Heavy woman not getting many dates via OLD

[Anonymous]

“ Or maybe your d*** is small? ”

Women come up with any other insult besides gay, incel, or small d**k challenge impossible lmao.

[Anonymous]

It's very difficult to have success with online dating when you're overweight. I'm speaking from personal experience. It is what it is. The good news is you can lose weight and change your appearance while the hateful people making rude comments in this thread will still be a$$holes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“ The prior comment was mean-spirited, untrue, and completely unnecessary. ”

Only bottom feeders who can’t do better date fatties. That’s just a fact.

You're all fatties. 80% of Americans are overweight.

[Anonymous]

OP as another Bay Area person, most of the people who I know that have happy relationships that were formed here are from here. Did you grow up here? Also, which part of the bay are you in? SF is much different from the rest of the area, and Walnut Creek or Burlingame is very different from Antioch or Antioch type places.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“ The prior comment was mean-spirited, untrue, and completely unnecessary. ”

Only bottom feeders who can’t do better date fatties. That’s just a fact.

You've got an ego problem. You should work on that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“ The prior comment was mean-spirited, untrue, and completely unnecessary. ”

Only bottom feeders who can’t do better date fatties. That’s just a fact.

You've got an ego problem. You should work on that.

🤷‍♂️ This isn’t about me. Don’t hate the messenger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I don't get many dates from OLD as a woman in my late twenties living in the Bay Area. The big factor I assume is that I'm morbidly obese, have a BMI of 47.5. This is down from 53.0 last year. I'm trying to lose weight slowly and have stopped trying to date right now and plan to restart in the summer of fall. I'm wondering for larger woman that have success dating (are sought out), what is your BMI? I think I have a good personality and have a good job, but in OLD that is not most important.I'm wondering at what point I'm attractive not necessarily to the majority, but some people. It may be hard since there aren't many obese people in the area.

OP- I’m white, it seems that makes a difference? And I would say the men that tend to be at least somewhat into me are extremely nerdy, borderline ASD white men or south Asian men, almost all work in engineering/tech. I kind of realized I may be a back up for these men, as they probably don’t get a lot of attention. I tend to not get involved with the south Asian men because I feel like they’re fetishizing me for being white. Though I am nerdy and into nerdy men, I just don’t know, nobody ever seems super into me.

You do not have a good personality. You have a racist, shallow, personality, and lie saying it is the weight. First step is to start writing: I am vividly aware woman my size get dates even in much worse boy/girl ratio areas, but when men get exposed to my behavior, they lose interest.

NP. OP. Is not being racist. She is just noting that some South Asian men can be colorist and can fetishize whiteness. See Shake on season 2 of the reality show Love is Blind - he said he cannot find South Asian women attractive, even though he is South Asian, and has only dated blond haired white women. Of course not all South Asian men are like this, and even if some have a preference it doesn't mean they are fetishists. I think OP should vet the South Asian men who approach her online and give one or two that she is attracted to a chance before painting them all with the same brush. If OP is looking for marriage, I would vet the South Asian men for that as well, because it's also a thing for South Asians to date other races and ethnicities but when it's time to marry, they marry someone from their family's country of origin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
NP. OP. Is not being racist. She is just noting that some South Asian men can be colorist and can fetishize whiteness. See Shake on season 2 of the reality show Love is Blind - he said he cannot find South Asian women attractive, even though he is South Asian, and has only dated blond haired white women. Of course not all South Asian men are like this, and even if some have a preference it doesn't mean they are fetishists. I think OP should vet the South Asian men who approach her online and give one or two that she is attracted to a chance before painting them all with the same brush. If OP is looking for marriage, I would vet the South Asian men for that as well, because it's also a thing for South Asians to date other races and ethnicities but when it's time to marry, they marry someone from their family's country of origin.

Let me guess--you've spent some time in Charlottesville? You base your racism on Western-produced "reality" TV, not on real men. Neither of you has a good personality, and I wouldn't recommend dating you two to anyone-South Asian, White, or otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Sorry but for anyone vastly overweight ignoring it isn't the best way to deal with a problem. I would address that issue first then work on dating. Go to weight watchers, start walking, get a stationary bike. I did that and rode it while I watched tv. That worked out great for me to lost 15 lbs. Improve your diet.

