

Like if you buy a house you love you can love your home without crapping on other people’s homes. You can be attractive without insulting other people’s appearances, etc. The only reason to brag and put others down is to try to make yourself feel better about something you are trying to feel good about.

[Anonymous]

Now imagine the smug Catholic school parents are your sister and your BIL...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are glad their kids are finally getting educated too, not just the outliers. If you’re not happy for them cut them off.

Op here. I am happy for them that they are happy and if public wasn't a fit for their kids, good for them for finding something that is.

But I think it borders on chumpish for me to let someone basically say that I am satisfied with my kids getting an inferior education. My one child would likely not be welcome at a parochial school because he has SN.

I don’t know your child’s special needs, but don’t assume they would not be welcome. There are a lot of IEPs at our Catholic school. The archdiocese started a program to include and support children with Downs Syndrome in Catholic schools. But as with a lot of Catholic schools, there are fewer resource teachers or teachers equipped to help as well as public schools can. But it doesn’t follow that they are unwelcome.

dp I think what the pp means by "welcome" is able to meet your child's needs. If they can't support the child and don't help than basically they are 'unwelcome' at the school. Not that the school is actually saying don't come. But if they can't meet basic needs than why should you pay all that money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

It’s very clear from the original post that the friends keep putting down the public school, where OP’s kids still are. Not sure what is hard to understand about that.

OP never said why they left in the first place. That matters.

No it doesn’t. It doesn’t excuse telling people at the old school that their kids’ education is inferior or that they will need to supplement their kids’ education to keep up with the friends’ kids. Just re-read the first paragraph.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

It’s very clear from the original post that the friends keep putting down the public school, where OP’s kids still are. Not sure what is hard to understand about that.

OP never said why they left in the first place. That matters.

No it doesn’t. It doesn’t excuse telling people at the old school that their kids’ education is inferior or that they will need to supplement their kids’ education to keep up with the friends’ kids. Just re-read the first paragraph.

Many people supplement. It’s a given in a lot of public schools. This isn’t breaking news. Still, they left for a reason and op is omitting that for some reason. The school failed her friends in some way and they took the drastic measure to change schools. If it was bullying and i had to pull my kids out you bet your life i would be trashing the school that did nothing. Even if my friend got offended.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

I think there is one hellbent poster here trying to reverse the situation to make the other family the “victims.” But OP didn’t say they are just sharing they are happy at their new school. Instead they are trashing the public school, making snide comments about kids receiving services for SNs, and telling OP she’ll need to supplement for her kids to “catch up.” It’s the other family making this into a weird competition, which only insecure people do.

A confident person might mention their kids really love the new school and it’d a great fit. And then be gracious enough not to trash the school attended by the kids they’re talking to.

Like if you buy a house you love you can love your home without crapping on other people’s homes. You can be attractive without insulting other people’s appearances, etc. The only reason to brag and put others down is to try to make yourself feel better about something you are trying to feel good about.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

It’s very clear from the original post that the friends keep putting down the public school, where OP’s kids still are. Not sure what is hard to understand about that.

OP never said why they left in the first place. That matters.

No it doesn’t. It doesn’t excuse telling people at the old school that their kids’ education is inferior or that they will need to supplement their kids’ education to keep up with the friends’ kids. Just re-read the first paragraph.

Many people supplement. It’s a given in a lot of public schools. This isn’t breaking news. Still, they left for a reason and op is omitting that for some reason. The school failed her friends in some way and they took the drastic measure to change schools. If it was bullying and i had to pull my kids out you bet your life i would be trashing the school that did nothing. Even if my friend got offended.

It’s not about supplementing, it’s about telling your friends they will need to do it to keep up with your kids.

It’s not about trashing the school because your kids got bullied, it’s about telling your friend that their kids’ education is subpar compared to your kids’ education.

This isn’t difficult but I get the sense that you think “being contrarian” is your key personality trait.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

It’s very clear from the original post that the friends keep putting down the public school, where OP’s kids still are. Not sure what is hard to understand about that.

OP never said why they left in the first place. That matters.

No it doesn’t. It doesn’t excuse telling people at the old school that their kids’ education is inferior or that they will need to supplement their kids’ education to keep up with the friends’ kids. Just re-read the first paragraph.

Many people supplement. It’s a given in a lot of public schools. This isn’t breaking news. Still, they left for a reason and op is omitting that for some reason. The school failed her friends in some way and they took the drastic measure to change schools. If it was bullying and i had to pull my kids out you bet your life i would be trashing the school that did nothing. Even if my friend got offended.

