child assaulted by another student with no history and no provocation

Anonymous
FCPS has a terrible bullying problem. One of our kids was harrassed with death threats, was physically hurt, and had things thrown at them. When my kid complained to a teacher after one particularly nasty encounter, the teacher said the bully couldn't have done it because teacher didn't see it. Go sit down and be quiet. Good luck getting the school to do anything real about bullying. They seem to think that hanging "No Bully Zone" and "Practice Kindness" posters in the hallways is enough. Or sending counselors to the classroom to have kids fill out another worthless worksheet. I feel your pain, I feared sending my kid to school. FCPS needs to bring back suspensions (the stay at home kind) and even expulsion for the worst bullies.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:They won’t show you the video by choice but they will need to show the police, and the police will write their findings in their report. I’d definitely get the police involved, they will figure out exactly what happened. And yes, if the school is being uncooperative then I’d contact a lawyer too.


If you sue, you can also subpoena the video if the other kids' parents are the defendants or you'll get it in discovery if the school is the defendant. At the very least you need to send a letter to FCPS requesting that they preserve evidence due to impending litigation.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You people are calling the police because one tween boy pushed another tween boy?

You are all that is wrong with the world.


Years ago, the school would handle it. If they won't then call the police.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:This is OP. This is not a joke gone bad. The pusher very forcefully and intentionally shoved the kid. The kid minded his own business and did not even see the pusher coming.

The thread is not to question my involvement. It is to discuss avenues available to parents to protect kids in this scenario. All the parents want is for the pusher to stay the f away from their kid.



The first sentence of your original post literally states that this was a joke. So which is it? Get your story straight. Or do I smell troll?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is OP. This is not a joke gone bad. The pusher very forcefully and intentionally shoved the kid. The kid minded his own business and did not even see the pusher coming.

The thread is not to question my involvement. It is to discuss avenues available to parents to protect kids in this scenario. All the parents want is for the pusher to stay the f away from their kid.



The first sentence of your original post literally states that this was a joke. So which is it? Get your story straight. Or do I smell troll?


The victim was not in on the joke, did not see/expect the pusher and suffered a concussion. The pusher said it was a joke.

OP
Anonymous
MYOB, OP, unless you are an attorney representing the family. Stop stirring up trouble.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:This is OP. This is not a joke gone bad. The pusher very forcefully and intentionally shoved the kid. The kid minded his own business and did not even see the pusher coming.

The thread is not to question my involvement. It is to discuss avenues available to parents to protect kids in this scenario. All the parents want is for the pusher to stay the f away from their kid.



The first sentence of your original post literally states that this was a joke. So which is it? Get your story straight. Or do I smell troll?


The victim was not in on the joke, did not see/expect the pusher and suffered a concussion. The pusher said it was a joke.

OP


If this is the case, then I think it is problematic. Not to the level of involving the police, but the pusher's parents should be put on notice that this is basically assault and there will be no grace given for a second incident.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You people are calling the police because one tween boy pushed another tween boy?

You are all that is wrong with the world.

Your violent offspring is what is wrong.
Anonymous
If I were the kid’s parent I would at least want to see the video. It’s weird that the admin knows it was caught on camera but refuses to show it. Why are they hiding it?

Also, no documented history isn’t the same thing as no history. The fact that the kid who was shoved is terrified to go back shows that he believes it will happen again.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:MYOB, OP, unless you are an attorney representing the family. Stop stirring up trouble.


+1
Pot stirrer was my first thought, busy body was 2nd.
Anonymous
If you were the parent I would say I would ask for more info because it's one thing to have a bruise, but a concussion is a bigger deal. Yes, kids are literally jumping their friends as a practical joke. They post it on tiktok and it looks dangerous and painful seeing the kid fall to the floor.

The thing is you are not the parent. Let the parent do what she/he feels comfortable with. At this age kids do really stupid things. they need to learn from their mistakes, but if this was playing around between friends it's different from an attack.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You people are calling the police because one tween boy pushed another tween boy?

You are all that is wrong with the world.


Concussions are a traumatic brain injury. Generally speaking they cause memory issues, concentration issues, as well as balance and coodination issues.

If this happened in a work place, the perp would be out the door, and you'd be getting workers comp.


Adults should also know better then to be pushing people in order to complete a tiktok challenge. Adults should have better impulse control. The person would be fired and works comp would be paid to the person who was pushed.

The OP has said that the kids involved have no history, so this was the first time anything happened between these kids, and the pusher said it was meant to be a joke. It sounds like there was no intent to hurt anyone.

The pusher should be suspended by the school, his parents should pay medical bills, and the pusher should be told to stay away from the other kid.

The school is not going to be able to tell the parents about any discipline that is involved but I would guess that the pushed kids friends will probably tell him if the other kid misses school (suspended). The parents should ask for the contact information for the other parents so they can work out medical reimbursement.
Anonymous
FCPS will likely not do anything. If the kid who did it is scaring the child who got hurt to the point the kid does not want to go to school, then it is time to call the police. There is something more going on here.
Anonymous
If it were my child, I would contact the school administration and ask them to investigate and respond within a certain time frame (probably something like 72 hours from the incident). If I do not get a response in that time, I would file with the police for assault. I would let the administration know that would be the escalation if I did not get an appropriate response from them that included interviewing both children and asking other students who witnessed the incident to come forward and give a statement. Plus an appropriate response base on the investigation.

However, if you are like OP, then you MYOB. This is the parents' responsibility and this is not something that should be crowd-sourced. The parents have to determine what level of interaction they want with the process and what types of remediation they want to see from the school. Having a third-party, like OP, who was not there, and is not related to any of the students is only adding fuel to the fire, not helping achieve an appropriate end result.
Anonymous
If it were my child who was pushed, I would send a certified letter insist on seeing the recording immediately and asking that it be preserved if they refuse to comply. Without seeing the recording, I could not make an informed decision about how to proceed as to law enforcement. I’d want to see what my child was doing before the pushing and how the other boy reacted after the pushing. If the school didn’t release the recording, I would file a police report and get a lawyer to force the release. I would hate to get the police involved but if that was my only option I would do it. Another possibility would be to contact the other boy’s parents to ask them to agree to the school’s releasing the video - but I would only do that after sending the certified letter and the school turning me down and only if I had reason to believe the other parents might be cooperative, such as because they were hopeful the police would not have to be involved.

Other considerations: is my child somehow marginalized (small or “geeky” or in some other way a target)? Is the other boy part of some group that picks on others (actual gang or fratty, rich boy behavior, etc). I wouldn’t want to ruin anyone’s life, but the first duty would be to my child.

And to step up for OP - possibly s/he is getting involved because her friend is somehow uncomfortable going to the school or the police - possibly a minority or non-native speaker. OI’m not saying those are the only possibilities, but i was trying to picture this happening at my DC’s school, and odds are pretty high that could be the situation. Or maybe they’re so focused on helping their son recover that they haven’t been able to think clearly and asked OP for advice.
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