NYT article on LCPS high school re: racism

[Anonymous]

Whatever you feels about the "appropriateness" of the boy's decision to hold onto the video and strategically release, I will guarantee that white kids in Loudoun County will (1.) think a lot harder before they use the n-word and (2.) never put it on social media.

She became the scapegoat in order for the rest of the white community in Loudoun to have a wake-up call. In that sense - mission accomplished.

The NYT's story left out so much historical context about Loudoun County that I think would better ground the incident. There's a looooooooooong history in Loudoun of opposition to desegregation, support for the KKK, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She did not use it as a slur. She ignorantly used a word that she should not have but it was not used/meant by her in a derogatory way. It was also when she was a freshman in HS!! I cannot get over how people think a freshman doing this stupid thing should mean the consequence of being dropped from the college she intended to go to. That is just so wildly disproportionate. Continuing to try to tar and feather kids for doing dumb sh*t when young puts the focus on the wrong thing.

There is NO other way to use it. It’s a slur.

DP. So when black people use it, it has to also be a slur, and as a black person who opposes the use of the word I should be able to demand consequences against blacks who use it? If there is NO other way to use it, then I'd say yes. She was 15 and possibly was stupid enough to think there was a nonracist way of using the word. Do you not recall being 15 and immature?

Stupid yes. Racist,no. I grew up in Georgia too but my parents had the sense to teach me white people don’t get to use the N word.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your rich white kid is too stupid to know at 15 they shouldn’t say the N word you did a horrible job raising them. Sadly she has to pay for her parents crappy parenting but she did learn a lesson.

I wouldn’t be so smug that this had anything to do with parenting. You know where my kid learned the N word? At school. In MCPS! At Westbrook Elementary School in Bethesda!!! The N word was never in my family’s vocabulary or even on the radar of things to say. Ever! So don’t be so high and mighty that parents had anything to do with this. You are very ignorant if you believe your own words.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I'm a POC. I've always found racism to be worse in more "diverse" (read larger minority population) areas, usually coming from the POC themselves. I grew up in the suburbs, in an area that reflected the USA demographics when it came to racial makeup, although we more educated than the more "diverse" areas - and more conservative; there was little to no racism there. I never experienced racism that was intentionally hurtful, yes there were subtle jokes, but it went both ways and we all knew it was not intentional because we we all close. Everyone was accepted as the person they were. They were treated based on personality and attitude, not on skin color. Before you claim that this is racism, no it isn't. I never perceived it as that way, it is not "micro-aggression". I was never aggressed, I gave back probably more than I received. it was only conducted by those who were close, never by a stranger.
I didn't experience racism until I moved out of the area to a more "diverse" area. the vast majority of the racism I experienced was from the POC who tended to isolate themselves to people of their own race. They were far less educated than the minorities I grew up with. I guess it is their lack of education and self-imposed isolation to their own race that lent to a tendency to see racism everywhere as an excuse for their own failures in society. If you feel a need to find racism, you can perceive it anywhere. This kid probably has feelings of inadequacy and felt a need to rationalize his existence.

I’m a person of color and I have had the opposite experience in a way. I have found that in a diverse area, it is the White people who act far more berserk. I grew up in West Virginia and White people were racist but at least outwardly polite and did not act like they felt threatened by people of color. When I went to a diverse college white people were segregating themselves and generally behaved very poorly. They seemed threatened.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whatever you feels about the "appropriateness" of the boy's decision to hold onto the video and strategically release, I will guarantee that white kids in Loudoun County will (1.) think a lot harder before they use the n-word and (2.) never put it on social media.

She became the scapegoat in order for the rest of the white community in Loudoun to have a wake-up call. In that sense - mission accomplished.

The NYT's story left out so much historical context about Loudoun County that I think would better ground the incident. There's a looooooooooong history in Loudoun of opposition to desegregation, support for the KKK, etc.

It is unfortunate that the young lady is essentially a scapegoat, but sometimes, life isn’t fair.

Sometimes you do something wrong and the anvil comes for you. That’s life. How many young black men have spent decades in prison because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time? And they don’t get 24 pages of hand-wringing from white people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She made a mistake and should suffer consequences but I’m not a believer in public shaming.

+1
Really can’t stand the lynch mob mentality of social media.

Social media is just the public square of this century. It's where we debate....and where we have digital "stockades" to enforce social norms.