It’s not about supplementing, it’s about telling your friends they will need to do it to keep up with your kids.

It’s not about trashing the school because your kids got bullied, it’s about telling your friend that their kids’ education is subpar compared to your kids’ education.

This isn’t difficult but I get the sense that you think “being contrarian” is your key personality trait.

Interesting that OP won’t come back so you’re trying to fill in the gaps in her story.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

It’s very clear from the original post that the friends keep putting down the public school, where OP’s kids still are. Not sure what is hard to understand about that.

OP never said why they left in the first place. That matters.

No it doesn’t. It doesn’t excuse telling people at the old school that their kids’ education is inferior or that they will need to supplement their kids’ education to keep up with the friends’ kids. Just re-read the first paragraph.

Many people supplement. It’s a given in a lot of public schools. This isn’t breaking news. Still, they left for a reason and op is omitting that for some reason. The school failed her friends in some way and they took the drastic measure to change schools. If it was bullying and i had to pull my kids out you bet your life i would be trashing the school that did nothing. Even if my friend got offended.

It’s not about supplementing, it’s about telling your friends they will need to do it to keep up with your kids.

It’s not about trashing the school because your kids got bullied, it’s about telling your friend that their kids’ education is subpar compared to your kids’ education.

This isn’t difficult but I get the sense that you think “being contrarian” is your key personality trait.

Interesting that OP won’t come back so you’re trying to fill in the gaps in her story.

Literally taking things they said from their first paragraph. It’s called “reading.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They're probably in a honeymoon period. I would respond with a comment like the one you suggested. They're being tactless, but over time, you'll probably both have plenty of ups and downs.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

It’s very clear from the original post that the friends keep putting down the public school, where OP’s kids still are. Not sure what is hard to understand about that.

OP never said why they left in the first place. That matters.

No it doesn’t. It doesn’t excuse telling people at the old school that their kids’ education is inferior or that they will need to supplement their kids’ education to keep up with the friends’ kids. Just re-read the first paragraph.

Many people supplement. It’s a given in a lot of public schools. This isn’t breaking news. Still, they left for a reason and op is omitting that for some reason. The school failed her friends in some way and they took the drastic measure to change schools. If it was bullying and i had to pull my kids out you bet your life i would be trashing the school that did nothing. Even if my friend got offended.

It’s not about supplementing, it’s about telling your friends they will need to do it to keep up with your kids.

It’s not about trashing the school because your kids got bullied, it’s about telling your friend that their kids’ education is subpar compared to your kids’ education.

This isn’t difficult but I get the sense that you think “being contrarian” is your key personality trait.

Interesting that OP won’t come back so you’re trying to fill in the gaps in her story.

Literally taking things they said from their first paragraph. It’s called “reading.”

I asked why they left. You don’t know. So thanks for nothing. Is Op paying you to represent her?

[Anonymous]

The why they said what they said isn't important. It's not even important if what they say is true or not. Rude shouldn't happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People who say stuff like this are really still trying to convince themselves that the switch was the right move. They're feeling insecure even though it feels like they're being smug.

Keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.

Found the smug poster.

So, only some people are allowed to be ok with their school? Did OP even know her friends were unhappy and the school didn’t meet their needs? If she did she might be able to muster a little happiness for them. But, instead it’s all about her kids. If her kids needs are met, what’s the problem?

It’s very clear from the original post that the friends keep putting down the public school, where OP’s kids still are. Not sure what is hard to understand about that.

OP never said why they left in the first place. That matters.

No it doesn’t. It doesn’t excuse telling people at the old school that their kids’ education is inferior or that they will need to supplement their kids’ education to keep up with the friends’ kids. Just re-read the first paragraph.

Many people supplement. It’s a given in a lot of public schools. This isn’t breaking news. Still, they left for a reason and op is omitting that for some reason. The school failed her friends in some way and they took the drastic measure to change schools. If it was bullying and i had to pull my kids out you bet your life i would be trashing the school that did nothing. Even if my friend got offended.

It’s not about supplementing, it’s about telling your friends they will need to do it to keep up with your kids.

It’s not about trashing the school because your kids got bullied, it’s about telling your friend that their kids’ education is subpar compared to your kids’ education.

This isn’t difficult but I get the sense that you think “being contrarian” is your key personality trait.

Interesting that OP won’t come back so you’re trying to fill in the gaps in her story.

Literally taking things they said from their first paragraph. It’s called “reading.”

I asked why they left. You don’t know. So thanks for nothing. Is Op paying you to represent her?

Nope, I’m just capable of reading (and I’m not a shitty person so I can understand why what her friends said is rude and uncalled for).