Bumkini

[Anonymous]

I think one of the things, as a parent, that concerns me most about the trend, is not that a 15yo might go over to her friends' house and wear a too-skimpy bikini, or even go to a friendly community pool, etc.

It's that there's a good chance that pictures will end up online—either because kids today seem to have mind-boggingly little awareness of what they post, or because there are genuinely creepy people who take advantage of the lack of awareness.

Do I really care if her friends or a few people at the pool see her? No. I do care if her friend posts a cheeky photo on HER instagram which isn't private and every perv in the world can see it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm really concerned by op commenting that she told her daughter she has deep rooted issues for wanting to wear these bottoms.

Exactly. She is just trying to pass along her deep rooted issues to her poor kids. It’s disgusting. She needs therapy

Op here. I tried to relate a real issue and got flamed by NOw psychos. Thanks to the people who answered kindly. The rest of you need more therapy than you are already getting. Hubby and I are laughing our covered butt's off at ya

If you are actually the OP, you need to leave your poor daughter alone and get yourself and your “hubby” to therapy. Hopefully you are not OP or not for real.

Therapy is for lovers. Sit there and listen to someone you don't know give you advice about you! Lol. If I was a therapist, I would keep telling people they are screwed up. What's my incentive not to? So I lose business?
I had a concern about my kid and brought it up. This place is just toxic though. It's a few great and honest people amongst a plethora of trolls and lovers who have made nothing of themselves and want to bring others down.
Sad, because the idea of the forum is so good. It is people who screw it up.
If you think me being concerned of how much skin my 15 year old is showing is somehow playing into a misogynistic mindset you are nuts. I live in the real world and have concerns about it. Once again, thanks to the honest and kind replies and the rest of you can take a long walk off a short pier.
I had no idea this would become so acrimonious

If you listen to the sincere posters here and read your original post, you will hopefully begin to understand that you are playing into and exhibiting a misogynistic mindset. But if you think therapy is only for lovers (and losers?), I don’t hold out a lot of hope. It’s for all the people who want to do better in life.

Yes it was losers. Autocorrect got me. You are damaged seriously. I am not playing into a misogynistic mindset at all; I am trying to keep my child safe and to teach her that the world isn't as safe as it seems. It shouldn't be that way, but it is. It us ludicrous to turn a blind eye to reality no matter how disconcerting it is. My little 15 yo DD is a young girl who doesn't know that - like it or not- when you wear certain things you are liable to get attention you don't want. It isn't fair, but it is what it is. I surmise that many of you here have no kids, and you are the misogyny police. I am not interested in how you feel the world should be. I am interested in how it is and how to help my child navigate it.
In fairness some of the more sane posters here have really helped me to think about whether this is a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

[Anonymous]

Eh. I'd generally ignore it. That look seems to be a thing for 15/16, but not happening at 17/18. It's a temporary stage. Wouldn't go to war over it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

This probably a different discussion for a larger thread, but I do think it's probably true that women don't look at men the same way men look at women, ie, to look "good" as a woman, always has and always will involve visually displaying more of your body. Now obviously, men are not the only deciders of what women "looking good" means, but I don't think you have to go out on a limb to say it plays a large part. As a man, I don't dress for other men, and I don't wear things that display my genitalia or my ass because, again, not going out on a limb, that's not what most women want to see.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eh. I'd generally ignore it. That look seems to be a thing for 15/16, but not happening at 17/18. It's a temporary stage. Wouldn't go to war over it

Because at 17 they're onto string thongs? I see women 30-45 in thongs. It's not a temporary stage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

+1

I mean… think about it. Who are the ultimate winners in the sex positive women, anything goes ladies! movement (ahem anal and choking and all sorts of other ridiculous crap that no one will ever convince me the average woman would ever choose to do if it weren’t for societal pressure), and the birth control revolution, and the “sex work is WORK!” nonsense? Answer: MEN.

Gullible women are taking their BS hook, line, and sinker. There is a huge expanse between virginal prude and whatever is happening these days. But no, if one doesn’t agree with going to one extreme that must mean one is the other extreme.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

+1

I mean… think about it. Who are the ultimate winners in the sex positive women, anything goes ladies! movement (ahem anal and choking and all sorts of other ridiculous crap that no one will ever convince me the average woman would ever choose to do if it weren’t for societal pressure), and the birth control revolution, and the “sex work is WORK!” nonsense? Answer: MEN.