We haven't evolved all that much from our ancestors who forced adultresses/single mothers to wear scarlet letters, put criminals in public stockades in order to set an example for the town, tar & feathering, etc.

Except, these days, we do it to ourselves by posting dumb sh#t on social media for the entire world to see. Our own fat fingers and big mouths get us into trouble and we can go viral.

If you need to "work something out," get a therapist who is bound by confidentiality laws and rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your rich white kid is too stupid to know at 15 they shouldn’t say the N word you did a horrible job raising them. Sadly she has to pay for her parents crappy parenting but she did learn a lesson.

I wouldn’t be so smug that this had anything to do with parenting. You know where my kid learned the N word? At school. In MCPS! At Westbrook Elementary School in Bethesda!!! The N word was never in my family’s vocabulary or even on the radar of things to say. Ever! So don’t be so high and mighty that parents had anything to do with this. You are very ignorant if you believe your own words.

Did the school make your kid say it? Kids learn lots of things. They get exposed to a lot of garbage. Only the ones with crappy raising don’t know the difference between “I heard someone say that” and “I can say it too’”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I'm a POC. I've always found racism to be worse in more "diverse" (read larger minority population) areas, usually coming from the POC themselves. I grew up in the suburbs, in an area that reflected the USA demographics when it came to racial makeup, although we more educated than the more "diverse" areas - and more conservative; there was little to no racism there. I never experienced racism that was intentionally hurtful, yes there were subtle jokes, but it went both ways and we all knew it was not intentional because we we all close. Everyone was accepted as the person they were. They were treated based on personality and attitude, not on skin color. Before you claim that this is racism, no it isn't. I never perceived it as that way, it is not "micro-aggression". I was never aggressed, I gave back probably more than I received. it was only conducted by those who were close, never by a stranger.
I didn't experience racism until I moved out of the area to a more "diverse" area. the vast majority of the racism I experienced was from the POC who tended to isolate themselves to people of their own race. They were far less educated than the minorities I grew up with. I guess it is their lack of education and self-imposed isolation to their own race that lent to a tendency to see racism everywhere as an excuse for their own failures in society. If you feel a need to find racism, you can perceive it anywhere. This kid probably has feelings of inadequacy and felt a need to rationalize his existence.

I’m a person of color and I have had the opposite experience in a way. I have found that in a diverse area, it is the White people who act far more berserk. I grew up in West Virginia and White people were racist but at least outwardly polite and did not act like they felt threatened by people of color. When I went to a diverse college white people were segregating themselves and generally behaved very poorly. They seemed threatened.

LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“ Are you willfully obtuse?! Several posters, including yourself, are defending this girl. You are desperately trying to shift the blame off her and anywhere else. The person responsible for this girl saying the n word is herself. She said it happily. She posted it on Tic Toc. Rappers didn’t make this girl say the n word. In fact you don’t even know if she listens to rap. All you know is that she uses a vile, racist slur in her daily vocabulary. She’s so comfortable using the word that she recorded herself and posted it for everyone to see.”

I’m not PP but you are treating this kid as if: 1) she was a grown adult when it happened and 2) she hurled the word as a slur to hurt someone. Neither is true. No one is saying it I just fine for her to use it. What many of us are saying is that kids do dumb stuff and this falls in that category - not the “she’s evil and deserves serious harm” category.

And i never said she was evil. However, unlike you and too many other posters I’m not giving her a pass and blaming everyone around her. She isn’t an 8 year old. She was 15 and that is old enough to understand the slur. The issue is she is too comfortable using a slur. Doesn’t matter in what text or tone. Is it ever alright to use a gay slur? Or an anti Semitic slur?

No it’s never ok. This girl was stupid and racist in 9th grade and and should have had serious consequences then. maybe she still is racist and stupid! but do you seriously want to kick all the boys, black and white, who have ever uttered the word f@ggot or made sexist, misogynist remarks in 9th grade out of college?

So suddenly at 18 she was no longer racist? Umm...ok...sure.

We should all be defined by what we do at 15?

If it’s throwing out racist slurs like money at a strip club. Then yeah. People don’t forget that. Just like adults don’t forget the people who bullied them in childhood.

I didn’t forget the black kid who regularly bullied me in high school (it was demeaning that only his brother’s white girlfriend seemed to be able to get him to stop), but neither did I try to sabotage his life. He seemed to be doing that quite well on his own, but if he eventually turned things around good for him. This Jimmy kid seems to have targeted the white girl in a predatory manner because she was pretty and popular and getting the attention he thought he deserved instead. He needs help before he turns into another Andrew Cunanan.

