Weigh in: Who's right in this ridiculous same-day birthday party drama?

[Anonymous]

Jen and Kim are sisters.

Jen has four children, and her son Aiden turned 3 at the end of May. They did not have a party, but went on an overnight trip on his birthday weekend. Kim has two children, and her daughter Isabelle is turning 3 at the end of June. They planned to have a family/preschool friends party. Parties with grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc are the norm in this family, as everyone is local.

Jen hears from a relative that Kim has asked about availability for some people to attend Isabelle’s birthday party the Saturday following her birthday. Jen had planned to have a party for Aiden that day, but had only asked a few other relatives about their availability. Jen and Kim talk and become aware of each other’s tentative plans. Jen suggests a joint party, Kim declines. Jen suggests that Kim have Isabelle’s party the weekend before her birthday. Kim says they are too busy during that week to put the party together, and also does not want to have Isabelle’s party before her actual birthday. Grandparents request against having one party on Saturday and the other on Sunday (just too much party for one weekend). Jen suggests she have Aiden’s party the next weekend (now looking into July), but Kim’s family is leaving for vacation that day. Kim says they would not be able to come, but understands if Jen chooses that day for Aiden’s party.

Jen and Kim can’t come to an agreement. Kim messages Jen to tell her that Isabelle’s party is definitely going to be on the day in question and gives her the time. Jen responds with “Fine.” The next day, Kim receives an e-vite, sent to the entire family, for Aiden’s birthday party on the same day.

Who’s right? Who’s being a jerk? Obviously, I am either Kim or Jen, but I won’t reveal myself yet (just in case it isn’t obvious)

[Anonymous]

First, I think you are Kim.

Second, Kim is right because
1. it is the weekend following her child's birthday while Jen already waited a month and
2. Kim let Jen know her firm plan and Jen, bitchy at best, sent the whole family an evite to steal the day.

[Anonymous]

Jen used her kid's birthday weekend for a trip which to me reads as a you snooze you lose. However, she had the best idea on trying to make it a joint party. Kim should've agreed...what was so bad about a joint party?

[Anonymous]

Everybody is being a jerk. It's a birthday party for three-year-olds, not the Paris peace accords.

[Anonymous]

Jen's wrong. Kim clearly and reasonably wants her kid's bday party to be the weekend after her bday. That makes perfect sense. It makes no sense at all to insist on a specific date for Aiden's party that is now at least a month a way from his actual bday. Jen decided not to have a party for her son and to go on a trip - a perfectly acceptable and reasonably decision. She can't undo that now and expect the rest of the family to deal with her very-belated-bday party scheduling.

I also think the grandparents are making this too difficult by insisting they not be on a sat and sunday.

I'll also say that I'd be furious at my sisters if they were either Kim or Jen. I would hope two sisters would be able to work out details of this without all the drama.

[Anonymous]

Kim should have agreed to a joint party. Get over yourself.

[Anonymous]

Well, Kim should have been flexible with the joint party. The first mistake was on her.

Jen was a bitch to send an evite for Aiden's party without talking to Kim.

Both were wrong, but Kim could have avoided the whole thing by having a joint party. You're family, they are only three. The kids would love it I'm sure.

[Anonymous]

Lol. Sisters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everybody is being a jerk. It's a birthday party for three-year-olds, not the Paris peace accords.

+1
LOL!

[Anonymous]

Why should Kim have to have a joint party when Aidens birthday was a month ago and Jen already did something for him? (I'm not OP/Kim.)

[Anonymous]

joint party

[Anonymous]

I think Jen should have had her son's party closer to his actual birthday. I also think that Kim should have at least heard her out on the joint birthday thing. If they had totally different ideas on what to do, they could have then said ok, separate parties. (we did a joint family party for the 3 nieces who have close birthdays and are the same age but live far from each other - it was great.)

I feel kind of sorry for the family, if this is how things are going and the kids are only 3.

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I think Kim is kind of being a jerk for now just having the joint party. It's 3 year olds not 8 year olds. What's the BFD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why should Kim have to have a joint party when Aidens birthday was a month ago and Jen already did something for him? (I'm not OP/Kim.)

Because I'm not even in this family and I'm already annoyed by these two sisters.

[Anonymous]

No one is right here. Both Jen and Kim are jerks. Your kids are THREE, but the moms are the ones acting like toddlers.