S/O You can be canceled even if you aren’t a bigot, it happened to me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you won’t repeat it, then it probably was racist.

I won’t repeat it because I am afraid of the people who canceled me and I do think they’d find this thread and use it to further discredit me.

At this point all evidence indicates you are one of the following:

1. A troll

2. A racist

Both are plenty abundant around here so maybe you are both? Seems like the whole focus of this thread is to discredit the idea that racism exists and to portray any acknowledgment of racism as hysteria.

[Anonymous]

Unless you tell us what you said, you are a racist. Bcs not posting what you said means you know it was wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I completely see why you don’t want to provide details OP. But you aren’t going to get a bunch of people rushing to support you without details.

I am an employment discrimination lawyer. The certainty with which people believe they have been wronged bears absolutely no relation to whether they have actually been wronged. On both sides of of the equation— the victims and the accusers.

Not looking for support, just trying to get people to understand that a person being cancelled is not evidence of them deserving it. Sometimes deeply unfair things happen to people.

But it becomes a self-reinforcing belief: if they were cancelled, they must have deserved it, and if they deserved it, we shouldn’t listen to anything else they say.

I also get tired of people conflating the “cancellation” of rich and powerful people who committed public or well known wrongs (most of these people are never truly cancelled because they are rich and powerful, so unless they wind up in prison, they’ll be ok).

And private people who are cancelled on the basis of a rumor or unproven allegation. They aren’t the same. There was no formal investigation into my situation (I wish there had been, as it would have vindicated me) and most of the people who canceled me knew nothing more about it than they had been told third or fourth hand. Very different than a public investigation.

I was compelled to post because the thread about the teen reminded me of how easily rumors and an eager audience can destroy a person’s life.

[Anonymous]

What do you think would have happened if you asked one of these people to sit down and talk? Maybe tried to understand their perspective? Did you even try? You saying, "What I said wasn't racist" doesn't matter. What you said bothered someone, and you saying that they should not have been bothered is problematic. You don't get to tell other people how to feel about something you said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you won’t repeat it, then it probably was racist.

I won’t repeat it because I am afraid of the people who canceled me and I do think they’d find this thread and use it to further discredit me.

At this point all evidence indicates you are one of the following:

1. A troll

2. A racist

Both are plenty abundant around here so maybe you are both? Seems like the whole focus of this thread is to discredit the idea that racism exists and to portray any acknowledgment of racism as hysteria.

Or: I think racism exists and is terrible, but also that people will use the accusation of racism to discredit someone they don’t like because people like you will believe it without proof or context.

The fact that you are 100% unwilling to contemplate the truth if what I’m saying is so frustrating to me. Im not a troll or a racist. This really happened. Why is it so important to you to deny that it could?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I completely see why you don’t want to provide details OP. But you aren’t going to get a bunch of people rushing to support you without details.

I am an employment discrimination lawyer. The certainty with which people believe they have been wronged bears absolutely no relation to whether they have actually been wronged. On both sides of of the equation— the victims and the accusers.

Not looking for support, just trying to get people to understand that a person being cancelled is not evidence of them deserving it. Sometimes deeply unfair things happen to people.

But it becomes a self-reinforcing belief: if they were cancelled, they must have deserved it, and if they deserved it, we shouldn’t listen to anything else they say.

I also get tired of people conflating the “cancellation” of rich and powerful people who committed public or well known wrongs (most of these people are never truly cancelled because they are rich and powerful, so unless they wind up in prison, they’ll be ok).

And private people who are cancelled on the basis of a rumor or unproven allegation. They aren’t the same. There was no formal investigation into my situation (I wish there had been, as it would have vindicated me) and most of the people who canceled me knew nothing more about it than they had been told third or fourth hand. Very different than a public investigation.

I was compelled to post because the thread about the teen reminded me of how easily rumors and an eager audience can destroy a person’s life.

Just because you (and other people) aren't aware of what is racist, does not make you any less racist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you think would have happened if you asked one of these people to sit down and talk? Maybe tried to understand their perspective? Did you even try? You saying, "What I said wasn't racist" doesn't matter. What you said bothered someone, and you saying that they should not have been bothered is problematic. You don't get to tell other people how to feel about something you said.

I did request to sit down and talk. They didn’t want to because they KNEW they were lying. There were no victims of my comments. The people spreading these rumors about me were privileged white people who seized on something I said when they realized it sounded bad out of context. I would happily have discussed it with them, or anyone. I was not afforded the opportunity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you think would have happened if you asked one of these people to sit down and talk? Maybe tried to understand their perspective? Did you even try? You saying, "What I said wasn't racist" doesn't matter. What you said bothered someone, and you saying that they should not have been bothered is problematic. You don't get to tell other people how to feel about something you said.

What do you think would have happened if the person who took offense asked OP to sit down and talk? Instead they talked about them behind their back, like a coward. I have no respect for gossips. They nasty people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unless you tell us what you said, you are a racist. Bcs not posting what you said means you know it was wrong.

No, it’s protecting my identity. What I said was NOT wrong.

[Anonymous]

What was the point of that long OP with zero details ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you tell us what you said, you are a racist. Bcs not posting what you said means you know it was wrong.

No, it’s protecting my identity. What I said was NOT wrong.

So you say. I had a guy at work rant at me about how he was labeled a racist for saying we are all IMMIGRANTS here unless we are native, and what is racist about that?
Honestly, at this point, you are coming as horribly defensive and a bigot. Narcissist as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What was the point of that long OP with zero details ?

Narcissism, no doubt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you tell us what you said, you are a racist. Bcs not posting what you said means you know it was wrong.

No, it’s protecting my identity. What I said was NOT wrong.

So you say. I had a guy at work rant at me about how he was labeled a racist for saying we are all IMMIGRANTS here unless we are native, and what is racist about that?
Honestly, at this point, you are coming as horribly defensive and a bigot. Narcissist as well.

Are you trying to say the guy at work said something wrong?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you tell us what you said, you are a racist. Bcs not posting what you said means you know it was wrong.

No, it’s protecting my identity. What I said was NOT wrong.

Of course it was. Thank you for being the poster child for racists that never believe they are racist. It’s too bad you haven’t taken the time to reflect on your bigotry.

[Anonymous]

If OP can’t give exact details, maybe she could give examples of similar comments?