Heavy women not getting dates OP isn't the real problem. Make a real effort to drop the lbs, and I will bet the rest will fall into place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't get many dates from OLD as a woman in my late twenties living in the Bay Area. The big factor I assume is that I'm morbidly obese, have a BMI of 47.5. This is down from 53.0 last year. I'm trying to lose weight slowly and have stopped trying to date right now and plan to restart in the summer of fall. I'm wondering for larger woman that have success dating (are sought out), what is your BMI? I think I have a good personality and have a good job, but in OLD that is not most important.I'm wondering at what point I'm attractive not necessarily to the majority, but some people. It may be hard since there aren't many obese people in the area.

Work on your BMI like it's a job. Put the dating in the back ground. Your referring to yourself like you plan to be obese for the rest of your life when you don't have to.

You've accepted it which means you've given up. Don't do that OP. You sound very nice and deserve to be happier. You're young and don't want early health issues.

[Anonymous]

Do you really want to date the kind of men that are into obese women?

It sounds like you're doing a great job getting in shape. Keep it up! Once you get down to a more healthy bodyweight you'll have so much attention that you'll be posting threads about how to be invisible again

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get many dates from OLD as a woman in my late twenties living in the Bay Area. The big factor I assume is that I'm morbidly obese, have a BMI of 47.5. This is down from 53.0 last year. I'm trying to lose weight slowly and have stopped trying to date right now and plan to restart in the summer of fall. I'm wondering for larger woman that have success dating (are sought out), what is your BMI? I think I have a good personality and have a good job, but in OLD that is not most important.I'm wondering at what point I'm attractive not necessarily to the majority, but some people. It may be hard since there aren't many obese people in the area.

Work on your BMI like it's a job. Put the dating in the back ground. Your referring to yourself like you plan to be obese for the rest of your life when you don't have to.

You've accepted it which means you've given up. Don't do that OP. You sound very nice and deserve to be happier. You're young and don't want early health issues.

This was my initial reaction as well. As OP has recognized she is more than just overweight, she is is significantly overweight. The good news is at her weight even modest changes should enable her to lose weight fairly rapidly. I'm not saying that it will be easy to become thin/fit and that doesn't even need to be her goal. Even if she drops down to being simply overweight she will be in the same range as most other Americans and will dramatically improve her dating options. Being significantly overweight hits you not just on the appearance front but also the known associated health concerns much like being a smoker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I don't get many dates from OLD as a woman in my late twenties living in the Bay Area. The big factor I assume is that I'm morbidly obese, have a BMI of 47.5. This is down from 53.0 last year. I'm trying to lose weight slowly and have stopped trying to date right now and plan to restart in the summer of fall. I'm wondering for larger woman that have success dating (are sought out), what is your BMI? I think I have a good personality and have a good job, but in OLD that is not most important.I'm wondering at what point I'm attractive not necessarily to the majority, but some people. It may be hard since there aren't many obese people in the area.

OP- I’m white, it seems that makes a difference? And I would say the men that tend to be at least somewhat into me are extremely nerdy, borderline ASD white men or south Asian men, almost all work in engineering/tech. I kind of realized I may be a back up for these men, as they probably don’t get a lot of attention. I tend to not get involved with the south Asian men because I feel like they’re fetishizing me for being white. Though I am nerdy and into nerdy men, I just don’t know, nobody ever seems super into me.

You do not have a good personality. You have a racist, shallow, personality, and lie saying it is the weight. First step is to start writing: I am vividly aware woman my size get dates even in much worse boy/girl ratio areas, but when men get exposed to my behavior, they lose interest.

NP. OP. Is not being racist. She is just noting that some South Asian men can be colorist and can fetishize whiteness. See Shake on season 2 of the reality show Love is Blind - he said he cannot find South Asian women attractive, even though he is South Asian, and has only dated blond haired white women. Of course not all South Asian men are like this, and even if some have a preference it doesn't mean they are fetishists. I think OP should vet the South Asian men who approach her online and give one or two that she is attracted to a chance before painting them all with the same brush. If OP is looking for marriage, I would vet the South Asian men for that as well, because it's also a thing for South Asians to date other races and ethnicities but when it's time to marry, they marry someone from their family's country of origin.

People seem to forget that Deepti on Love is Blind ALSO only dated blonde men until they met!