I didn’t forget the white teenager who called me the n word everyday as he waited for his bus and I entered the school (I was in elementary school btw). No one did anything and it didn’t stop until my parents removed me from the school. I also didn’t forget the white kid who bullied me in middle school just bc she could. Again, no one did anything.

I will never forget the kid who spewed anti Semitic words at my daughter in elementary school. Did you know that schools take actions that you don’t know about? They are not allowed to tell anyone outside of the trangressor’s family what consequences are doled out. I reported the incident to the principal and he said he was not allowed to tell me what the consequences were. So maybe there was action taken but you were never told what it was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whatever you feels about the "appropriateness" of the boy's decision to hold onto the video and strategically release, I will guarantee that white kids in Loudoun County will (1.) think a lot harder before they use the n-word and (2.) never put it on social media.

She became the scapegoat in order for the rest of the white community in Loudoun to have a wake-up call. In that sense - mission accomplished.

The NYT's story left out so much historical context about Loudoun County that I think would better ground the incident. There's a looooooooooong history in Loudoun of opposition to desegregation, support for the KKK, etc.

It is unfortunate that the young lady is essentially a scapegoat, but sometimes, life isn’t fair.

Sometimes you do something wrong and the anvil comes for you. That’s life. How many young black men have spent decades in prison because they were in the wrong place at the wrong time? And they don’t get 24 pages of hand-wringing from white people.

And sometimes you do something wrong and can’t find employment as an adult because people realize what kind of awful person you are.
So Jimmy, enjoy your college that no one has ever heard of, and also enjoy the fact that no one is going to want to hire you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your rich white kid is too stupid to know at 15 they shouldn’t say the N word you did a horrible job raising them. Sadly she has to pay for her parents crappy parenting but she did learn a lesson.

I wouldn’t be so smug that this had anything to do with parenting. You know where my kid learned the N word? At school. In MCPS! At Westbrook Elementary School in Bethesda!!! The N word was never in my family’s vocabulary or even on the radar of things to say. Ever! So don’t be so high and mighty that parents had anything to do with this. You are very ignorant if you believe your own words.

Did the school make your kid say it? Kids learn lots of things. They get exposed to a lot of garbage. Only the ones with crappy raising don’t know the difference between “I heard someone say that” and “I can say it too’”

You couldn’t be more wrong. And you obviously know nothing about raising children.

[Anonymous]

We're an interracial family with biracial kids in Loudoun. My kids are younger -- one just started K in LCPS this year. This makes me so sad and worried.

I grew up in a very white, rural area with hardly any minority kids. I've always sworn I'd never live somewhere where my kids are the only "brown" or black kids in their class. That part we don't have to worry about, although most of the other brown kids are South Asian, and there's no socioeconomic diversity at all.

On the other hand, after DH moved to the U.S. in upper elementary school, he lived in MoCo and Howard Co. Always in diverse schools except the years he was in private school. He insists he never was discriminated against, never called the N-word, but he has said he felt like an outsider in the mostly white private schools. But he also says those schools were much better for his education.

Feels like we're damned if we do, damned if we don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:“ Are you willfully obtuse?! Several posters, including yourself, are defending this girl. You are desperately trying to shift the blame off her and anywhere else. The person responsible for this girl saying the n word is herself. She said it happily. She posted it on Tic Toc. Rappers didn’t make this girl say the n word. In fact you don’t even know if she listens to rap. All you know is that she uses a vile, racist slur in her daily vocabulary. She’s so comfortable using the word that she recorded herself and posted it for everyone to see.”

I’m not PP but you are treating this kid as if: 1) she was a grown adult when it happened and 2) she hurled the word as a slur to hurt someone. Neither is true. No one is saying it I just fine for her to use it. What many of us are saying is that kids do dumb stuff and this falls in that category - not the “she’s evil and deserves serious harm” category.

And i never said she was evil. However, unlike you and too many other posters I’m not giving her a pass and blaming everyone around her. She isn’t an 8 year old. She was 15 and that is old enough to understand the slur. The issue is she is too comfortable using a slur. Doesn’t matter in what text or tone. Is it ever alright to use a gay slur? Or an anti Semitic slur?

No it’s never ok. This girl was stupid and racist in 9th grade and and should have had serious consequences then. maybe she still is racist and stupid! but do you seriously want to kick all the boys, black and white, who have ever uttered the word f@ggot or made sexist, misogynist remarks in 9th grade out of college?

