Serious things you accept to stay marriage

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My spouse doesn't stimulate me intellectually. Which is fine - they are a wonderful person and I get to exercise my brain plenty at work.

Did you not talk to them before signing marriage license?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Realities of DH:
- ADD (let me senior dog out to potty, forgot about him, and the dog drowned in the pool)
- on the spectrum
- career fell off a cliff 8 years ago (fired from job, accepted low paying government drone position and has never left)

It’s been a struggle, but we have two kids and I literally have zero family support so I’m not leaving. I make significantly more than him, and also work an extra 30 hours per month as an attorney freelancer (on top of my full time job) so we can have a nice life and have a vacation, throw a good bday party for the kids etc.

What will you do when he lets one of your kids die?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My spouse doesn't stimulate me intellectually. Which is fine - they are a wonderful person and I get to exercise my brain plenty at work.

Did you not talk to them before signing marriage license?

DP. My spouse and I are both equally intelligent, but we have different intellectual interests. I married him fully aware of that. We have other important things in common. I didn’t get married expecting my dh to meet my every need. I have friends and family who I can share different interests with.

For what it’s worth, the guys I dated who I was able to stay up all night with discussing existential questions made for some of the least stable relationships I was in. I ended up prioritizing common background, future goals, similar lifestyles and values.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:ther wife with a no drive husband.

I don’t cope. I’m an emotional mess. My body image is entirely threshed and taking care of myself while a nice release in the moment is depressing. I miss being desired and we are not as connected as we could be. He is aware of this and still does nothing. Head in the sand. I’m wretched around ovulation.

Another…

Another.

Check out Reddits’s HL_women only subreddit if you’re feeling alone. It’s great to see you’re not alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Realities of DH:
- ADD (let me senior dog out to potty, forgot about him, and the dog drowned in the pool)
- on the spectrum
- career fell off a cliff 8 years ago (fired from job, accepted low paying government drone position and has never left)

It’s been a struggle, but we have two kids and I literally have zero family support so I’m not leaving. I make significantly more than him, and also work an extra 30 hours per month as an attorney freelancer (on top of my full time job) so we can have a nice life and have a vacation, throw a good bday party for the kids etc.

What will you do when he lets one of your kids die?

PP. Put my kids in swim lessons when they turned 2. Now, they’re on a year round competitive swim team. They know they can’t swim alone in the pool and they comply with that rule. Oldest is 13, youngest 10. Would never allow DH to take the kids to the ocean without me. Part of the reason I stay..to protect them.

[Anonymous]

Lack of sex. She just has no interest - doesn't think about it or care about it. She presented herself as sex-positive early in our relationship, but later admitted that it was more of an "act" that she was putting on. Somewhat feel like I was conned, but I'm not going to give up half my time with my kid. So, porn it is.

[Anonymous]

Marriage is hard and you won’t always like your spouse.

We do really adore each other though - I think you have to love each other for it to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Marriage is hard and you won’t always like your spouse.

We do really adore each other though - I think you have to love each other for it to work.

PP and want to add I’m sorry to see the sexless posters - your spouses are not being very good to you. I like sex and my husband loves it, would literally have sex multiple times a day if I would be up to it. I end up having a lot more sex than I would otherwise because I know it makes him happy and I know it’s good for us as a married couple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Realities of DH:
- ADD (let me senior dog out to potty, forgot about him, and the dog drowned in the pool)
- on the spectrum
- career fell off a cliff 8 years ago (fired from job, accepted low paying government drone position and has never left)

It’s been a struggle, but we have two kids and I literally have zero family support so I’m not leaving. I make significantly more than him, and also work an extra 30 hours per month as an attorney freelancer (on top of my full time job) so we can have a nice life and have a vacation, throw a good bday party for the kids etc.

What will you do when he lets one of your kids die?

