Broke off an affair. Going through depression

[Anonymous]

You never even had sex. JFC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well I'm sure DCUM will have lots of sympathy and support for you!

😂

yeah seriously, I'm over here playing my tiny violin...

[Anonymous]

Divorce your wife, convince her to divorce her husband, both of you move to a far away land to live happily ever after…then find yourself sulking like a little bi@t** a year later because she left you for someone else.

[Anonymous]

I think you should divorce your wife. She is not the one for you.

[Anonymous]

Texting anyone everyday is cray. You’re going through withdrawal. Your little ego isn’t getting stroked

[Anonymous]

Seems like you had more of an affair with your phone (or more specifically, with getting attention and adoration via your phone), than with the OW. Figure out why you needed that attention so bad, fix what is broken, and you will start to heal.

[Anonymous]

Now, just tossing this out there, any chance for a 3 way?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give her a call and figure out how to be more discrete. Enjoy the extra action.

Discreet

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here
I dont expect sympathy. I am pos and a coward.
The woman is a friend's wife, not a good friend, more like an acquaintance. We just got a long. It started with texting and then a kiss. We were both hesistant since we didn't want this to spiral out of control. But 3 months into it, I couldnt go a day without texting or calling her.
We never had sex mainly because we couldn't find the time since we both work from home.

Her husband found an intimate message after she left her phone in the kitchen. and the next thing I received was a call from him. She texted me after saying she can't continue this and blocked me. It's been a week and I still feel like shit.
My wife of course hates me, can't believe id do that and have a crush on someone. The sad part is that i'm more annoyed at myself for getting caught knowing it was a bad time to text and I go through the scenario in my head over and over again.

The thing I will never understand is how anyone in this situation does not know how to handle their texts and phone. Obviously you silence the alerts and lock your phone, clean up any back ups, and just control your sh*t. Otherwise be in an open situation. It is so simple that I have to think you are basically subconsciously wanting to get caught and create a stir if you don’t do this.

OP yes you f’d up, on multiple levels. You should have decided what you wanted and gotten in accordingly. You wanted to have your cake and eat it too, it doesn’t work that way. Now your wife is never going to trust you again and this other relationship is going down the drain. You need to get clear on what you want here.

OP, this is an interesting question — what were you hoping would happen with this situation? How did you see it playing out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here
I dont expect sympathy. I am pos and a coward.
The woman is a friend's wife, not a good friend, more like an acquaintance. We just got a long. It started with texting and then a kiss. We were both hesistant since we didn't want this to spiral out of control. But 3 months into it, I couldnt go a day without texting or calling her.
We never had sex mainly because we couldn't find the time since we both work from home.

Her husband found an intimate message after she left her phone in the kitchen. and the next thing I received was a call from him. She texted me after saying she can't continue this and blocked me. It's been a week and I still feel like shit.
My wife of course hates me, can't believe id do that and have a crush on someone. The sad part is that i'm more annoyed at myself for getting caught knowing it was a bad time to text and I go through the scenario in my head over and over again.

When I realized I wanted to be with other men more than I wanted to be with my husband, both emotionally and physically, that's when I introduced the topic of divorce and started working on my exit plan. If she's not already doing that, you should. Even if it means you are alone for awhile. That would probably be more therapeutic for you than therapy would be.

[Anonymous]

OP, despite you being married, you are essentially going through a "break up" just like before you were married. It sucks, you miss the person, you feel you can't live without them, then magically in time the longing fades and you forget. You WILL move on. So you now have 2 choices: move on with your best foot forward, for your marriage, or make it a real nasty mess more so than it already is. WAKE UP! You need to snap out of it and put all hands on deck in your marriage. You are lucky it's not over. Next time, you probably wouldn't be. She will leave you.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been there. It hurts like any breakup. The good thing is that this person is still perfect. They’ve never farted in front of you or chewed loudly or snored.
And now they’re gone. It’s gonna heart really bad and very little thing will remind you of them. But time will pass and heal
Those wounds.
But one week has been a bit. Sulking for an emotional affair is nuts.

[Anonymous]

Lucky your wife is still with you. Cut your losses and move on. You keep playing with fire and you’re going to get burnt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:+1 for therapy. Really, it will help.

No, it will not. Once a cheater, always a cheater.

This isn't true. PEople cheat for different reasons.

Yeah, I’m one of those “cheating is never okay!” harpies and I don’t believe that cheating is a permanent personality trait. I hope OP’s wife dumps him but I think that unlike his marriage, he can repair himself and ultimately come out of this a better, happier person.

[Anonymous]

Wow, no cheater is going to win any character awards, but you are really low - your AP was a friend’s wife, and when caught all you moan about is YOUR feelings? You seriously destroyed another marriage (even if it survives) and your own wife, and express zero remorse for your friend, your own wife or any of your sh!tty decisions and actions? Even your AP seemed to immediately snap back to reality when caught. You REALLY need therapy and to find empathy and remorse.