I feel like my hosting is rarely reciprocated.

[Anonymous]

I love my daughter, I love my daughter's many friends. I enjoy sleepovers and do my best to make sure that they have a good dinner and breakfast and are comfortable.

What I don't love is that my daughter's friend's rarely reciprocate.

She is an only child and most of her friend's have brother's and sister's so is this because the other parents likely have more on their plate or just don't realize or what? It's not a huge problem and I know that my daughter is certainly polite enough, but I'm just getting tired of having kids over and never having her invited out. Is there something I'm missing, or is everyone just too busy these days? Or am I being taken advantage of?

[Anonymous]

We don't have the space for sleepovers. And, my kids don't care nor like to sleep over others homes.

[Anonymous]

We can't host sleepovers because our dog can't handle it. Serious question, would you prefer our kids turn down sleepover invites since we can't reciprocate?

[Anonymous]

Part of it might be your only-child may be "needing" sleepovers, lots of social interactions, etc verses her friends who have built-in playmates/busy schedules bc of siblings (older or younger).

As a family of 6, my 2 older kids request i host on occasion, but bc we're busy with other things and family stuff there there's not the demand that you seem to experience.

Plus, as they get older they like to meet at places so the pressure to host won't be as great.
Dds likes to meet her friends at the movies, for mini golf, bowling, back to school shopping, etc. Not so much sleepovers bc that becomes trite at a certain age .

[Anonymous]

If you don’t want to do it, don’t do it. But don’t keep hosting expecting that there will be reciprocation. If it makes your kid happy and it’s not a big deal for you, carry on. Others may have reasons, or not, but that’s up to them.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s a great thing that your daughter and her friends WANT to hang out at your place. It’s a great way to make sure you know your kid’s friends, can make sure you’re aware of what they are getting up to, etc.

I would rather constantly host sleepovers rather than send my kid to sleep at the home of a random family I might not know that well.

[Anonymous]

Never ever reciprocated or just not as much?

I’m a single parent so I don’t host as much- smaller house, less weekends and running around too much. But I do host in my own way.

People have their reasons so as long as you feel like these are good friends to your daughter, I would try to not be bothered by it.

[Anonymous]

Never did sleepovers after elementary because everyone is busy with activities. Sounds like you are overextending yourself trying to keep your daughter social.

[Anonymous]

Maybe people feel sorry for your kid that they don't have a sibling and so they send their kid over?

[Anonymous]

I would be thankful they like to come over, and I encourage my kids to have friends here. Then you know they're friends, you know what they're doing, and if they're safe.

When I was in HS, my BFFs parents went to bed at 9pm. We did whatever we wanted over there. Going back out, having boys over, anything we wanted.

[Anonymous]

I have friends who ask for their child to stay for a day or two with us when the parents travel.

So, you could just straight out ask if your child could stay with them for an afternoon or evening or overnight, for equity’s sake and to give yourself a break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love my daughter, I love my daughter's many friends. I enjoy sleepovers and do my best to make sure that they have a good dinner and breakfast and are comfortable.

What I don't love is that my daughter's friend's rarely reciprocate.

She is an only child and most of her friend's have brother's and sister's so is this because the other parents likely have more on their plate or just don't realize or what? It's not a huge problem and I know that my daughter is certainly polite enough, but I'm just getting tired of having kids over and never having her invited out. Is there something I'm missing, or is everyone just too busy these days? Or am I being taken advantage of?

I'm not sure how you are being taken advantage of if you are willingly hosting the sleepovers. It sounds like you do it because you and your daughter enjoy it. I do not enjoy sleepovers, at all. My DDs occasionally will have one friend sleep over, and they pretty much take care of and entertain themselves the whole time. I will make sure we have enough food/snacks, but they make their own breakfast. My husband and I both work and are running our kids around to practices, game, etc, and we like to have downtime on the weekend.

It is nice when other mom host sleepovers, and my daughters' always have a good time. However, I don't get the feeling that they expect other moms to reciprocate. At this age, it is more about who the daughter wants to have sleep over, rather than arranging it so other moms will reciprocate.

[Anonymous]

I host a lot and consider myself a pretty laid back parent but I HATE SLEEPOVERS.

My kids are always tired and grumpy the next day. I will give in every once in a blue moon when someone else invites but I'll never suggest we host one. Not because I don't like to host (I do--and host other gatherings all the time), but because I hate sleepovers.

[Anonymous]

Your kid is too old for hosted playdates (if a tween).

[Anonymous]

We gave an old, small house and our guest bathroom needs repairs, but we haven’t gotten around to it. So we don’t host, but we are generous guests!