The term orphan

[Anonymous]

My mom said this when she lost her parents. She was 50+.

She is also a borderline person and it was definitely self serving and attention seeking.

Orphan is a word to describe the lived experience of a child. Losing your parents at 55 is just life.

[Anonymous]

For those of you who feel orphaned as adults, I found this book very helpful in dealing with my grief:

https://www.amazon.com/Orphaned-Adult-Understanding-Coping-Parents/dp/0738203610/ref=asc_df_0738203610_nodl?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312177564685&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=14973122264767900111&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9061109&hvtargid=pla-493293327023&psc=1&tag=&ref=&adgrpid=60258870697&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvadid=312177564685&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=14973122264767900111&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9061109&hvtargid=pla-493293327023&dplnkId=648c7f29-e992-4c02-b779-cbfe33023c54

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom lost her mom at 14 and her dad at age 46.

She called herself an orphan after she lost her dad.

It was pathetic.

Yeah! Your mom sounds like a big ol jerk.

[Anonymous]

I have a sibling who did this. She likes attention and is basically a sociopath, so it wasn’t surprising.

It was an odd thing to say, and other people at the funeral mentioned it to me.

[Anonymous]

UNICEF and its global partners define an orphan as “a child under 18 years of age who has lost one or both parents to any cause of death.”Aug 12, 2020

[Anonymous]

what an insult to (actual) orphans. you should find more intelligent friends.

[Anonymous]

I remember my dad turning to us at his father’s funeral and saying, well, now I’m an orphan. He was 100 percent making a dark joke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:UNICEF and its global partners define an orphan as “a child under 18 years of age who has lost one or both parents to any cause of death.”Aug 12, 2020

Because they are trying to set policies and provide aid. Do you really think adults calling themselves orphans are looking for help from UNICEF? For that matter, do you really think an 18 year old who has lost both parents is substantially different than a 17 year old?

[Anonymous]

If you’re too old for an orphanage you’re not an orphan.

[Anonymous]

My DH lost both of his parents by the time he was 12. He would absolutely not be offended or weirded out by adults who lost their parents as adults using the word “orphan”. I might be, but I’m pretty snotty and/or literal.

[Anonymous]

PP: actually, I just asked him and he wouldn’t be offended but would think it was weird and “doesn’t count”.

[Anonymous]

Pp whose DH was an orphan. He thinks that the label doesn’t apply after a certain age (20?] and no longer considers himself an orphan, but someone who was “orphaned”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I lost both my parents as an adult and I find their word choice dramatic and attention-seeking.

However; I wish there was a word to describe how one feels when both parents die and you don't have those mentors to talk with anymore, and you have now moved into their position. You do feel "orphaned" but that is not an appropriate word as it minimizes what orphaned kids go through.

Unmoored? As though you’ve lost your parents?

[Anonymous]

There's a great book on the topic:

https://www.amazon.com/Midlife-Orphan-Facing-Changes-Parents/dp/0425166937

It's not uncommon to feel this way and the term is used because there really isn't one to capture the feeling/phase of life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom lost her mom at 14 and her dad at age 46.

She called herself an orphan after she lost her dad.

It was pathetic.

Yeah! Your mom sounds like a big ol jerk.

She actually is. She is borderline and highly manipulative and toxic. She doesn’t have a close relationship with anyone. Thanks for chiming in!!