Gullible women are taking their BS hook, line, and sinker. There is a huge expanse between virginal prude and whatever is happening these days. But no, if one doesn’t agree with going to one extreme that must mean one is the other extreme.

If woman want to wear ridiculously small things, that's fine and I can see how that's freeing and whatever... but you should not be naive about what men are thinking. And it's nothing you would ever want to do anything to encourage anyone ever to think about your daughter. So, celebrate the freedom that you CAN wear anything, but please, please think twice before you let your daughters do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

+1

I mean… think about it. Who are the ultimate winners in the sex positive women, anything goes ladies! movement (ahem anal and choking and all sorts of other ridiculous crap that no one will ever convince me the average woman would ever choose to do if it weren’t for societal pressure), and the birth control revolution, and the “sex work is WORK!” nonsense? Answer: MEN.

Gullible women are taking their BS hook, line, and sinker. There is a huge expanse between virginal prude and whatever is happening these days. But no, if one doesn’t agree with going to one extreme that must mean one is the other extreme.

If woman want to wear ridiculously small things, that's fine and I can see how that's freeing and whatever... but you should not be naive about what men are thinking. And it's nothing you would ever want to do anything to encourage anyone ever to think about your daughter. So, celebrate the freedom that you CAN wear anything, but please, please think twice before you let your daughters do it.

Op here. Thank you. DD is our first child and we are navigating this. She is a cute kid with a muscular body gained through her activities. She likes boys and has been on dates (supervised ) but she still has a baby tooth and still likes to hug her teddy as she falls asleep.
I was hoping that coming here would help and thankfully it has. We were looking for experienced folks to give us insight. I didn't expect to get into a gender battle. I don't even think it is necessary to do so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh. I'd generally ignore it. That look seems to be a thing for 15/16, but not happening at 17/18. It's a temporary stage. Wouldn't go to war over it

Because at 17 they're onto string thongs? I see women 30-45 in thongs. It's not a temporary stage.

And in Europe they are nude. And in the Middle East you can only see eyes. So like who really cares what people wear. I sure don’t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

+1

I mean… think about it. Who are the ultimate winners in the sex positive women, anything goes ladies! movement (ahem anal and choking and all sorts of other ridiculous crap that no one will ever convince me the average woman would ever choose to do if it weren’t for societal pressure), and the birth control revolution, and the “sex work is WORK!” nonsense? Answer: MEN.

Gullible women are taking their BS hook, line, and sinker. There is a huge expanse between virginal prude and whatever is happening these days. But no, if one doesn’t agree with going to one extreme that must mean one is the other extreme.

If woman want to wear ridiculously small things, that's fine and I can see how that's freeing and whatever... but you should not be naive about what men are thinking. And it's nothing you would ever want to do anything to encourage anyone ever to think about your daughter. So, celebrate the freedom that you CAN wear anything, but please, please think twice before you let your daughters do it.

Op here. Thank you. DD is our first child and we are navigating this. She is a cute kid with a muscular body gained through her activities. She likes boys and has been on dates (supervised ) but she still has a baby tooth and still likes to hug her teddy as she falls asleep.
I was hoping that coming here would help and thankfully it has. We were looking for experienced folks to give us insight. I didn't expect to get into a gender battle. I don't even think it is necessary to do so.

Well, if you don't mind older men leering at her and the boys at school trading photos of her... I mean, it sounds like she's too nice to be treated that way and you can pretty simply avoid all that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

Oh, I mean 1000%, yeah. I think they’re wearing the thongs to compete with each other for a very male-centric thing I want my daughter to want no part in. But I’m not going to pile on by a) making her feel ashamed of wanting to fit in or be attractive b) expecting her to solve this puzzle and materialize the end-goal of feminism in bathing suit form c) telling her she’s responsible for pervs.

We’re all balancing all this stuff as parents and for me, the bathing suit is one I would just say you can pick your swimsuit and be safe and no diving in the shallow end, ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh. I'd generally ignore it. That look seems to be a thing for 15/16, but not happening at 17/18. It's a temporary stage. Wouldn't go to war over it

Because at 17 they're onto string thongs? I see women 30-45 in thongs. It's not a temporary stage.

