Avoiding duty sex?

post reply Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:37
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Anonymous
Today being one of the big 4- birthday, anniversary, mother/father's day, Valentina's day - my spouse is already gearing up for what will inevitably be bad duty sex. Love my spouse, but simply uninterested. Any tips on shutting this down in advance, without any drama or hurt feelings?
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:39
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Anonymous
This has to be my wife.
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:39
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Anonymous
You can shut it down in advance, but you won't do so without the consequences you fear.
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:41
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Anonymous
If you love him, have a drink, take the lead, and make it good.
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:42
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Anonymous
It depends. "Simply uninterested" doesn't suffice. Part of being in a LTR is willingness to share sex when partner is interested. If you really hate the idea, what's so hard about giving a good BJ (or suitable equivalent if you're male, but somehow I doubt it . . .). Often Duty Sex turns into something at least mildly enjoyable, at least for me.

-Married almost 50 years
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:45
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Anonymous
Your poor spouse
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:46
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Today being one of the big 4- birthday, anniversary, mother/father's day, Valentina's day - my spouse is already gearing up for what will inevitably be bad duty sex. Love my spouse, but simply uninterested. Any tips on shutting this down in advance, without any drama or hurt feelings?


Nope. Try an alternate route like focusing on what you really love about your spouse and how tonight can be a gift to him/her.
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:48
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Anonymous
Not a real post.
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:49
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Anonymous
Is there some special circumstance going on right now? Or are you just gearing up for the divorce?
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:51
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Anonymous
If you can't muster up the interest for one of the 4 expected times per year (according to your list) eventually your spouse will become withdrawn and look elsewhere. Go somehwere quiet, look at some porn, touch yourself and get in the mood. Open your eyes. Open your mind.
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:53
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Anonymous
I'm so lucky
[Post New]02/14/2015 10:56
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Anonymous
Why are you so lucky,, pp?
[Post New]02/14/2015 11:10
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Anonymous
Your duty is to give up that booty
[Post New]02/14/2015 11:13
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Anonymous
Pretend you appreciate your spouse and that you appreciate he sacrificed something when he promised to be monogamous. See if that sparks any interest. If not, tell him you'll remain monogamous while he's free to play the field if he wants.
[Post New]02/14/2015 11:15
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Anonymous
Are you interested other times? If it's just on days like Valentine's day that you feel pressured into it, but you're good at sex at other times, then no big deal. How many times this week have you already initiated sex with your spouse?
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