Guac and queso if you make over $450k

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But, I'm pp, and I disagree that buying Taylor Swift tickets for your kids will teach them about value, which is the very point of this thread. So, why bother getting angry about occasional guac when you're going to shell out $1500 pp for concert tickets.

Yeah, it does, but you don’t get it. All I can do is suggest you go back and reread prior responses. You’re probably the same person who believes kids don’t need this lesson bc they will learn it anyway by seeing prices on a menu.

People here have argued endlessly that if you buy guac every week you cannot possibly save. People have said it will cut down on your overall savings goals. You could buy extra guac for 41+ years weekly to add up to a single Taylor Swift concert.

You're the one who doesn't get it. Based on OP's premise and these response, not on what you believe (spend on outing that will live in your memories forevr). You can't have it both ways!

My guess is everyone on this post who is a mindful spender, gets what I am saying. I’ll make one final effort:

Mindful spenders spend money on wants but:

- not on every want

- generally not without considering the value of the purchase (is this a good/fair deal for x - and x is anything from an add on like guac, to gas, to a coffee)

- they focus on making choices where the want has meaning to them (yes to a vacation where they spend more, no to a popcorn at the movie)

- they focus on finances for the future, even if it means every want is not obtained in the present

- they usually don’t feel deprived when saying no to a want

This means that they may save a year of coffee money but also get TSwift tickets. Non mindful spenders live more for today and get both the coffee and tickets when they want them.

Everyone gets your insufferability. Are you a man? Because you’re acting like one. 👍🏻 A lack of reading comprehension and a pedantic nature.

It does reek of mansplaining, doesn’t it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you are someone who gets what you want but truly wants very little. A non-mindful spender who spends way less than most mindful ones?

If you get what you want without consideration of price, you’re not a mindful spender. You don’t give it another thought regarding value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc.

But isn't what we want often based on price to begin with?

Not if you’re not mindful. You want it, you get it, obviously within reason. You’re not getting a Birken just bc you want it. But if you’re not mindful, then if you want it, you don’t have any consideration for the price most of the time. You want it, you get it.

Mindful considers the questions above: value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc. Mindful still means you’ll get the item but have almost instantaneously run through whether it was worth it: Diet Coke, coffee, this gas station, fruit, whatever.

But we want things based on our experience and that ties into price. I want a Starbucks latte because I've had them and liked them. So I buy one without a second thought. I've never had a super expensive, super fancy latte. Don't even know where I'd get one. So I'm unlikely to want one to begin with.

Absolutely not…I like mangoes but don’t buy them if they are over certain price. I would almost never get a coffee out unless meeting a friend.

It sounds like you do want things (mangoes, coffee out) based on your experience. I'm not saying you want them frequently or at any price (the Starbucks example is of a non-mindful spender as proposed by the PP). I'm saying that if mangoes were $$$, you'd probably never have had one so you wouldn't know you liked them and wouldn't ever want one now.

I could have had them at a restaurant, wedding, friend’s house, etc.

Ok. Let's say $$$ is $5k.

I don’t understand what you are trying to say.

I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

And I said that’s not true. I could attend a wedding, xmas party, or work meeting where caviar is served. I could be on vacation where something is offered. I could have read about ostrich eggs or sushi and want to try it.

The point is that just bc I like it or want to try it, doesn’t mean the cost justifies the purchase/satisfying the desire. Likely, mindful spenders are more flexible (I’m okay w/no appetizer/guac/mango and am just as happy with tap water/the basic order/the matinee/whatever). Gratification is more flexibly delayed with no feeling of depravation.

Maybe you've had mango (because you could afford it or someone else could afford to give it to you - like at a wedding) or you have never had it but want to try it. Either way, your life experience is shaping your desire to have one now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you are someone who gets what you want but truly wants very little. A non-mindful spender who spends way less than most mindful ones?

If you get what you want without consideration of price, you’re not a mindful spender. You don’t give it another thought regarding value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc.

But isn't what we want often based on price to begin with?

Not if you’re not mindful. You want it, you get it, obviously within reason. You’re not getting a Birken just bc you want it. But if you’re not mindful, then if you want it, you don’t have any consideration for the price most of the time. You want it, you get it.

