Former Lt. Gov. Justin Fairfax - murder/suicide?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't it had also been disruptive to change schools for the kids? I do think it's strange they kept the kids in private schools. That would have been a start to getting on track financially. How were they able to accrue that much debt?

Credit cards, business credit rising in the cost tails of the dentist

Can you imaging him running the state of Virginia if he ran his household finances so poorly? Mind blowing.

Honestly they could have been doing quite well before. It’s a sad truth that a prolonged illness can wipe out the fortunes of most two earner professional couples.

Of course Jason’s “illness” here was self inflicted (sorry, I don’t buy the addiction BS), but I’m sure Cerina still felt herself hamstrung as the “caretaker” for her family. As a dentist, if she’s not working, she’s not earning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't it had also been disruptive to change schools for the kids? I do think it's strange they kept the kids in private schools. That would have been a start to getting on track financially. How were they able to accrue that much debt?

Credit cards, business credit rising in the cost tails of the dentist

Can you imaging him running the state of Virginia if he ran his household finances so poorly? Mind blowing.

Honestly they could have been doing quite well before. It’s a sad truth that a prolonged illness can wipe out the fortunes of most two earner professional couples.

Of course Jason’s “illness” here was self inflicted (sorry, I don’t buy the addiction BS), but I’m sure Cerina still felt herself hamstrung as the “caretaker” for her family. As a dentist, if she’s not working, she’s not earning.

Who's Jason?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't it had also been disruptive to change schools for the kids? I do think it's strange they kept the kids in private schools. That would have been a start to getting on track financially. How were they able to accrue that much debt?

I mean, two small business owners would have a significant amount of debt anyway. Her from her degree and buying all the necessary equipment to sustain a dental practice, and him having to cover fees and whatnot for cases on contingency. And it’s not like he made a ton of money when in public service. But one of the news reports also cited over the top trips he was booking for third parties, so I wonder if he just decided to run her into the ground at some point.

Which should have been addressed in equitable distribution, but of course the case never got there and family court in Fairfax County runs so slow it could have been years.

I can't believe the people who are blaming this woman for not wanting to take her kids out of schools and off teams where they were thriving. I understand facing reality, but I also understand that in theory family court is supposed to help kids maintain the life they are used to, even if in practice it falls so far short of that it's not even funny. It takes a long, painful time to learn the reality of the family court system.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the saddest thread ever. Pages and pages of blaming the victim. Makes me sick.

Agree. It’s a coping mechanism so people can feel like this would never happen to them.

+1 million. And so people don't have to look at the reality of what happens to abused women (and a large number of addicts are at a minimum emotional abusers - gaslighting for example is pretty much required to maintain an addiction) even when they take the trite advice to "just leave!" as if it's easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is the saddest thread ever. Pages and pages of blaming the victim. Makes me sick.

+1

It's actually worse than victim blaming. It's apologizing for a murderous, drunk, rapist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the saddest thread ever. Pages and pages of blaming the victim. Makes me sick.

+1

It's actually worse than victim blaming. It's apologizing for a murderous, drunk, rapist.

Remember: once upon a time--and, maybe still, she loved him. He was the father of her children.

That complicates things. So sad.

I have to admit that when the woman came out with the rape accusation from so many years before, I was doubtful. The "me too" movement was going full blast then, but I know women who would lie. (I am a woman.) I would not have kept quiet for years about that. Would I have gone to authorities as a very young woman? Not sure. I would now, but not sure I would have then.
Remember, the Duke Lacrosse case? All lies that so many people accepted because they wanted to do so. Same with Ford. They wanted to believe her--even though there were so many holes in her story.
Remember the story about the woman who said Kav spiked drinks at parties? Turned out to be totally bogus--and written by the same reporter who is currently reporting about Patel in the Atlantic.

My phrase would be: "Listen to all women." Not "believe." Gently question them and check the facts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the saddest thread ever. Pages and pages of blaming the victim. Makes me sick.

+1

It's actually worse than victim blaming. It's apologizing for a murderous, drunk, rapist.

Remember: once upon a time--and, maybe still, she loved him. He was the father of her children.

That complicates things. So sad.

I have to admit that when the woman came out with the rape accusation from so many years before, I was doubtful. The "me too" movement was going full blast then, but I know women who would lie. (I am a woman.) I would not have kept quiet for years about that. Would I have gone to authorities as a very young woman? Not sure. I would now, but not sure I would have then.
Remember, the Duke Lacrosse case? All lies that so many people accepted because they wanted to do so. Same with Ford. They wanted to believe her--even though there were so many holes in her story.
Remember the story about the woman who said Kav spiked drinks at parties? Turned out to be totally bogus--and written by the same reporter who is currently reporting about Patel in the Atlantic.

