Heavy woman not getting many dates via OLD

[Anonymous]

I was wondering was OLD was too.

[Anonymous]

OLD - online dating

[Anonymous]

OP should pause the dating for a couple years while she goes through bariatric surgery and then plastic surgery for skin removal. BTDT. It's the only way a person her size will ever be remotely attractive to decent men.

[Anonymous]

Dress well for your body shape, do all the beauty things without going overboard, and keep working on your overall health (physical. mental, emotional). Don't make OLD a priority. You can do it in the background but focus on putting yourself in physical places where you can run into decent men as much as possible. Join groups in your neighborhood, volunteer, attend religious services, take a dance class. Whatever it takes to get yourself out there and meet lots and lots of people. This is what I'm trying to do myself. Good luck and be kind to yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Doesn’t matter if it’s only 1% or 20% of men who will consider dating her, those men will be broken or unattractive themselves in some way.

Do you date? Asking because you are quite unattractive in some way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Doesn’t matter if it’s only 1% or 20% of men who will consider dating her, those men will be broken or unattractive themselves in some way.

Do you date? Asking because you are quite unattractive in some way.

Yup, and she’s not fat either. Sorry you’re triggered by such a commonplace observation. I expect it’s because you’re fat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Doesn’t matter if it’s only 1% or 20% of men who will consider dating her, those men will be broken or unattractive themselves in some way.

Do you date? Asking because you are quite unattractive in some way.

Yup, and she’s not fat either. Sorry you’re triggered by such a commonplace observation. I expect it’s because you’re fat.

Or maybe your d*** is small? It's all subjective...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP should pause the dating for a couple years while she goes through bariatric surgery and then plastic surgery for skin removal. BTDT. It's the only way a person her size will ever be remotely attractive to decent men.

Men who might be attracted to a bigger woman can’t be decent?

[Anonymous]

Dress well for your shape, get a high quality haircut, do your make up well, and keep working on yourself. Make sure you are pursuing interests and hobbies so that you are interesting to talk to - not just about work. You will eventually find your match.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Doesn’t matter if it’s only 1% or 20% of men who will consider dating her, those men will be broken or unattractive themselves in some way.

Do you date? Asking because you are quite unattractive in some way.

DP. I agree.

The prior comment was mean-spirited, untrue, and completely unnecessary.

Please ignore that person, OP.

To OP: congrats on your successful efforts so far! I am sure you are healthier for it, and hopefully you can keep it going.

Even if you can’t, please try to be mindful of the power of confidence. Remember your own awesomeness- just as you are; in this moment.

When your dating leads to the relationship you seek, that confidence in yourself will be such a powerful force for good.

[Anonymous]

Lots of men groups like fat curvy women. Find them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP should pause the dating for a couple years while she goes through bariatric surgery and then plastic surgery for skin removal. BTDT. It's the only way a person her size will ever be remotely attractive to decent men.

I see that the self-hate is still going on, despite of the surgery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP should pause the dating for a couple years while she goes through bariatric surgery and then plastic surgery for skin removal. BTDT. It's the only way a person her size will ever be remotely attractive to decent men.

I see that the self-hate is still going on, despite of the surgery.

I think some of the posts here have been unnecessarily cruel to OP. But PP experienced something that is likely true. She had trouble finding people to date when she was at an extreme weight, and when she lost the weight and extra skin she found she had a much larger pool of people to choose from.

That said I just looked up what 47 BMI really is, and it is heavy, but it is not like, my 600 pound life heavy! And I think OP that the other advice to get a nice haircut and go get some nice clothes and a nice picture taken is a good idea! And yes of course keep working on that weight loss. I have gone from around 38 BMI to 28 BMI in the last couple of years and the payoff is not in who thinks you're hot, or how you look, but in how your body can MOVE and how you feel inside of it (like walking up the stairs).

Good luck to you! And don't give up!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I don't get many dates from OLD as a woman in my late twenties living in the Bay Area. The big factor I assume is that I'm morbidly obese, have a BMI of 47.5. This is down from 53.0 last year. I'm trying to lose weight slowly and have stopped trying to date right now and plan to restart in the summer of fall. I'm wondering for larger woman that have success dating (are sought out), what is your BMI? I think I have a good personality and have a good job, but in OLD that is not most important.I'm wondering at what point I'm attractive not necessarily to the majority, but some people. It may be hard since there aren't many obese people in the area.

OP- I’m white, it seems that makes a difference? And I would say the men that tend to be at least somewhat into me are extremely nerdy, borderline ASD white men or south Asian men, almost all work in engineering/tech. I kind of realized I may be a back up for these men, as they probably don’t get a lot of attention. I tend to not get involved with the south Asian men because I feel like they’re fetishizing me for being white. Though I am nerdy and into nerdy men, I just don’t know, nobody ever seems super into me.

You do not have a good personality. You have a racist, shallow, personality, and lie saying it is the weight. First step is to start writing: I am vividly aware woman my size get dates even in much worse boy/girl ratio areas, but when men get exposed to my behavior, they lose interest.

[Anonymous]

“ The prior comment was mean-spirited, untrue, and completely unnecessary. ”

Only bottom feeders who can’t do better date fatties. That’s just a fact.