Mindful considers the questions above: value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc. Mindful still means you’ll get the item but have almost instantaneously run through whether it was worth it: Diet Coke, coffee, this gas station, fruit, whatever.

But we want things based on our experience and that ties into price. I want a Starbucks latte because I've had them and liked them. So I buy one without a second thought. I've never had a super expensive, super fancy latte. Don't even know where I'd get one. So I'm unlikely to want one to begin with.

Absolutely not…I like mangoes but don’t buy them if they are over certain price. I would almost never get a coffee out unless meeting a friend.

It sounds like you do want things (mangoes, coffee out) based on your experience. I'm not saying you want them frequently or at any price (the Starbucks example is of a non-mindful spender as proposed by the PP). I'm saying that if mangoes were $$$, you'd probably never have had one so you wouldn't know you liked them and wouldn't ever want one now.

I could have had them at a restaurant, wedding, friend’s house, etc.

Ok. Let's say $$$ is $5k.

I don’t understand what you are trying to say.

I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

And I said that’s not true. I could attend a wedding, xmas party, or work meeting where caviar is served. I could be on vacation where something is offered. I could have read about ostrich eggs or sushi and want to try it.

The point is that just bc I like it or want to try it, doesn’t mean the cost justifies the purchase/satisfying the desire. Likely, mindful spenders are more flexible (I’m okay w/no appetizer/guac/mango and am just as happy with tap water/the basic order/the matinee/whatever). Gratification is more flexibly delayed with no feeling of depravation.

Maybe you've had mango (because you could afford it or someone else could afford to give it to you - like at a wedding) or you have never had it but want to try it. Either way, your life experience is shaping your desire to have one now.

NP-Yes, as a frugal person who has often justified NOT doing/eating something due to cost, now that I've had those experiences I realize that sometimes not doing it means you keep thinking about it and it creates not only lack of enjoyment in the moment, but also regret in the long term: I will never go to Barcelona again and I regret just seeing the outside of the Sagrada Familia. I regret not having a Bellini in Venice. In retrospect, I could afford both. I focused on the mindfulness in the moment rather than the long term intentional spending. So now I do spend on these sorts of things because I realize something it's better to spend and enjoy both the experience and the memory of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you are someone who gets what you want but truly wants very little. A non-mindful spender who spends way less than most mindful ones?

If you get what you want without consideration of price, you’re not a mindful spender. You don’t give it another thought regarding value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc.

But isn't what we want often based on price to begin with?

Not if you’re not mindful. You want it, you get it, obviously within reason. You’re not getting a Birken just bc you want it. But if you’re not mindful, then if you want it, you don’t have any consideration for the price most of the time. You want it, you get it.

Mindful considers the questions above: value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc. Mindful still means you’ll get the item but have almost instantaneously run through whether it was worth it: Diet Coke, coffee, this gas station, fruit, whatever.

But we want things based on our experience and that ties into price. I want a Starbucks latte because I've had them and liked them. So I buy one without a second thought. I've never had a super expensive, super fancy latte. Don't even know where I'd get one. So I'm unlikely to want one to begin with.

Absolutely not…I like mangoes but don’t buy them if they are over certain price. I would almost never get a coffee out unless meeting a friend.

It sounds like you do want things (mangoes, coffee out) based on your experience. I'm not saying you want them frequently or at any price (the Starbucks example is of a non-mindful spender as proposed by the PP). I'm saying that if mangoes were $$$, you'd probably never have had one so you wouldn't know you liked them and wouldn't ever want one now.

I could have had them at a restaurant, wedding, friend’s house, etc.

Ok. Let's say $$$ is $5k.

I don’t understand what you are trying to say.

I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

And I said that’s not true. I could attend a wedding, xmas party, or work meeting where caviar is served. I could be on vacation where something is offered. I could have read about ostrich eggs or sushi and want to try it.

The point is that just bc I like it or want to try it, doesn’t mean the cost justifies the purchase/satisfying the desire. Likely, mindful spenders are more flexible (I’m okay w/no appetizer/guac/mango and am just as happy with tap water/the basic order/the matinee/whatever). Gratification is more flexibly delayed with no feeling of depravation.

