I feel like my hosting is rarely reciprocated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you host Americans, it will not be reciprocated. It is because they are classless, mannerless, lazy, dirty, low energy, dysfunctional, selfish, miserly and broke.

Make peace with it. They are uncouth but you should continue to host because you must teach better to your kids, and you don't really want your kids to go to their dirty homes, do you?

Presumably OP is American and she is the one hosting sleepovers. Your statement is clearly false.

[Anonymous]

Those of you saying you don’t have space, house is messy, siblings, dogs, whatever, are making excuses. If you wanted to host a sleepover you could. Or host an evening gathering and have the kids go home. I have an only DD (11) and host single kids now and again but rarely. I do however take kids with us a lot on outings. Just took a friend tothe beach with us for 3 nights, and a different friend to the pool all afternoon yesterday. Own your decisions and be honest, but make some effort to reciprocate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one is taking advantage of you, OP.

She knows. The post is a VBA not a real complaint.

[Anonymous]

My daughter's friends come over, it's not that they don't, but I can't have them over as much as I want. We're in a weird situation where we have several generations living in the house at the same time and limited space. So I definitely notice and appreciate that other families are able to have the girls over more often. I always let the other moms know that I appreciate it. Here, we also have someone whose immunity compromised.

My advice would be to be grateful that you have the opportunity to open your home up to these kids, and try not to judge others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those of you saying you don’t have space, house is messy, siblings, dogs, whatever, are making excuses. If you wanted to host a sleepover you could. Or host an evening gathering and have the kids go home. I have an only DD (11) and host single kids now and again but rarely. I do however take kids with us a lot on outings. Just took a friend tothe beach with us for 3 nights, and a different friend to the pool all afternoon yesterday. Own your decisions and be honest, but make some effort to reciprocate.

Meh. We have other things in life that matter more than trying to manufacture a social life for our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those of you saying you don’t have space, house is messy, siblings, dogs, whatever, are making excuses. If you wanted to host a sleepover you could. Or host an evening gathering and have the kids go home. I have an only DD (11) and host single kids now and again but rarely. I do however take kids with us a lot on outings. Just took a friend tothe beach with us for 3 nights, and a different friend to the pool all afternoon yesterday. Own your decisions and be honest, but make some effort to reciprocate.

Your kid is 11. Step back. It’s on her now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those of you saying you don’t have space, house is messy, siblings, dogs, whatever, are making excuses. If you wanted to host a sleepover you could. Or host an evening gathering and have the kids go home. I have an only DD (11) and host single kids now and again but rarely. I do however take kids with us a lot on outings. Just took a friend tothe beach with us for 3 nights, and a different friend to the pool all afternoon yesterday. Own your decisions and be honest, but make some effort to reciprocate.

I do other things (drive around picking up five kids and taking them all bowling on a rainy afternoon, for example). But I don't host sleepovers. OP's post was specific to hosting sleepovers and having those sleepovers reciprocated.

[Anonymous]

You cook dinner AND breakfast for them? No wonder they are over there the most.

[Anonymous]

You can only control yourself - just do what you're happy with because you want to do it and not expect reciprocation. If you don't want to do it, don't do it. If you do, then do. People with more kids are busier and less feeling like they need to plan something to entertain their kids - it is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Oh my goodness, hopefully you keep a clean home, feed your children and occasionally let them do fun activities regardless of whether their friends are in your home. It is no more work to have a couple of tweens around eating pizza and watching a movie. If anything, it makes less work because your kids are entertained.

If you only cook and clean and entertain your kids when you have guests over, you’re doing it wrong. What you are doing isn’t “hosting,” OP, just so you know.

-Frequently has kids over for play dates and sleepovers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those of you saying you don’t have space, house is messy, siblings, dogs, whatever, are making excuses. If you wanted to host a sleepover you could. Or host an evening gathering and have the kids go home. I have an only DD (11) and host single kids now and again but rarely. I do however take kids with us a lot on outings. Just took a friend tothe beach with us for 3 nights, and a different friend to the pool all afternoon yesterday. Own your decisions and be honest, but make some effort to reciprocate.

I think you should just accept that these people don't want to host sleepovers. They've made it clear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a great thing that your daughter and her friends WANT to hang out at your place. It’s a great way to make sure you know your kid’s friends, can make sure you’re aware of what they are getting up to, etc.

I would rather constantly host sleepovers rather than send my kid to sleep at the home of a random family I might not know that well.

I would rather host too - but no one wants to come to our house. Too small. Count your blessings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, at this age, I would just be happy that they want to be at your house and you can keep an eye on them.

Yes to this. Sounds great to me - your tween/teen DC is home under your supervision, having a good time with friends. That is ideal to me, personally. If you can afford the extra food & the kids are decently well behaved, I say consider yourself lucky.

+2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one is taking advantage of you, OP.

She knows. The post is a VBA not a real complaint.

What's a VBA?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you host Americans, it will not be reciprocated. It is because they are classless, mannerless, lazy, dirty, low energy, dysfunctional, selfish, miserly and broke.

Make peace with it. They are uncouth but you should continue to host because you must teach better to your kids, and you don't really want your kids to go to their dirty homes, do you?

Presumably OP is American and she is the one hosting sleepovers. Your statement is clearly false.

PP is referring to the Americans in their own home.