My phrase would be: "Listen to all women." Not "believe." Gently question them and check the facts.

There was plenty of evidence against Kav that was buried. You sound like a Pickmesha.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the saddest thread ever. Pages and pages of blaming the victim. Makes me sick.

+1

It's actually worse than victim blaming. It's apologizing for a murderous, drunk, rapist.

Remember: once upon a time--and, maybe still, she loved him. He was the father of her children.

That complicates things. So sad.

I have to admit that when the woman came out with the rape accusation from so many years before, I was doubtful. The "me too" movement was going full blast then, but I know women who would lie. (I am a woman.) I would not have kept quiet for years about that. Would I have gone to authorities as a very young woman? Not sure. I would now, but not sure I would have then.
Remember, the Duke Lacrosse case? All lies that so many people accepted because they wanted to do so. Same with Ford. They wanted to believe her--even though there were so many holes in her story.
Remember the story about the woman who said Kav spiked drinks at parties? Turned out to be totally bogus--and written by the same reporter who is currently reporting about Patel in the Atlantic.

My phrase would be: "Listen to all women." Not "believe." Gently question them and check the facts.

There was plenty of evidence against Kav that was buried. You sound like a Pickmesha.

They were presenting fake accusations. Pretty sure if there was any "there" there, they would have presented real evidence.
Just like Duke Lacrosse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the saddest thread ever. Pages and pages of blaming the victim. Makes me sick.

+1

It's actually worse than victim blaming. It's apologizing for a murderous, drunk, rapist.

Remember: once upon a time--and, maybe still, she loved him. He was the father of her children.

That complicates things. So sad.

I have to admit that when the woman came out with the rape accusation from so many years before, I was doubtful. The "me too" movement was going full blast then, but I know women who would lie. (I am a woman.) I would not have kept quiet for years about that. Would I have gone to authorities as a very young woman? Not sure. I would now, but not sure I would have then.
Remember, the Duke Lacrosse case? All lies that so many people accepted because they wanted to do so. Same with Ford. They wanted to believe her--even though there were so many holes in her story.
Remember the story about the woman who said Kav spiked drinks at parties? Turned out to be totally bogus--and written by the same reporter who is currently reporting about Patel in the Atlantic.

My phrase would be: "Listen to all women." Not "believe." Gently question them and check the facts.

There was plenty of evidence against Kav that was buried. You sound like a Pickmesha.

And yet, he handled those accusations with dignities, did not become an alcoholic, did not rack family debts, did not kill his wife in kids' presence. So many men faced accusations of sexual assault who went through the proper process to resolve it, including trials.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is the saddest thread ever. Pages and pages of blaming the victim. Makes me sick.

+1

It's actually worse than victim blaming. It's apologizing for a murderous, drunk, rapist.

Remember: once upon a time--and, maybe still, she loved him. He was the father of her children.

That complicates things. So sad.

I have to admit that when the woman came out with the rape accusation from so many years before, I was doubtful. The "me too" movement was going full blast then, but I know women who would lie. (I am a woman.) I would not have kept quiet for years about that. Would I have gone to authorities as a very young woman? Not sure. I would now, but not sure I would have then.
Remember, the Duke Lacrosse case? All lies that so many people accepted because they wanted to do so. Same with Ford. They wanted to believe her--even though there were so many holes in her story.
Remember the story about the woman who said Kav spiked drinks at parties? Turned out to be totally bogus--and written by the same reporter who is currently reporting about Patel in the Atlantic.

My phrase would be: "Listen to all women." Not "believe." Gently question them and check the facts.

It doesn't complicate anything in terms of her being the victim. If anything it makes her more the victim. Typically in situations like these the guy has spent years breaking the woman down. She didn't marry him knowing he was like this - in fact he wasn't, as he wasn't an addict before. And the kids chose NONE of this.

When people start to talk about "you chose him as the father of your kids" you participate in the grossest victim blaming possible. As if people never present a false image, sometimes for years. As if they don't change. As if coercive control and abuse aren't complicated beasts.