Maybe you've had mango (because you could afford it or someone else could afford to give it to you - like at a wedding) or you have never had it but want to try it. Either way, your life experience is shaping your desire to have one now.

Kolrabi was at a store recently. Never tried it, never seen it, never cooked it, never smelled it, etc. what life experience caused me to buy it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But, I'm pp, and I disagree that buying Taylor Swift tickets for your kids will teach them about value, which is the very point of this thread. So, why bother getting angry about occasional guac when you're going to shell out $1500 pp for concert tickets.

Yeah, it does, but you don’t get it. All I can do is suggest you go back and reread prior responses. You’re probably the same person who believes kids don’t need this lesson bc they will learn it anyway by seeing prices on a menu.

People here have argued endlessly that if you buy guac every week you cannot possibly save. People have said it will cut down on your overall savings goals. You could buy extra guac for 41+ years weekly to add up to a single Taylor Swift concert.

You're the one who doesn't get it. Based on OP's premise and these response, not on what you believe (spend on outing that will live in your memories forevr). You can't have it both ways!

My guess is everyone on this post who is a mindful spender, gets what I am saying. I’ll make one final effort:

Mindful spenders spend money on wants but:

- not on every want

- generally not without considering the value of the purchase (is this a good/fair deal for x - and x is anything from an add on like guac, to gas, to a coffee)

- they focus on making choices where the want has meaning to them (yes to a vacation where they spend more, no to a popcorn at the movie)

- they focus on finances for the future, even if it means every want is not obtained in the present

- they usually don’t feel deprived when saying no to a want

This means that they may save a year of coffee money but also get TSwift tickets. Non mindful spenders live more for today and get both the coffee and tickets when they want them.

Everyone gets your insufferability. Are you a man? Because you’re acting like one. 👍🏻 A lack of reading comprehension and a pedantic nature.

It does reek of mansplaining, doesn’t it?

Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you are someone who gets what you want but truly wants very little. A non-mindful spender who spends way less than most mindful ones?

If you get what you want without consideration of price, you’re not a mindful spender. You don’t give it another thought regarding value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc.

But isn't what we want often based on price to begin with?

Not if you’re not mindful. You want it, you get it, obviously within reason. You’re not getting a Birken just bc you want it. But if you’re not mindful, then if you want it, you don’t have any consideration for the price most of the time. You want it, you get it.

Mindful considers the questions above: value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc. Mindful still means you’ll get the item but have almost instantaneously run through whether it was worth it: Diet Coke, coffee, this gas station, fruit, whatever.

But we want things based on our experience and that ties into price. I want a Starbucks latte because I've had them and liked them. So I buy one without a second thought. I've never had a super expensive, super fancy latte. Don't even know where I'd get one. So I'm unlikely to want one to begin with.

Absolutely not…I like mangoes but don’t buy them if they are over certain price. I would almost never get a coffee out unless meeting a friend.

It sounds like you do want things (mangoes, coffee out) based on your experience. I'm not saying you want them frequently or at any price (the Starbucks example is of a non-mindful spender as proposed by the PP). I'm saying that if mangoes were $$$, you'd probably never have had one so you wouldn't know you liked them and wouldn't ever want one now.

I could have had them at a restaurant, wedding, friend’s house, etc.

Ok. Let's say $$$ is $5k.

I don’t understand what you are trying to say.

I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

And I said that’s not true. I could attend a wedding, xmas party, or work meeting where caviar is served. I could be on vacation where something is offered. I could have read about ostrich eggs or sushi and want to try it.

The point is that just bc I like it or want to try it, doesn’t mean the cost justifies the purchase/satisfying the desire. Likely, mindful spenders are more flexible (I’m okay w/no appetizer/guac/mango and am just as happy with tap water/the basic order/the matinee/whatever). Gratification is more flexibly delayed with no feeling of depravation.

Maybe you've had mango (because you could afford it or someone else could afford to give it to you - like at a wedding) or you have never had it but want to try it. Either way, your life experience is shaping your desire to have one now.

Kolrabi was at a store recently. Never tried it, never seen it, never cooked it, never smelled it, etc. what life experience caused me to buy it?

Yours

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you are someone who gets what you want but truly wants very little. A non-mindful spender who spends way less than most mindful ones?