So suddenly at 18 she was no longer racist? Umm...ok...sure.

We should all be defined by what we do at 15?

If it’s throwing out racist slurs like money at a strip club. Then yeah. People don’t forget that. Just like adults don’t forget the people who bullied them in childhood.

I didn’t forget the black kid who regularly bullied me in high school (it was demeaning that only his brother’s white girlfriend seemed to be able to get him to stop), but neither did I try to sabotage his life. He seemed to be doing that quite well on his own, but if he eventually turned things around good for him. This Jimmy kid seems to have targeted the white girl in a predatory manner because she was pretty and popular and getting the attention he thought he deserved instead. He needs help before he turns into another Andrew Cunanan.

I didn’t forget the white teenager who called me the n word everyday as he waited for his bus and I entered the school (I was in elementary school btw). No one did anything and it didn’t stop until my parents removed me from the school. I also didn’t forget the white kid who bullied me in middle school just bc she could. Again, no one did anything.

Sounds unpleasant. Did you then go look for a random white kid to attack based on a comment they’d made one time that wasn’t even directed to you? I didn’t go ratting out the next black kid I saw harassing a white kid - and it happened quite often at my school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I'm a POC. I've always found racism to be worse in more "diverse" (read larger minority population) areas, usually coming from the POC themselves. I grew up in the suburbs, in an area that reflected the USA demographics when it came to racial makeup, although we more educated than the more "diverse" areas - and more conservative; there was little to no racism there. I never experienced racism that was intentionally hurtful, yes there were subtle jokes, but it went both ways and we all knew it was not intentional because we we all close. Everyone was accepted as the person they were. They were treated based on personality and attitude, not on skin color. Before you claim that this is racism, no it isn't. I never perceived it as that way, it is not "micro-aggression". I was never aggressed, I gave back probably more than I received. it was only conducted by those who were close, never by a stranger.
I didn't experience racism until I moved out of the area to a more "diverse" area. the vast majority of the racism I experienced was from the POC who tended to isolate themselves to people of their own race. They were far less educated than the minorities I grew up with. I guess it is their lack of education and self-imposed isolation to their own race that lent to a tendency to see racism everywhere as an excuse for their own failures in society. If you feel a need to find racism, you can perceive it anywhere. This kid probably has feelings of inadequacy and felt a need to rationalize his existence.

I’m a person of color and I have had the opposite experience in a way. I have found that in a diverse area, it is the White people who act far more berserk. I grew up in West Virginia and White people were racist but at least outwardly polite and did not act like they felt threatened by people of color. When I went to a diverse college white people were segregating themselves and generally behaved very poorly. They seemed threatened.

LOL

What's so funny? I'm white and also grew up in West Virginia. I don't remember kids being outwardly racist toward the small handful of minority students (which doesn't mean it didn't happen, just that I never saw it). The real divisions and mistreatment were between the "rich" kids and the poor kids. I do remember my white friends repeating racist epithets they clearly heard from their parents, but not with anyone else around except other white kids.

That said, I'm pretty sure I was called "N-word lover" when I dated one of the few black kids in my class sophomore year. Never with him around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe white people still don’t understand why it’s not ok for them to use the word but it’s ok for black people. You really, really don’t see the difference?

This thread proves they do not. Nor do they understand how ignorant they are when using the saying “lynch mob” to describe people standing up against a racist person.

As a white guy, Chris Rock's thoughts on this 'dilemma' for white people was revelatory. Even I - as a white guy - can't tell if white people are serious when they trot out '...but but but rap music' argument when excusing the n-word. In half the cases, it's gas light and the other half are just really dumb people when no understanding of social dynamics.

Race, man, we live in an insane time. If you say the wrong thing, you in trouble. This is the first time in the history of the world where white men have to watch what they say. White men are getting in trouble for using the wrong words, its unbelievable.

[impersonating a white guy] “Well that’s not fair, you can say whatever you want. You can say n****.”

Well yeah, but last time I checked that’s the only advantage I have for being black. Wanna switch places? You can scream “n****” and I’ll raise interest rates. It’s the first time in the history of the world where the white men have to watch their tongue.

That’s how life works. Sometimes the people with the most shit have to shut up and let other people talk shit about them. Sometimes the people with the most shit get to say the least shit, and the people with the least shit get to say the most shit, so if you wanna say more shit, get rid of some of your shit.