PP. Put my kids in swim lessons when they turned 2. Now, they’re on a year round competitive swim team. They know they can’t swim alone in the pool and they comply with that rule. Oldest is 13, youngest 10. Would never allow DH to take the kids to the ocean without me. Part of the reason I stay..to protect them.

And you think that's the only way they can die from his neglect/ forgetfulness?

[Anonymous]

that i work ten times as hard as him and make way more and he doesn't care that it is basically destroying me mentally and physically. Like - doesn't actually have an opinion on that. And does not pick up extra slack at home either.

[Anonymous]

Massive weight gain from my spouse with. I effort to be healthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Realities of DH:
- ADD (let me senior dog out to potty, forgot about him, and the dog drowned in the pool)
- on the spectrum
- career fell off a cliff 8 years ago (fired from job, accepted low paying government drone position and has never left)

It’s been a struggle, but we have two kids and I literally have zero family support so I’m not leaving. I make significantly more than him, and also work an extra 30 hours per month as an attorney freelancer (on top of my full time job) so we can have a nice life and have a vacation, throw a good bday party for the kids etc.

This is the worst one yet.

I'm sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Realities of DH:
- ADD (let me senior dog out to potty, forgot about him, and the dog drowned in the pool)
- on the spectrum
- career fell off a cliff 8 years ago (fired from job, accepted low paying government drone position and has never left)

It’s been a struggle, but we have two kids and I literally have zero family support so I’m not leaving. I make significantly more than him, and also work an extra 30 hours per month as an attorney freelancer (on top of my full time job) so we can have a nice life and have a vacation, throw a good bday party for the kids etc.

What will you do when he lets one of your kids die?

PP. Put my kids in swim lessons when they turned 2. Now, they’re on a year round competitive swim team. They know they can’t swim alone in the pool and they comply with that rule. Oldest is 13, youngest 10. Would never allow DH to take the kids to the ocean without me. Part of the reason I stay..to protect them.

And you think that's the only way they can die from his neglect/ forgetfulness?

They are 13 and 10. Seems like she's been pretty successful so far.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Realities of DH:
- ADD (let me senior dog out to potty, forgot about him, and the dog drowned in the pool)
- on the spectrum
- career fell off a cliff 8 years ago (fired from job, accepted low paying government drone position and has never left)

It’s been a struggle, but we have two kids and I literally have zero family support so I’m not leaving. I make significantly more than him, and also work an extra 30 hours per month as an attorney freelancer (on top of my full time job) so we can have a nice life and have a vacation, throw a good bday party for the kids etc.

What will you do when he lets one of your kids die?

PP. Put my kids in swim lessons when they turned 2. Now, they’re on a year round competitive swim team. They know they can’t swim alone in the pool and they comply with that rule. Oldest is 13, youngest 10. Would never allow DH to take the kids to the ocean without me. Part of the reason I stay..to protect them.

And you think that's the only way they can die from his neglect/ forgetfulness?

PP. They’re not infants and are pretty self sufficient. My daughter babysits. How is DH’s neglect going to kill them at this point? Most potentially dangerous situations I can control by being lead decision maker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Realities of DH:
- ADD (let me senior dog out to potty, forgot about him, and the dog drowned in the pool)
- on the spectrum
- career fell off a cliff 8 years ago (fired from job, accepted low paying government drone position and has never left)

It’s been a struggle, but we have two kids and I literally have zero family support so I’m not leaving. I make significantly more than him, and also work an extra 30 hours per month as an attorney freelancer (on top of my full time job) so we can have a nice life and have a vacation, throw a good bday party for the kids etc.

What will you do when he lets one of your kids die?

PP. Put my kids in swim lessons when they turned 2. Now, they’re on a year round competitive swim team. They know they can’t swim alone in the pool and they comply with that rule. Oldest is 13, youngest 10. Would never allow DH to take the kids to the ocean without me. Part of the reason I stay..to protect them.

And you think that's the only way they can die from his neglect/ forgetfulness?

They are 13 and 10. Seems like she's been pretty successful so far.

True. It only takes one time though.