If you get what you want without consideration of price, you’re not a mindful spender. You don’t give it another thought regarding value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc.

But isn't what we want often based on price to begin with?

Not if you’re not mindful. You want it, you get it, obviously within reason. You’re not getting a Birken just bc you want it. But if you’re not mindful, then if you want it, you don’t have any consideration for the price most of the time. You want it, you get it.

Mindful considers the questions above: value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc. Mindful still means you’ll get the item but have almost instantaneously run through whether it was worth it: Diet Coke, coffee, this gas station, fruit, whatever.

But we want things based on our experience and that ties into price. I want a Starbucks latte because I've had them and liked them. So I buy one without a second thought. I've never had a super expensive, super fancy latte. Don't even know where I'd get one. So I'm unlikely to want one to begin with.

Absolutely not…I like mangoes but don’t buy them if they are over certain price. I would almost never get a coffee out unless meeting a friend.

It sounds like you do want things (mangoes, coffee out) based on your experience. I'm not saying you want them frequently or at any price (the Starbucks example is of a non-mindful spender as proposed by the PP). I'm saying that if mangoes were $$$, you'd probably never have had one so you wouldn't know you liked them and wouldn't ever want one now.

I could have had them at a restaurant, wedding, friend’s house, etc.

Ok. Let's say $$$ is $5k.

I don’t understand what you are trying to say.

I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

And I said that’s not true. I could attend a wedding, xmas party, or work meeting where caviar is served. I could be on vacation where something is offered. I could have read about ostrich eggs or sushi and want to try it.

The point is that just bc I like it or want to try it, doesn’t mean the cost justifies the purchase/satisfying the desire. Likely, mindful spenders are more flexible (I’m okay w/no appetizer/guac/mango and am just as happy with tap water/the basic order/the matinee/whatever). Gratification is more flexibly delayed with no feeling of depravation.

Maybe you've had mango (because you could afford it or someone else could afford to give it to you - like at a wedding) or you have never had it but want to try it. Either way, your life experience is shaping your desire to have one now.

Kolrabi was at a store recently. Never tried it, never seen it, never cooked it, never smelled it, etc. what life experience caused me to buy it?

Yours

Completely goes against what you’re saying.

[Anonymous]

The above response related to this person's response: I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

The issue isn't whether we had mangoes, like mangoes, and want more mangoes based on our experience. This thread is about people who like/want mangoes for whatever reason (even if they never heard of them before). Some will get them whenever they want them and others will assess whether it is worth it in that moment to have them again. Obviously, we aren't talking about people who don't want mangoes or guac, smoothies or gas. We also aren't talking about how our experiences shape our desire for something. There can be no experience with something (let's say a kid says "Mom, buy me a Godiva chocolate bar" and the mom has never heard of it before and it isn't for her anyway. Her desire or lack thereof to buy it isn't based on her experiences. But whether she decides to buy it or anything else (so long as she can afford it) is largely based on whether she's a mindful buyer or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The above response related to this person's response: I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

The issue isn't whether we had mangoes, like mangoes, and want more mangoes based on our experience. This thread is about people who like/want mangoes for whatever reason (even if they never heard of them before). Some will get them whenever they want them and others will assess whether it is worth it in that moment to have them again. Obviously, we aren't talking about people who don't want mangoes or guac, smoothies or gas. We also aren't talking about how our experiences shape our desire for something. There can be no experience with something (let's say a kid says "Mom, buy me a Godiva chocolate bar" and the mom has never heard of it before and it isn't for her anyway. Her desire or lack thereof to buy it isn't based on her experiences. But whether she decides to buy it or anything else (so long as she can afford it) is largely based on whether she's a mindful buyer or not.

And part of the reason it feels so nonsensical to the people who say "get the guac" without a second thought is that someone else's decisions about what to spend money on is so personal!

My immigrant father would have told us "no" had we dared order a $2 soda when eating out as kids* - but when I was a full-grown adult, with a well-paying job, I mentioned to my parents that cherries were $8/lbs (DC area, early spring) and I wasn't going to buy them. When my mom visited me a few weeks later, she said my dad insisted that she buy me some cherries.

To him, fruit was worth the extra cost - but soda wasn't.