And in Europe they are nude. And in the Middle East you can only see eyes. So like who really cares what people wear. I sure don’t

I'm not sure I follow... you want women to dress like they do in the middle east?

Also, full public nudity is not common in Europe, no matter what your favorite videos on the internet say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

+1

I mean… think about it. Who are the ultimate winners in the sex positive women, anything goes ladies! movement (ahem anal and choking and all sorts of other ridiculous crap that no one will ever convince me the average woman would ever choose to do if it weren’t for societal pressure), and the birth control revolution, and the “sex work is WORK!” nonsense? Answer: MEN.

Gullible women are taking their BS hook, line, and sinker. There is a huge expanse between virginal prude and whatever is happening these days. But no, if one doesn’t agree with going to one extreme that must mean one is the other extreme.

If woman want to wear ridiculously small things, that's fine and I can see how that's freeing and whatever... but you should not be naive about what men are thinking. And it's nothing you would ever want to do anything to encourage anyone ever to think about your daughter. So, celebrate the freedom that you CAN wear anything, but please, please think twice before you let your daughters do it.

Op here. Thank you. DD is our first child and we are navigating this. She is a cute kid with a muscular body gained through her activities. She likes boys and has been on dates (supervised ) but she still has a baby tooth and still likes to hug her teddy as she falls asleep.
I was hoping that coming here would help and thankfully it has. We were looking for experienced folks to give us insight. I didn't expect to get into a gender battle. I don't even think it is necessary to do so.

She’s 15 and you are treating her like a baby and behaving poorly. Bringing up sex offenders is unreal. Raising her to feel like her clothes demean her and could get her assaulted?!? Yuck

Mom of 14, 18, and 22yr old girls

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What I find troubling about it is body positivity and fashion and trends always seem to err on the side of girls and women being half naked while men are well covered.


Hmmmm…pretty convenient.

If this is feminism and body positivity and sticking it to the man, well it kind of sucks.

As for OP, I’d just let her wear it but let her know she might get some comments and looks she doesn’t like and how to handle them.

And body positivity doesn't mean you HAVE to display your body, it means you shouldn't feel ashamed of your body. Being proud of who you are and what you look like has nothing to do with whether or not you were skimpy clothes.

I agree, but teens and tweens are generally not capable of making independent decisions. All my 13-year old wants to wear is whatever she things everyone else will wear. If that's a baggy shirt, fine. If that's a crop top, fine. I think we're all blinking at reality a little bit when we say that, oh, these girls have agency and are making choices and we should support that. And I agree with PP that it's, to say the least, odd, that boys choices almost uniformly result in them wearing comfortable modest clothes, whereas girls' "choices" result in them wearing stuff that's creeping up their ass into their buttcrack. Maybe they are all choosing that as an empowered body-positive step. Or maybe some creepy old men in charge of the fashion industry have decided that's what to sell them, and they all follow along because they are terrified of being different at that age.

I have another daughter who is borderline autistic and doesn't care much what other people think, and she never chooses the thing that is creeping up her butt.

I'm not OP, and I'm not fighting this battle with my teen, but I am observing that fashion is still selling women and girls an image of themselves that is very tied to the male gaze. I just don't believe that this is the end-goal for feminism.

Oh, I mean 1000%, yeah. I think they’re wearing the thongs to compete with each other for a very male-centric thing I want my daughter to want no part in. But I’m not going to pile on by a) making her feel ashamed of wanting to fit in or be attractive b) expecting her to solve this puzzle and materialize the end-goal of feminism in bathing suit form c) telling her she’s responsible for pervs.

We’re all balancing all this stuff as parents and for me, the bathing suit is one I would just say you can pick your swimsuit and be safe and no diving in the shallow end, ever.

You can teach her that she's not responsible for pervs... but don't let her be naive that there are tons of pervs and the boys who she's competing for the attention of will not like her any better for the thong. They will laugh at her behind her back and they will try to have sex with her, but they're not going to like her. They might even pay MORE attention to her if she clearly has an attractive body and she DOESN'T wear a revealing suit.