You know the only commonality that research has found between victims in situations like this? It's not that they're a certain income class, or race, or have a certain family background. It's that they are kind people (see: the work of Emma Katz - https://dremmakatz.com/coercive-control/explaining-coercive-control-to-people-who-dont-quite-get-it-a-series/).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn't it had also been disruptive to change schools for the kids? I do think it's strange they kept the kids in private schools. That would have been a start to getting on track financially. How were they able to accrue that much debt?

I mean, two small business owners would have a significant amount of debt anyway. Her from her degree and buying all the necessary equipment to sustain a dental practice, and him having to cover fees and whatnot for cases on contingency. And it’s not like he made a ton of money when in public service. But one of the news reports also cited over the top trips he was booking for third parties, so I wonder if he just decided to run her into the ground at some point.

Which should have been addressed in equitable distribution, but of course the case never got there and family court in Fairfax County runs so slow it could have been years.

I can't believe the people who are blaming this woman for not wanting to take her kids out of schools and off teams where they were thriving. I understand facing reality, but I also understand that in theory family court is supposed to help kids maintain the life they are used to, even if in practice it falls so far short of that it's not even funny. It takes a long, painful time to learn the reality of the family court system.

She knew she cannot afford to maintain the same life style; and she knew that he will not be able to pay much after divorce; she knew they could not afford expensive private schools. She probably was planning to impute a high income to him, which could push him to the edge, considering the mental state he was in.

Since he was unemployed and had no income as far as anyone knows, she was likely going to have to pay him alimony.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“Watson's attorney said that Watson had one interaction with Fairfax after the alleged assault outside a campus party, during which Watson said "Why did you do it?" and reported Fairfax replied, "I knew that because of what happened to you last year, you'd be too afraid to say anything."[70] Watson's attorney said this showed Fairfax "used the prior rape of his 'friend' against her when he chose to rape her in a premeditated way".[71] Fairfax denied the second accusation, issuing a statement saying”

From Wikipedia

Wow. Did his wife just ignore this huge waving red flag— made public in 2019? Put blinders on ? One of their children is a daughter, if I understand correctly.

He was a sick man yet I guess she had a lot to lose financially and reputation wise if she’d left him earlier?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Watson's attorney said that Watson had one interaction with Fairfax after the alleged assault outside a campus party, during which Watson said "Why did you do it?" and reported Fairfax replied, "I knew that because of what happened to you last year, you'd be too afraid to say anything."[70] Watson's attorney said this showed Fairfax "used the prior rape of his 'friend' against her when he chose to rape her in a premeditated way".[71] Fairfax denied the second accusation, issuing a statement saying”

From Wikipedia

Wow. Did his wife just ignore this huge waving red flag— made public in 2019? Put blinders on ? One of their children is a daughter, if I understand correctly.

He was a sick man yet I guess she had a lot to lose financially and reputation wise if she’d left him earlier?

Maybe this was the beginning of the end of the relationship? Maybe this is what opened her eyes.

Maybe she believed him because to not believe him would upturn their lives.

The accusation was in the past and more abstract. So it’s easy to set it aside.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Watson's attorney said that Watson had one interaction with Fairfax after the alleged assault outside a campus party, during which Watson said "Why did you do it?" and reported Fairfax replied, "I knew that because of what happened to you last year, you'd be too afraid to say anything."[70] Watson's attorney said this showed Fairfax "used the prior rape of his 'friend' against her when he chose to rape her in a premeditated way".[71] Fairfax denied the second accusation, issuing a statement saying”

From Wikipedia

Wow. Did his wife just ignore this huge waving red flag— made public in 2019? Put blinders on ? One of their children is a daughter, if I understand correctly.

He was a sick man yet I guess she had a lot to lose financially and reputation wise if she’d left him earlier?

Joe Biden believed him. The overwhelming consensus of this board at the time as to believe him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“Watson's attorney said that Watson had one interaction with Fairfax after the alleged assault outside a campus party, during which Watson said "Why did you do it?" and reported Fairfax replied, "I knew that because of what happened to you last year, you'd be too afraid to say anything."[70] Watson's attorney said this showed Fairfax "used the prior rape of his 'friend' against her when he chose to rape her in a premeditated way".[71] Fairfax denied the second accusation, issuing a statement saying”

From Wikipedia

Wow. Did his wife just ignore this huge waving red flag— made public in 2019? Put blinders on ? One of their children is a daughter, if I understand correctly.

He was a sick man yet I guess she had a lot to lose financially and reputation wise if she’d left him earlier?

Joe Biden believed him. The overwhelming consensus of this board at the time as to believe him.

Lies
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/861103.page
https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/846889.page