*pretty sure he'd never tell his grandkids "no"!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The above response related to this person's response: I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

The issue isn't whether we had mangoes, like mangoes, and want more mangoes based on our experience. This thread is about people who like/want mangoes for whatever reason (even if they never heard of them before). Some will get them whenever they want them and others will assess whether it is worth it in that moment to have them again. Obviously, we aren't talking about people who don't want mangoes or guac, smoothies or gas. We also aren't talking about how our experiences shape our desire for something. There can be no experience with something (let's say a kid says "Mom, buy me a Godiva chocolate bar" and the mom has never heard of it before and it isn't for her anyway. Her desire or lack thereof to buy it isn't based on her experiences. But whether she decides to buy it or anything else (so long as she can afford it) is largely based on whether she's a mindful buyer or not.

So buying it once = not being mindful? Or buying all the godiva bars all the time = not being mindful? Are you defining mindfulness as total deprivation of wants?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The above response related to this person's response: I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

The issue isn't whether we had mangoes, like mangoes, and want more mangoes based on our experience. This thread is about people who like/want mangoes for whatever reason (even if they never heard of them before). Some will get them whenever they want them and others will assess whether it is worth it in that moment to have them again. Obviously, we aren't talking about people who don't want mangoes or guac, smoothies or gas. We also aren't talking about how our experiences shape our desire for something. There can be no experience with something (let's say a kid says "Mom, buy me a Godiva chocolate bar" and the mom has never heard of it before and it isn't for her anyway. Her desire or lack thereof to buy it isn't based on her experiences. But whether she decides to buy it or anything else (so long as she can afford it) is largely based on whether she's a mindful buyer or not.

So buying it once = not being mindful? Or buying all the godiva bars all the time = not being mindful? Are you defining mindfulness as total deprivation of wants?

What? No none of this is right. You need to read the last few pages

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The above response related to this person's response: I'm trying to say that we want is based on our life experiences and those are based in part, on money. So you want mangoes because you've had them and liked them and you've had them because you could afford them. If you could never afford them, you wouldn't know you liked them so you may not want them. Maybe you'd want an apple instead.

The issue isn't whether we had mangoes, like mangoes, and want more mangoes based on our experience. This thread is about people who like/want mangoes for whatever reason (even if they never heard of them before). Some will get them whenever they want them and others will assess whether it is worth it in that moment to have them again. Obviously, we aren't talking about people who don't want mangoes or guac, smoothies or gas. We also aren't talking about how our experiences shape our desire for something. There can be no experience with something (let's say a kid says "Mom, buy me a Godiva chocolate bar" and the mom has never heard of it before and it isn't for her anyway. Her desire or lack thereof to buy it isn't based on her experiences. But whether she decides to buy it or anything else (so long as she can afford it) is largely based on whether she's a mindful buyer or not.

And part of the reason it feels so nonsensical to the people who say "get the guac" without a second thought is that someone else's decisions about what to spend money on is so personal!

My immigrant father would have told us "no" had we dared order a $2 soda when eating out as kids* - but when I was a full-grown adult, with a well-paying job, I mentioned to my parents that cherries were $8/lbs (DC area, early spring) and I wasn't going to buy them. When my mom visited me a few weeks later, she said my dad insisted that she buy me some cherries.

To him, fruit was worth the extra cost - but soda wasn't.

*pretty sure he'd never tell his grandkids "no"!

Wld your dad have said no to cherries at that price when you were a kid?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if you are someone who gets what you want but truly wants very little. A non-mindful spender who spends way less than most mindful ones?

If you get what you want without consideration of price, you’re not a mindful spender. You don’t give it another thought regarding value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc.

But isn't what we want often based on price to begin with?

Not if you’re not mindful. You want it, you get it, obviously within reason. You’re not getting a Birken just bc you want it. But if you’re not mindful, then if you want it, you don’t have any consideration for the price most of the time. You want it, you get it.

Mindful considers the questions above: value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc. Mindful still means you’ll get the item but have almost instantaneously run through whether it was worth it: Diet Coke, coffee, this gas station, fruit, whatever.

