Vent about marrying someone from a very underdeveloped country

[Anonymous]

It's Bangladesh people. This is OP, her update from this year is on page 6.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/90/751488.page

[Anonymous]

What country?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's Bangladesh people. This is OP, her update from this year is on page 6.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/90/751488.page

Is it? It's still pretty decently warm in Faridpur, Bangladesh right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do they not have any punctuation…other than ellipsis…

The US consistently refuses to export our punctuation culture to other countries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's Bangladesh people. This is OP, her update from this year is on page 6.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/90/751488.page

Is it? It's still pretty decently warm in Faridpur, Bangladesh right now.

This is a quote from that thread: "my husband is suggesting we only take 2 luggage's for 4 people. He drives me nuts sometimes. If I need to bring food for one month how can I fit that in half of a suitcase?"

You're telling me these are different people? They aren't. Hold please while I find the other thread she started about packing food.

[Anonymous]

DH and I are from different countries. I made danged sure to go and meet his parents and other family and see where they lived. And he is the American one, while I am from former Yugoslavia. Even after, I was not sure tbh. Nobody even offered me a glass of water when I arrived to their house. I thought they had no hosting skills at all.

In the end, we live overseas and travel to different countries for work. Just his dad is way too much for me to be around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oookay.

Consider talking to your husband when you come back. Let him know that you wish you were better prepared.

Having to bathe out of the bucket is not the end of the world. Not eating chicken nuggets is not the end of the world. Being constantly cold would be, so keep your list reasonable, and see how you can work around it, the next time you go. Maybe he goes first and you join him later, to keep your portion of the trip shorter. Tell him you want to see the country, not just sit at home. This will automatically get you to places where you will have access to different food, shopping, etc.

And unless you have very young kids, work on expanding their palate. There are things you can do here to make your next trip easier.

OP here. Have you done this for a MONTH? I think not. Our kids are very young, and we were advised that boxed food would be better. We all got super sick during the last trip. Please let me know what we can do to make our trip easier... I planned how to make this trip easier for months.. there is only so much you can do. His family doesn't live close to a big city.. there isn't a lot of shopping and restaurants around... going out to restaurants and using a supermarket is a newer concept here...

I was born and raised in India. Although I have lived here for the vast majority of my life (35+ years), when I go back, I still bathe with a bucket and a mug. NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. My DD, especially when she was young, actually enjoyed playing in water that way. You can 100% get clean this way.

If you share where in the world you are, I bet people will have suggestions for what you can do to make this more pleasant. In general though, you may have to cook food. There are no parts of the world where you are going to get sick from eating hot foods, especially prepared at home.

I also assume this was India. I was born in th US and would go back for summer vacations and yes bucket showers for 3 months. Things were even much less developed 30 yrs ago.

A lot of this sounds like a marriage/DH problem around not spending $, length of the trip, etc.

OP sounds incredibly dramatic re food etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's Bangladesh people. This is OP, her update from this year is on page 6.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/90/751488.page

Is it? It's still pretty decently warm in Faridpur, Bangladesh right now.

This is a quote from that thread: "my husband is suggesting we only take 2 luggage's for 4 people. He drives me nuts sometimes. If I need to bring food for one month how can I fit that in half of a suitcase?"

You're telling me these are different people? They aren't. Hold please while I find the other thread she started about packing food.

It's the same person. SO much drama! The way she was writing, I thought she was in some remote village somewhere, not Faridpur, where I hear they have amazing food!

[Anonymous]

There is zero chance I’d be going there more than once unless it’s for a funeral.

[Anonymous]

It sounds overwhelming if this isn't your style of travel for a full month. There are very few places I would want to be for a full month.

Even without an American style supermarket, is there somewhere you can go for familiar foods - bread, produce, meat? Go w DH or a family member to learn how to navigate that market of that is a problem. Learn enough of the language to ask "how much" and say thank you. Since it's not the first trip and it won't be last, your best bet would be to learn to navigate the area a bit on your own.

The shower thing would be difficult since that's not what you're used to. Is there a hotel somewhere that you can go once or twice for some comfort and a break?

[Anonymous]

At least the Internet works well

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:These replies are wild. I don't thinking you are being dramatic at all, OP. I can't relate but I would have a really challenging time in these circumstances. I spent a few months doing some trekking in western China and Nepal and the toilets were an outdoor trough or hole, minimal showers, that sort of thing. I learned enough of the languages to order my own food, ask directions, make basic conversation and embraced the local cuisine. That's my best recommendation to you - make the most of it and encourage your kids to do the same. The best food you will eat anywhere in the world is whatever is fresh and local. It is a gift to your kids for them to learn how to embrace new cultures.

The gift to the kids will be diarrhea, for sure, and potentially more serious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's Bangladesh people. This is OP, her update from this year is on page 6.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/90/751488.page

Is it? It's still pretty decently warm in Faridpur, Bangladesh right now.

This is a quote from that thread: "my husband is suggesting we only take 2 luggage's for 4 people. He drives me nuts sometimes. If I need to bring food for one month how can I fit that in half of a suitcase?"

You're telling me these are different people? They aren't. Hold please while I find the other thread she started about packing food.

Here's the other thread:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1174556.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oookay.

Consider talking to your husband when you come back. Let him know that you wish you were better prepared.

Having to bathe out of the bucket is not the end of the world. Not eating chicken nuggets is not the end of the world. Being constantly cold would be, so keep your list reasonable, and see how you can work around it, the next time you go. Maybe he goes first and you join him later, to keep your portion of the trip shorter. Tell him you want to see the country, not just sit at home. This will automatically get you to places where you will have access to different food, shopping, etc.

And unless you have very young kids, work on expanding their palate. There are things you can do here to make your next trip easier.

OP here. Have you done this for a MONTH? I think not. Our kids are very young, and we were advised that boxed food would be better. We all got super sick during the last trip. Please let me know what we can do to make our trip easier... I planned how to make this trip easier for months.. there is only so much you can do. His family doesn't live close to a big city.. there isn't a lot of shopping and restaurants around... going out to restaurants and using a supermarket is a newer concept here...

I was born and raised in India. Although I have lived here for the vast majority of my life (35+ years), when I go back, I still bathe with a bucket and a mug. NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. My DD, especially when she was young, actually enjoyed playing in water that way. You can 100% get clean this way.

If you share where in the world you are, I bet people will have suggestions for what you can do to make this more pleasant. In general though, you may have to cook food. There are no parts of the world where you are going to get sick from eating hot foods, especially prepared at home.

Yeah, this isn't relevant. You were born there. You're essentially like her DH. For most people 99 percent it would be a pretty big deal to do that for a month.

Not the PP but I was born and raised in the US. When we used to visit extended family in S Asia growing up we had to bathe using a bucket. Our visits were 1-2 months long. Yes it’s a pain but definitely not the end of the world. If you’re making this into a big deal then it’ll be a big deal for your kids. Otherwise they won’t care (like us).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nobody should be eating chicken nuggets. Why people even introduce those to kids is beyond me.

If I were you OP, I'd figure out a way to get out--LEARN how to find your way back to his family's house. Go for a walk, enjoy the new environment, smell the smells, eat the eats, and have fun. I doubt anyone is forcing you to sit around the house all day, it's a choice you're making out of fear. Make a different choice.

Yeah! No one should debase themselves to eat chicken nuggets. I mean are they even organic? You need to totally hunt down your own live chicken and process it for the fam. Learn how to live! Enjoy the brackish water or whatever! Why are you complaining?