But we want things based on our experience and that ties into price. I want a Starbucks latte because I've had them and liked them. So I buy one without a second thought. I've never had a super expensive, super fancy latte. Don't even know where I'd get one. So I'm unlikely to want one to begin with.

Absolutely not…I like mangoes but don’t buy them if they are over certain price. I would almost never get a coffee out unless meeting a friend.

Look. That’s fine, but if you are making $450k +, that’s a personal preference. That’s not adding up to anything meaningful.

We want to pay for our kids private schools, so we bought a smaller house that we didn’t do a huge renovation on, we paid cash for used cars, and we take average, not first class, vacations. That’s how we afford to pay for our kids school. We could also send them to public school and have the bigger house and fancier vacations. It’s a trade off.

But nowhere in this trade-off is the price of gas or whether or not we purchase the occasional Starbucks or pricey mango. Because those things don’t make a difference.

Upthread there was a gas and plain weekly Sbux coffee that added to almost $1000/year. During your kid’s minority, that’s close to $20,000. Now if this is your mindset, it will extrapolates beyond mangoes and gas. Over the years and across the scope of expenses, it is a huge amount.

How much is tuition? Is it worth it to you to give up 1 sbux a week + find nearby cheaper gas in order to have $20,000 extra in 20 years? You need to make that call.

But to say these aren’t meaningful savings when it is applied to lots of purchases is fooling yourself.

No. Denying myself coffee out for 20 years and spending 100 hours driving to the cheaper gas station is not worth 2 weeks salary.

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Anonymous wrote:What if you are someone who gets what you want but truly wants very little. A non-mindful spender who spends way less than most mindful ones?

If you get what you want without consideration of price, you’re not a mindful spender. You don’t give it another thought regarding value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc.

But isn't what we want often based on price to begin with?

Not if you’re not mindful. You want it, you get it, obviously within reason. You’re not getting a Birken just bc you want it. But if you’re not mindful, then if you want it, you don’t have any consideration for the price most of the time. You want it, you get it.

Mindful considers the questions above: value, price, alternatives, frequency (we already got takeout 2x last week), amount you could save by not getting it, do you really want the item, etc. Mindful still means you’ll get the item but have almost instantaneously run through whether it was worth it: Diet Coke, coffee, this gas station, fruit, whatever.

But we want things based on our experience and that ties into price. I want a Starbucks latte because I've had them and liked them. So I buy one without a second thought. I've never had a super expensive, super fancy latte. Don't even know where I'd get one. So I'm unlikely to want one to begin with.

Absolutely not…I like mangoes but don’t buy them if they are over certain price. I would almost never get a coffee out unless meeting a friend.

Look. That’s fine, but if you are making $450k +, that’s a personal preference. That’s not adding up to anything meaningful.

We want to pay for our kids private schools, so we bought a smaller house that we didn’t do a huge renovation on, we paid cash for used cars, and we take average, not first class, vacations. That’s how we afford to pay for our kids school. We could also send them to public school and have the bigger house and fancier vacations. It’s a trade off.

But nowhere in this trade-off is the price of gas or whether or not we purchase the occasional Starbucks or pricey mango. Because those things don’t make a difference.

Upthread there was a gas and plain weekly Sbux coffee that added to almost $1000/year. During your kid’s minority, that’s close to $20,000. Now if this is your mindset, it will extrapolates beyond mangoes and gas. Over the years and across the scope of expenses, it is a huge amount.

How much is tuition? Is it worth it to you to give up 1 sbux a week + find nearby cheaper gas in order to have $20,000 extra in 20 years? You need to make that call.

But to say these aren’t meaningful savings when it is applied to lots of purchases is fooling yourself.

No. Denying myself coffee out for 20 years and spending 100 hours driving to the cheaper gas station is not worth 2 weeks salary.

It is ONE coffee out a week and if you're not driving to sbux that one day, you're neutraling out the ONE MILE extra per week with the drive to a cheaper station. You don't get that it is not A coffee or A gas fill up. It is all those things bundled together that is a lot of money. But pick it apart and reduce your savings. It seems you would be very, very unhappy having to delay any gratification for any period of time. Different strokes...

[Anonymous]

For me, the wanting and the mindfulness are tied together. I'm not going to want it (unless absolutely necessary), if I can't fairly easily afford it.